FML : Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my penis over my jeans and said "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML

196

Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my penis over my jeans and said "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By illequipt / Monday 16 March 2009 03:20 / Canada

Intimacy

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Top comments

By jackaaa | 0

#34500 - Monday 16 March 2009 12:02

Aww baby penis.

By Puolukka | 4

#34520 - Monday 16 March 2009 12:23

Maybe it was the first time for her to fool around with a guy like that period and she just didn't know what it's supposed to feel like/what it feels like when it's not hard?!

She obviously has never touched a penis before...because even if it was pretty small you can still tell if the guy is hard or not... o.O

Comments

By jackaaa | 0

#34500 - Monday 16 March 2009 12:02

Aww baby penis.

Etherial | 0

#333674 - Tuesday 23 June 2009 18:21

Baby penis trying to come out of shell.. Hahah XD

My boyfriend can wear briefs AND jeans..and I can tell just by looking if he's hard or not.

Poor OP.

brantzilch | 0

#875850 - Saturday 20 February 2010 17:11

haha

icall_BS | 0

#903442 - Monday 1 March 2010 7:09

Can you guys even picture that?
*puts hand on crotch and stares at OP* GET HARD FOR ME.

Hated_By_FML | 0

#972870 - Friday 2 April 2010 3:46

ydi for having a small dicc

AA357 | 0

#986338 - Wednesday 28 April 2010 21:10

Cause we all care about your huge bf.

mochalatte | 0

#986814 - Saturday 1 May 2010 1:57

if she loves you, she'll get over it, and quickly.

if she's a slut then forget it. and her.

luluk854ever | 0

#995599 - Sunday 16 May 2010 17:35

hah me too!

campbellshayla73 | 0

#1051991 - Thursday 1 July 2010 18:36

how does he desirve having a small penis it's sumthing you're born with no sumthin u can help

FantasticFin | 0

#1546776 - Thursday 14 October 2010 13:50

#124 ew, just ew. as if you would have a boyfriend. do us all a favour and change your picture!!

IpeeINtheBIGstal | 0

#1607789 - Wednesday 27 October 2010 1:28

what?!!

spiderwolf | 0

#2027769 - Monday 31 January 2011 5:21

yeah it is

FailBear920 | 19

#2253743 - Monday 28 March 2011 6:43

Your name is now Lil Wang!

ShadyFTW1 | 0

#2389808 - Friday 22 April 2011 21:55

why is there a fat cow in your picture 124?

yashr123 | 0

#2448931 - Tuesday 3 May 2011 2:50

why ..ur pro pic is the nastiest one in the world i no u dont have a bf which guy wuld be with u!

shizzle12 | 0

#2860491 - Sunday 10 July 2011 10:38

ahahahahahahahahahahahhahhahahah. baby penis.

xXCODGODXx | 11

#2943284 - Thursday 21 July 2011 6:35

good one 142

Edie84 | 0

#3425013 - Thursday 13 October 2011 5:38

Lmfao

madaoxsan | 9

#3573626 - Friday 11 November 2011 22:54

yeah...wtf..that's hardly funny.

that's his manhood she insulted.

I invite the female posters to think about if they were sleeping with a guy and he begun to penetrate her and was like "wait...am I inside you??! it feels like I'm just rubbing in between your thighs..."

Sorry OP.

julianna5782 | 12

#6410779 - Monday 14 September 2015 20:09

wait... she's a slut if she wants dick she can feel? would you stay with some loose ass girl?

By Knave | 0

#34515 - Monday 16 March 2009 12:17

pwned!

frank_b102 | 9

#5918154 - Friday 18 April 2014 11:36

Boned*

By loopy_fml | 0

#34518 - Monday 16 March 2009 12:20

teehee.

By Puolukka | 4

#34520 - Monday 16 March 2009 12:23

TWSSMoment | 0

#843557 - Thursday 11 February 2010 5:20

it pretty hard not to know when a guy is hard since it just stick up out of no where -.-

ContactSparrows | 0

#2063075 - Wednesday 9 February 2011 15:46

lol!!!!

Migole | 36

#4687662 - Saturday 14 July 2012 22:03

I thought about that too...Well, at least, when he's wearing jeans. I remember when I was younger and was lying on top of my first real boyfriend (fully dressed, we were just watching a movie) and I had never seen or touched his penis. When I moved I could feel it under my belly and thought it wasn't hard (when it actually was :P). No I can tell of course, but if you have no experience with that stuff it can be hard (no pun intended).

Scotth901 | 22

#6373082 - Thursday 6 August 2015 17:55

Lol that joke was flaccid?

By could_be_funny | 0

#34529 - Monday 16 March 2009 12:33

ouch that sucks...ditto #1

By Ldy_S_FTW | 0

#34536 - Monday 16 March 2009 12:42

O mannn, that made me L O L.

rockinbecca2 | 4

#3508894 - Saturday 29 October 2011 17:05

I know I'm a girl but u hot

AsianCookie247 | 14

#3544878 - Saturday 5 November 2011 11:29

^ and you're not.

By mai1808 | 0

#34560 - Monday 16 March 2009 13:08

haha. LOL

By lesb_lv | 0

#34561 - Monday 16 March 2009 13:09

agree with #4. Dont dump her. U might be her 1st....

By fish1806 | 0

#34562 - Monday 16 March 2009 13:10

ouch!!
life is hard, unlike your penis...

joce445 | 0

#1160326 - Friday 30 July 2010 7:25

this is the best comment ever

j355ika | 0

#3581652 - Sunday 13 November 2011 23:04

LOL FUNNY

nanaooze | 1

#3952698 - Friday 27 January 2012 22:07

Lol

By bigcrazymike | 6

#34572 - Monday 16 March 2009 13:30

"Get hard for me"?

LOL! That's a stupid thing to say! What did she expect you to do...flex it?

cosmo780 | 0

#2686223 - Wednesday 15 June 2011 14:30

guys can tense the blood flow in their dick making it more erect on cue or *flex* it

Nfabes1 | 5

#2718796 - Monday 20 June 2011 1:01

nasty

coughyochick | 7

#4724157 - Monday 23 July 2012 16:58

That's how the male body works. Are you 8?

xxDefiantxx | 0

#4822641 - Thursday 16 August 2012 19:57

156 Please explain how that works

DubstepMasta | 18

#5811734 - Tuesday 31 December 2014 19:40

I know what 156 is talking about, although that "flex" isnt easy to maintain doing,(i can do it for like a few seconds, not even) it doesnt have a real purpose, and i can do it while hard and not.