Today, a girl asked me to check out her left breast, which she said she'd found a strange lump on. I'm an orthodontist. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I went to the doctor for a suspicious lump under my armpit, so he suggested a breast examination. While pressing all over them he said, "We're gonna have to send you for an X-ray because you have the most lumpy breasts I've ever felt in my life." FML
Today, I was on a first date at a bar, when a girl walks over and ask me if I'm a doctor. I said yes, thinking she overheard me talking about my PhD. The girl then showed me a lump on her breast and asked what to do about it. My date then slapped me and left. FML
Today, at the orthodontist, the nurse was checking my teeth. She asked me a question while her finger was in my mouth, and when I stupidly tried to reply, I bit her finger. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's because I could feel something solid in my breasts, and I wanted to get it checked, just to be safe. Turns out it was my ribs. Oops. FML
Today, while my orthodontist was working on my teeth, she made the comment, "Wow! It looks like a murder scene in there!" FML
Today, I was at the dentist's. During my check-up, he recommended a dermatologist. FML
Today, I got my lip pierced. By the orthodontist. FML
Today, I have an orthodontist's appointment, and I told my best friend that I was going to get my teeth fixed. She replied, "Wow, thanks. Your smile's really awful to have to look at." FML
Today, I was giving myself a breast exam for lumps. I heard laughing, looked around and saw that the 12 year-old neighbor and his friends were watching through the window. FML
Today, I felt a painful lump on my jaw. After going on Google, I was convinced I either had an infected tooth or jaw cancer. In a panic, I rushed to the dentist and told the receptionist the problem. She pulled the dentist from an appointment, and he felt around my jaw. It was just a pimple. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
MELKOZAR 27
Sheesh! Don't complain!
19990231 29
Maybe she just wanted you to look at her breast.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (94)
Grenith 21
Pretty sure this is how **** starts.
vikky538 29
did you see any bite marks...
Matttis 7
Send her to me if she's over 18. I'll give her a second opinion ;D
Delsanity 13
Lol why you complain!?
False_Stupidity 42
... and her phone number.
Capriciousfox 27
And social security number
jdeink1 3
This is how a lot of pornos start
ImAFaker 29
And her password to Netflix
thatguythat 9
Was she hot?
youngsofly 13
Boobs... no need for the gender, still boobs.