Today, a girl told me she couldn't text me anymore, because she was too tired and had to sleep. Over the next three hours, she updated her Facebook and Twitter accounts, and made a YouTube video of herself singing. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, this girl I liked made her Facebook status "Nobody texts me anymore, message me numbers?" I commented that I texted her. She deleted it and changed it to "Nobody that I care about texts me anymore, message me numbers?" FML
Today, the woman I have been seeing said she couldn't see a future with me. This was all because I didn't text her back when I fell asleep after working a double night/morning shift. FML
Today, I was doing my nightly check of my daughter's phone since a recent stint in the psych hospital, and saw that she had fallen into a peaceful sleep to watching videos on a website dedicated to watching people die. FML
Today, a girl on my Snapchat list posted a story asking for anybody who was awake to talk to her. Me being awake, I took her up on the request. Her response? "Sorry I didn't mean you." FML
Today, my girlfriend begged me to stay up late and video chat with her because she missed me. Even though I work early mornings, I reluctantly agreed. After waiting up until 2am for her to get online, I gave up. She had fallen asleep. FML
Today, I woke up to find my girlfriend not sleeping next to me. I go to my car and found a plethora of printed screenshots of me commenting things like, “So hot babe”, “Beautiful! I’d tap that” and other compliments on my female friends’ pictures on Facebook. My girlfriend’s not picking up her phone. FML
Today, at 1am, the girl of my dreams that I've been trying for over three years to date, finally asked me out via SMS. Too bad I was asleep at the time. She now thinks I've rejected her, and will no longer speak to me. FML
Today, I spent most of the day doing a project for school. When I finished, I got a call from my project partner. She couldn't finish her part because her internet didn't work. When I finally finished everything, I went on Facebook. She was on Facebook too. FML
Today, I sent a message on Facebook to a girl I really like. She replied, "..." It took me three hours to realize she'd actually written it. I thought it was just Facebook telling me she was typing. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend I was exhausted and wanted a nap. She decided to join me, then got bored and started watching Instagram reels blasting the same five seconds of some awful Cardi B "song." She got pissed when I asked her to stop. FML
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Top comments
njgohard 16
It's over...the fat bitch just sang
fejj13r 0
That has happened to me way to often. I'm sorry OP.
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Comments (180)
sea333 3
That's a little stalker-ish for you to know all that
wubbazugg 5
Two possibilities. A: she's kind of a bitch. B: (the more likely imo) you're a clingy kinda guy.
longtimesunshine 4
kind of creepy let her have some space... she was only politely sparing your feelings
alexlovescandy 3
Get the hint ;D
ThatDumbBitch 3
Creeper much?
OFF1C3RSLAT3R 4
Exactly what I was thinking. No wonder she doesn't wanna talk to him.
patacus 14
Aww. one time I had dinner plans with this girl. it was like 2 days before I turned 21. so it was kind of a birthday thing, but not really, anyways, so I had a night class. but after that I waited and waited. alone in the parking lot with unreturned calls and texts before I went home alone. she told me she fell asleep. she was posting on facebook the whole time. don't worry op. her loss.
jethrolee53 3
Stalker much?
Torres92 1
A bit creepy you follow all of her accounts...
sammieshortcake 15
My thoughts exactly!
sammieshortcake 15
Maybe that's because you're e-stalking her, broseph?? You checked her Facebook, Twitter, and obviously watched her YouTube video to see what it's about.
babydoll88 3
Someone doesn't like you.-.