Love: Today, a white guy tried to teach me to use chopsticks properly.... - FML

By black_commet08 - 10/02/2010 05:11 - France

Today, a white guy tried to teach me to use chopsticks properly. I'm Chinese and have been using them since I could eat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 778

You deserved it 4 884

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Same thing different taste

I'm new to this, sorry

By Fifi - 01/09/2023 06:00

Today, I was eager to learn how to use chopsticks, as I was in a nice Chinese restaurant and had ordered noodles. As I was visibly struggling to eat, the server brought me a fork. When I reached for it, I flicked a noodle into a lady's soup at the next table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 301

You deserved it 432

By Killmenow - 30/08/2018 07:00 - United States

Today, I learned that my aunt, who lives with us, is using our chopsticks in her hair and putting them back in the utensil drawer without washing them. I'm the one that uses chopsticks the most. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 921

You deserved it 249

By ChickenBallsPlease - 28/01/2014 11:16 - United Kingdom - King's Lynn

Today, I was eating at a Chinese restaurant, when I stopped the waitress to tell her that even though I am of Chinese heritage, I can't understand a word of Chinese. After an awkward silence, she told me she was actually speaking English. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 582

You deserved it 16 652

By Asian - 07/02/2016 19:03 - United States - Clover

Today, I was asked to prove that I was Chinese by translating the phrase, "Ching chong ming chang ho". I'm not even Chinese. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 948

You deserved it 1 867

By forkmylife - 19/05/2011 22:57 - United States

Today, my school is having a mandatory class on etiquette. We've just now progressed onto forks after a long, tedious discussion on spoons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 193

You deserved it 4 420

By Anonymous - 19/09/2016 17:29 - Hong Kong - Central District

Today, at a tutoring center, one of the tutors looked at my worksheet and laughed. She then showed all the other tutors my mistakes and they laughed along with her. The best part? They all speak Chinese and they think I can't understand them. I'm Chinese. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 848

You deserved it 868

By mustabeendrugs - 14/10/2013 01:14 - United States - Tucson

Today, a customer called me "chink eyes", "dog eater", "bloody Chinese communist" and "ching chong." I'm black. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 283

You deserved it 3 719

By John_Elvis - 09/04/2016 03:30 - United States - Valparaiso

Today, I took a girl to a sushi restaurant for our first date. She insisted she's had sushi before, but I had to watch her struggle with the chopsticks for a few minutes before mercifully asking the waitress for a fork. She then ate a fork full of wasabi, thinking it was guacamole. I think there won't be a second date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 357

You deserved it 3 510

Food flight

By ashley_skillz06 - 24/01/2010 05:21 - France

Today, I went to a Japanese restaurant. While the chef was throwing food at us, I was getting ready for my turn. He tossed a piece of broccoli at me, I leaned back to catch it, completely falling off my chair. I knocked everything over and had the packed restaurant laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 360

You deserved it 7 403

By Anonymous - 10/06/2011 21:22 - United States

Today, my cousin taught me how to make dinner. My cousin is in first grade and I'm in college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 502

You deserved it 41 189

Next

Top comments

summerloolooloo 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 12:10

Poke his eyeball with it and tell him you know how to use them just fine.

CallMeHush 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 12:14

Can you catch a fly with them?

Comments

JakeH6363 3

Wednesday 10 February 2010 12:06

What a SPASTIC!!! D:

summerloolooloo 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 12:10

Poke his eyeball with it and tell him you know how to use them just fine.

Cthulu 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 14:47

It made me laugh...

LeoMaro 1

Monday 18 June 2012 19:01

Lolol. Don't worry about it. I'm the same way. Whenever I used chopsticks, I always use them different and my parents never corrected me. It's not our fault we were raised in American culture.

tom9686 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 12:11

harden up its called a fork its what us white people use

joshhh11 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 12:13

Your comment isn't wanted, now if you wouldn't mind, please **** off :)

summerloolooloo 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 15:14

Right back at you. ;)

Mustardnight 3

Wednesday 10 February 2010 15:59

Three is true for you too.

cowgod 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 1:02

no. OP should have taken it like the bitch he is. he's a disgrace to china.

PwnerJohn 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 9:56

^ ... the ****? maybe the white man does it wrong.

froggi_fml 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 12:11

this isn't really an fml... more like an f my day.

AngryNinja 1

Wednesday 10 February 2010 14:59

we need fmd posts and fml posts. a lot of fmls are only fmds.

serfis 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 19:09

ugh really? Jesus Christ. FML doesn't mean that your life is F'ed/ruined, it's just an expression.

Chuzza 2

Wednesday 10 February 2010 19:29

From the official FAQ: "Fmylife.com contains a daily dose of short anecdotes, based on a simple recipe: in a few sentences, users can tell everyone the shitty moment which ruined their day." Their DAY.

ElMundio87 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 12:12

you'd be surprised at the amount of people I see that hold their fork wrong, like a chimp

CallMeHush 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 12:14

Can you catch a fly with them?

gunnar7240 0

Monday 4 July 2011 7:19

that would be sweet.

athena3100 9

Friday 8 July 2011 10:06

Ahh Daniel son... one who can catch fly can acomplish anything. I love the karate kid.

winfieldALJD 6

Saturday 1 September 2012 23:57

Because of you can't, you're not using them properly.

s0l0d0l0 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 12:20

thats tru azn skills right there 8

Louis56_fml 0

Thursday 21 July 2011 0:32

U r a racist little kid now aren't ya?!

ElMundio87 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 12:21

damn 鬼佬

x_HELLo_tHERE_x 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 16:45

I know I'll sound very dumb for asking this, but oh well. What do those two symbols mean?

JFry 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 17:12

Shuo "Lao wai", shi bu shi??

velvel 7

Wednesday 10 February 2010 19:06

that's "gui lao", which is slang for white folks. used to be derogatory, but not so much anymore!

d_ele 0

Tuesday 16 November 2010 13:06

Haha dui a!!

vasidem 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 12:22

bahahahha funny (:

rider12 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 12:37

why would u not tell him to go away as if

Eddie_Paints 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 12:46

He's probably trying to fulfill some Anime fantasy he's been carrying around for a while!

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The Top

Today, after finally getting up the confidence, I started talking really dirty to my boyfriend on the phone. I was getting really onto it, and he seemed to enjoy it too. Then I stopped for a second to gauge his reaction. He was snoring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 872

You deserved it 4 683

Today, I got home from visiting my long-distance girlfriend. I spent $366 to get a plane ticket to visit her for the week. The day after I arrived there, she broke up with me and I had to buy a ticket for an earlier flight home. With fees and penalties, I paid around $550 to be broken up with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 711

You deserved it 5 223

The Top

Today, I put my paycheck in my wallet, intending to cash it in the next day. Later on, I met up with a friend and went to a party. I ended up getting so drunk, I gave away my $400 check in exchange for a pack of smokes, thinking it was a $5 bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 524

You deserved it 58 097

Today, while playing cards, with my dad, mom and sister, I excused myself to go to the bathroom several times just to secretly chat with my crush. I laughed so hard at a joke that I wet my pants. My family thinks I need to see a doctor because I was going to the bathroom so often between card games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 232

You deserved it 1 373

Today, my girlfriend won't have sex with me. Why? Because my Mii knocked out her Mii in Wii boxing. It wouldn't be as bad if she wasn't in one-player mode. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 944

You deserved it 4 896

Today, my class got baby dolls for the week to teach us how to be good parents. After school, I went to the store with my mom with the baby doll. When I got home, I realized that I left the baby doll in a shopping cart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 522

You deserved it 2 831

Today, a girl and her boyfriend dramatically left our group chat. One of her friends, a mod, is blaming me over a public exchange we had; he says it proves I "don't know her AT ALL." The crazy bitch called me every istaphobe in the book over not liking her favorite anime, and left because I told her to grow up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 397

You deserved it 123

Today, my boyfriend of three months texted me saying he loves me. I excitedly started texting back, "I love you too." Before I even got done, he messaged again saying, "Can you send a pic of your tits to me now?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 773

You deserved it 6 887