ohmy
Canada
Today, a spider crawled across my glasses' lens. My first reaction was to smack myself in the face. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Leave spiders to chill
Today, I saw a spider in my room. I got a piece of paper to try and put it outside. As I reached, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to smack where the spider was - my face. I fell on the floor disoriented. The spider got away. FML
Arthur B.
Adapt, improvise, overcome
Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when I looked up and saw a spider on my cheek. Panicking, I slapped myself in the face as hard as I could to kill it. Turns out the spider was on the mirror. FML
OuchImAMoron
This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff
Old Bridge, United States
Reflex
Today, I was cleaning a pocketknife when I noticed a spider on my leg. My first reaction was to stab it. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff
United States
Chance encounter
Today, my cat ran outside. As I ran around the side of my house to get her, I felt a gigantic spiderweb land on my face. I also felt a light thud on my eye and it started to tear up. I ran inside and looked in a mirror, the spider was in my eye. FML
baconandkittens
United States
Today, I was washing dishes when I picked up a plate and saw a huge spider. Trying to be nice, I took the plate outside and tried to gently push the spider off. The wind blew it into my eye. FML
spideypowers
United States
Today, as I was using my mom's computer, a spider crawled onto the screen. So as per my usual reaction to seeing a spider, I smashed it as fast as I could. I missed the spider, but now I have to buy my mom a new monitor. FML
spiderwoman
United Kingdom
Masterful gambit
Today, I saw a spider crawling across a poster in my bedroom, so I smacked the spot below it to scare the spider into climbing back up the wall. Instead, because the poster wasn't completely flat to the wall, I catapulted the spider straight into my face. FML
Anonymous
Warman, Canada
Juicy breakfast
Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML
Anonymous
Spider-man
Today, I tried to catch a spider in a glass. It was on the paper and I wanted it to fall into the glass, but I moved the paper the wrong way, screeched like a banshee and flung the glass at the floor. I was barefoot. FML
Top comments
dahlia14 0
coulda had a v8
pooley182 0
my god i laughed so hard, that mental image totally made my day.
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Comments (67)
Sahuro 2
That is perfectly normal. Try getting a concussion because you woke up with a daddy-long-leg on your forehead. Note to anyone: Only smack a spider against a wall if it's ALREADY THERE. And hand-to-hand is always preferred weapon =P
tocrazy5 0
shoulda had a v8 haha
pencilsupmynose 0
that's probably what I would do too
chicobear90210 0
lmao! good job smart one.
LadyGore 12
Sounds like something I'd do
Suaria 38
If this were to happen to me, I would freaking throw my glasses while screaming. Then I would wait until the spider went off my glasses before putting them back on. Or I would put on my contacts.
blackwidowtaco 31
Better work on your cat like reflexes there, op.
Wolfipoo 31
Hats off to you, but seriously, I would do that exact same thing, don't waste any time that could lead to it crawling into your face.