Today, I woke up to a burglar holding a gun. He yelled at me to get up so I did. He then paused and laughed. I was sleeping naked. FML
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By
ThatFatGuyBehind
| 3
How small was it for him to be laughing during a burgalery.
By
murdermastr
| 0
how did you post this FML if a burgalar was in your house today??
COMMENTS
By
enonymous
| 8
So who shot off first? you or the burglar?
By
ThatFatGuyBehind
| 3
How small was it for him to be laughing during a burgalery.
Reply
tencalories
| 3
you both have guns now but whose gonna shoot first
Reply
geko911
| 22
wellidk but OP has to crank up n load his gun while the burglers gun is already ready... OP doesnt stand a chance
Reply
thisusernamewast
| 0
66 that's kinky.
By
hellogoodbye1996
| 6
did he tell you to put clothes on?
Reply
ZoZo17_fml
| 0
probably, that way he could be serious enough to keep robbing you..
By
murdermastr
| 0
how did you post this FML if a burgalar was in your house today??
Reply
doubledee7
| 3
Very good question...How DID you?
Reply
that_is_Nathy
| 9
the burglar was gone already? he ran away to the house of a friend (naked hihi) and posted there`?
Reply
WiderWille
| 11
Maybehe askes the burglar to write the text for him?
Reply
SirEBC
| 7
Hey number #6, how did you post that comment if you were asleep last night?! The fuck?!?!
Reply
bigredmonkeybutt
| 24
It's that hard to figure out that every single FML posted here starts with the word "Today"? FYL for being dumb.
Reply
ZingDooper
| 0
you're stupid, this didn't happen today. It tale a dew weeks for Fmls to be posted
Reply
I agree with sirEBC. Just because this person was robbed today doesn't mean the burglar is STILL there.. OP obviously posted this after everything was done and over with
Reply
Epilepsy_fml
| 0
Guys. Fml requires that all posts start with "Today," and end with "FML". Dont question the authenticity unless you can show proof. And even then shut up. It doesn't matter.
Reply
kira1366
| 0
okay, not to mention the FML could be fake.
Reply
RedPillSucks
| 31
burglar: Get the F*k up!!! I'ma rob you!!!
OP: huh? wha...? Damn it man!!!!
burglar: Whoa fool. You got no clothes on!!!
burglar: Bwha ahahahahah ahah
OP; Can you hold on a minute? I need to post something on fmylife...
burglar: Dude, you spelt burglar wrong. It's not bugler. And remember to start with "Today"
OP: huh? wha...? Damn it man!!!!
burglar: Whoa fool. You got no clothes on!!!
burglar: Bwha ahahahahah ahah
OP; Can you hold on a minute? I need to post something on fmylife...
burglar: Dude, you spelt burglar wrong. It's not bugler. And remember to start with "Today"
Reply
example947
| 0
can no one spell burglar or burglary???
Reply
almighty_zer
| 5
all fmls start with "Today," so it could have happened to days ago but today he posts and keeps Today for the sake of the artistic factor.
By
abluekiwi
| 0
Lemme guess... Shrinkage? It's okay, you were scared.
Reply
awsm44
| 0
it was cold!
By
techweed
| 12
I would've thought he'd start jerking off
Reply
im_so_ninja
| 0
I like your picture :)
By
that_is_Nathy
| 9
Did he laugh because you are"mike oXSMALL"? Poor little mike...^^
It's not the size it's...a screw that: poor you for having a small one, but as long as it works...be lucky he didn't harm you (as you only whine about him laughing at you I assume he didn't)
It's not the size it's...a screw that: poor you for having a small one, but as long as it works...be lucky he didn't harm you (as you only whine about him laughing at you I assume he didn't)
Reply
WiderWille
| 11
Its not the size but...? The vibration function?
Reply
that_is_Nathy
| 9
...the techique (as said by owners of small ones and their girlfriends)
Reply
WiderWille
| 11
Oh man, man sollte meinen das du den Witz kennst wenn du schon aus deutschland kommst...
Reply
Silenthunter
| 0
kommen
Reply
bpell15
| 5
it's not the size of the boat... it's the motion of the ocean.
Reply
Tank_33
| 0
yeah but I sure as hell know ya can't make it to England in a row boat lol
By
BWill9014
| 4
Never understood how people could sleep naked by themselves...
Reply
doubledee7
| 3
Feels more comfortable for them...:)
Reply
abluekiwi
| 0
Try it. You will see.
Reply
bballforward33
| 10
EWWWW u fat ugly thing!!!!
Reply
ninjacutie
| 6
same it seems a little… gross to me!
Reply
Mach10
| 0
Dunno--Is it any more foolish than wearing a wool hat and hood indoors?
Reply
Ali_Br_fml
| 33
My cousin & her mom sleep in the same room, & my cousin sleeps nude during the summer. I sleep alone, & can't bring myself to do that... The least I wear is a bra & underwear... I usually keep on an undershirt too. I don't want to be robbed naked.
Reply
bpell15
| 5
well I know how they could.
step 1. they take of their cloths.
step 2. they get into bed alone with no cloths on.
the end.
step 1. they take of their cloths.
step 2. they get into bed alone with no cloths on.
the end.
Reply
cnastydawg
| 0
well if a guy came in and raped you it would make sense but if it was a guy... just put it this way how many gay robbers do you see going around?
Reply
jessyrodgers
| 0
you take your clothes off lay in bed and shut your eyes, pretty simple really
Reply
RedPillSucks
| 31
@99. People typically don't ask about sexual orientation while they're being robbed.
I suspect that there are about the same percentage of gay robbers as in the general population.
I'm not sure why you would think that gay people wouldn't rob anyone.
Maybe you're thinking of effeminate people?
I suspect that there are about the same percentage of gay robbers as in the general population.
I'm not sure why you would think that gay people wouldn't rob anyone.
Maybe you're thinking of effeminate people?
Reply
BWill9014
| 4
You're right 59... what in the hell was I thinking putting on clothes before I was about to leave the house... so foolish of me
Reply
Mach10
| 0
lawlz
I can see it perfectly:
Boots--check!
Gloves--check!
Wooly hat--check!
Hoodie--check!
Alright! I'm ready to go outside... Oh, shit! I forgot to pose for my FML Profile pic!!!
Is that how it went? Is that why you look so angry?
Hehehe... Relax man, just yanking your chain.
I can see it perfectly:
Boots--check!
Gloves--check!
Wooly hat--check!
Hoodie--check!
Alright! I'm ready to go outside... Oh, shit! I forgot to pose for my FML Profile pic!!!
Is that how it went? Is that why you look so angry?
Hehehe... Relax man, just yanking your chain.
By
charlybarly
| 0
awkward...
By
abluekiwi
| 0
That's right. Use your personal gun.