Today, after trying to convince my girlfriend to have sex for almost 16 months, she finally said yes. I couldn't get it up the second she said it. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
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Great
Today, I finally had the opportunity to have sex with my girlfriend. This would be the first time for both of us, so I tried to make it really special. I had everything planned out to be very romantic. She loved how it was set up. After all that, I couldn't get it up at all, all night. FML
Today, after my girlfriend telling me for years that she would marry me in a heartbeat, I finally proposed. She said no. FML
Today, after a year of coaxing, I got my boyfriend of 18 months to agree to have sex with me. He decided his first course of action was to try to shove his flaccid penis into my unlubricated vagina. FML
Time is money
Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML
A tale as old as time
Today, I was about to lose my virginity. I couldn't get it up. FML
Nope
Today, I finally felt ready to have sex for the first time, with my boyfriend of nearly 8 months. When I told him, things became intimate and pants came off. He then looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can't do this." The rest of the night was spent in awkward silence. FML
Waste
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Two minutes in, he goes, "Wow, this is strenuous" and stopped. I waited three years for this. FML
Today, after months of trying to make my girlfriend orgasm, she finally did. It was with my brother. I'll definitely knock next time. FML
Today, my girlfriend of a year and I had sex for the first time in several weeks due to relationship problems; I came in less than 10 seconds. We're still having problems. FML
Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my cock over my jeans and said, "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML
Top comments
vadaaa 11
Why did you try to convince your girlfriend for sex for 16 months? Didn't it dawn on you after the first attempt that no means no and she will when she is ready to?
truesarrif 33
that's what foreplay is for?
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Comments (228)
raesos91 26
I think you just **** blocked yourself.
cmbar831 14
It happens to a lot of people. Just be patient with her
sarah6786 14
Well maybe you needed to wait another second then :)
B0u_fml 18
16 months!?
TheMathMajor 26
They are probably young, and even if they aren't, the woman can wait however long she wants. No one is obligated to sex just because they've been dating for a long time.
cmbar831 14
I agree with avocado
m8nchld 1
of course she isnt obligated, but he also isnt obligated to stay with a girl who, after 16 months, obviously doesnt care about his needs any more than he cares about hers. and obviously his "trying to convince" was completely weak: its not like he forced himself on her, and he obviously never gave her some great ultimatum of "sleep with me or Ill break up with you!"
WhisperSoflty 20
94 - you sound like an asshole. Please, for the sake of humanity, always use two forms of birth control.
emilyjgraham 34
Holy fudge 94, sex isn't a NEED it's a want. A relationship works TWO ways! Her needs are just as important as his. He doesn't need sex, if he's had it before he might miss it but if he feels that strongly about sex he can go find someone else. You respect both each others decisions.
red_headforlife 15
Really, 94??? I can't believe someone would actually think that. Relationships aren't just based on sex. You should never feel obligated to have sex just to please someone's "needs" in a meaningful relationship.
cynicalhumanist 9
There are very few urges stronger than procreation/sex; namely your own survival, and survival of your offspring. To bundle the urge to have sex with the want to go bowling, skiing etc. is just preposterous. It's an integral part of human monogamy, both as a cultural and biological concept.
LiterOfCola 16
YDI for trying to "convince" her. Make it known your ready and wait for her to tell you when she is too if you respect her. You greasy rat, OP.
marxistbkly 3
Sounds like horrible communication. Waiting to let things happen us how little mistakes are made.
etchsanity1 11
Well 15 let's talk real quick the kid tries to convince his girlfriend to have sex... Not knowing their respective ages and assuming they are old enough for it what's the problem? He has been with her for 16 months so obviously he is not pressuring her or making her uncomfortable about it or she would have put an end to the relationship. When you get out of high school you may realize that communication in a relationship is not filled with pressuring and drama at all times. OP may just be saying they have talked about for months he didn't force himself on her or give her ultimatums he obviously respected her and her feelings on the matter and put sex on the back burner to having her as a girlfriend or he would have ended it. Please by all means tell me the masterpiece of logic employed by everyone to read 'convince' as "force it down her throat until her spirit is broken and she relents"
shanee108 9
You greasy rat? Lmfao
LiterOfCola 16
120: First of all, you shouldn't have to convince anyone to have sex with you for the first time. It's different if they'd done it before, but to convince someone into their first time with you, especially first time in general, is ****** up. I fail to see how it is "obvious" that OP wasn't pressuring his girlfriend. The FML hints that he actually was pressuring her. She probably does feel uncomfortable with her bf trying to convince her. Also, you are off to assume OP is older. They sound like virgins, and 16 months is precise, leading me to believe they are still in highschool. The problem is she might now know to end the relationship; it's a common problem with young girls. Regardless, you're wrong. You can make it known that you want to do it without convincing/pressuring
TheNewGuy03 28
"Convince" does definitely come off as desperation. However, whether or not this whole thing is an FML or a YDI depends on one thing: if they've done it before. If they did, and she just abruptly said, "Oh, hey, let's never do this anymore," then ... huge red flag. If they are in their mid-teens and it's their first relationship or whatnot, then it's a bit different and should be understood. I once knew a woman who would do everything that was sexually arousing and for extended periods of time and would stop short of actually doing it. Needless to say, I left, because blue balls are a ******* bitch.
etchsanity1 11
Ooooook let's look at this again super trooper I was referring to being old enough to have sex and handle it if they are 16 then this relationship started as early as14 and was leaning towards sex already ... That would have been the real issue here. I say obvious because in the full decade of additional life and relationship experience I have to pull from. If someone was pressuring you in an irritating or forceful manner you .... Drumroll please ... Dump them. She didn't so it follows that he couldn't have been pressuring that much. In the opposite direction sex was once again Obviously not his biggest priority or he would have dumped her to pursue easier quarry. Now granted young girls aren't always the best at ending relationships but once again if they are too young to handle breaking up they are way too young for sex. 16 months is an excessive amount of time for even the most insecure person to put up with something and not get rid of the offending person. Heck for all we know the girl may initiate things get everything to the cusp of sex itself and then back off leaving the guy to try and convince her to finish ... Just not enough info here for anyone to be judging the guy as a greasy rat my young friend.
louiseth 9
Heck, for all we know the guy could be a rainbow pterodactyl who lives in a palm tree made of skittles! It's still not really relevant though.
LiterOfCola 16
Okay 49, as super trooper I'd like to point out that the thumbs speak for themselves. It's pretty obvious that the guy was pressuring her. Young girls are often taken advantage of in these situations; if a guy doesn't get any, the worst that happens is blue balls. A girl can feel sad and regretful, and to me a girl's feelings are more important than a temporary nut pain.
perdix 29
Oh, man, you choked! Better you than her, I guess?
Draxanoth 15
I have dubbed thee, Sir.Floppy! You may now....rise...?
lulubelles 33
Convince? She should have sex with you when she wants to have sex with you, not be talked into it, that makes for a pretty bad time all round
Mister_Triangle 21
FML double standard #43: Girl wants sex but guy doesn't: "it's your job to satisfy her whenever she wants" Guy wants sex when girl doesn't: "respect her decision and wait until she wants to"
GingerNinja7 17
Come on OP, it's not that hard
RedPillSucks 31
I believe that was the problem (Yes, I know you were making a pun)
tj4234 35
Have sex for 16 months? Jesus you must have extreme stamina.
Jac_d_ipper 10
Either u r being sarcastic or a complete idiot!
perdix 29
#30, no, that is a great intentional misread. It makes you go back and re-read the original story and you can see how it could be interepreted the other way. The ability to do this shows great mental flexibility.
Lionesse 15
I think you need to re read the fml... But really? 16 months of sex? Common sense.. Duh.. Most people can't last longer than 2 minutes...
RedPillSucks 31
There's a lot of 2 minutes in 16 months. And yes, it's a cute misread.
tj4234 35
guys it was a joke, there was no punctuation so it could be read either way. idiots >.>
CharresBarkrey 15
Even WITH punctuation, it could be read either way. It's the wording that's wrong.