Today, a man came up to me and punched me in the face. He turned out to be the guy my ex-girlfriend cheated on me with. Apparently, she told him we broke up because I used to beat her. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I got beaten up by my ex-girlfriend's older brother who does mixed martial arts, because my ex saw me making out with another girl. We broke up over 6 months ago. FML
Today, my sister told me her ex-boyfriend abused her and I went to go confront him. Turns out, she lied because he dumped her after she cheated on him. I got my ass kicked. FML
Today, I found out my girlfriend of 3 years has been cheating on me. When I explained the situation to the "other guy", he exclaimed that I was lying because I was jealous and trying to ruin his relationship. He punched me in the face. FML
Today, I learned that my ex-boyfriend didn't cheat on me with my ex-best friend like he said. He just wanted an excuse to break up. To make matters worse, when I tried to talk to her, she slapped me and gave me a bloody nose. FML
Today, I confessed to cheating to my girlfriend. She decided to go up to the girl and ask her about it. The girl denied it and said she didn't even know me. My girlfriend walked up to me, called me a liar and punched me in the face. FML
Today, my girlfriend's ex punched me so hard in the face, I couldn't see straight. But I got up anyway. I lunged at him, and nailed him in the jaw. Turns out I'd in fact just knocked out my girlfriend the on-looker. FML
Today, some girl punched me in the face and left a huge purple bruise. Apparently, her boyfriend has been cheating on her with me, because she always sees him walking me home. Her boyfriend is my older brother, who didn't bother telling her who I was, because he "wanted to see what she would do." FML
Today I gently tried to break the news to my now ex-fiance's daughter that her Daddy and I weren't going to get married after all (he cheated), but that I still loved her with all my heart. She responded by punching me in the face. FML
Today, there was a knock at my door, and I was greeted by a punch to the face. The man was the extremely angry "fiancé" of the girl I've been married to for just over a year. FML
Today, I learned that the guy I was seeing had a girlfriend that he hid from me. I found this out when she attacked me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
cavalos94 0
What a...
Whammeh 0
As if cheating on you wasn't enough of an insult to you. Seems you'll be better off without her, she sounds like the personification of a grade A bitch.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (144)
FireSphinx 5
aww she didn't mean you "beat her", she meant to say you used to "pound her , hard" ;)
vicvic1997 0
exactly my point
some1azn 0
You should have seen the other guy.
some1azn 0
You should have seen the other guy.
susie_spiff 0
don't blame him. its her fault for lying to him. unless its true then ydi.
Magnimus 4
That's callled assault, and you either call the cops on him, or my preferred response, I demolish him. It's called self defense and completely justifiable. Last time I kicked someone's ass I actually pled guilty to it, and I only had to pay like a hundred dollar fine. Not even misdemeanor. Infraction. I would have taken it to trial if they hadn't pled it down to infraction; but I was losing too much time off work, so it was costing me too much money. Yes, he was fooled into it by your bitch ex-gf, but a sucker punch is not an honorable attack. He should have challenged you to it, and then it's mutual combat. That's how an honorable person deals with a problem. You could have done it in a private setting too. Without any interference. And you could have also maybe talked him out of it, if you didn't actually beat your gf. Because then you can ask him to look for any evidence of it. If she hasn't filed police reports, or gone to the hospital for the beatings, then he should realize she's lying, or he's a dumbass who just has an irrational dislike of you because you use to tap that, and then you beat his ass to a bloody pulp, or since he's the challenger, you have choice of weapons. I'd choose swords. I have a really good katana that would be what I'd use. Unfortunately, these kinds of cowardly people never duel, so I either beat their ass in the moment, or call the cops on them if they run.
johnnythreetears 2
WTF? I bet your a Trekkie that lives in your mommas house still. grow up. nobody "duels" anymore, not since the gun was invented. that shit is assault with a lethal weapon and sends your ass to jail for a hella long time. so grow up and think before you speak
AmandaJillx 6
some girls are seriously psychotic.
Jasonf6 0
You did charge him with assault and her with defamation right?
MemoriesOfOblivi 1
well... Did you?
HomeAl0ne 20
Ouch! At Scrabble! Owww! I used to beat her at Scrabble!!
jorrrk 0
hire a huge women to kick her teeth in