Intimacy: Today, a cute guy in a bar came up to me, and we started chatting....

By Anonymous - 16/08/2011 03:31 - United States

Today, a cute guy in a bar came up to me, and we started chatting. I'm a natural blonde, and he commented on how nice my hair was. He then followed this up with, "Does the carpet match the curtains?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 768

You deserved it 5 195

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Same thing different taste

By kklaucen14 - 06/08/2012 01:15 - United States - Connersville

Today, my boyfriend and I went to a party. He got drunk and started talking about how his hot blonde girlfriend gives him great blowjobs. I'm a brunette. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 114

You deserved it 3 274

How to make it awkward for everyone

By Anonymous - 09/08/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, I got a haircut at a fancy salon and made small talk with the stylist. While she washed my hair, I said, “Wow, this is better than my girlfriend does it.” She replied, “That’s because I’m a professional. Also, I’m your girlfriend’s cousin.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 105

You deserved it 454

Get it on

By brunetteshavemorefun - 22/12/2012 17:56 - United Kingdom - Burnley

Today, I dyed my naturally-blonde hair dark brown. Upon seeing me, my boyfriend immediately wanted to have sex, because I now remind him of his favourite porn star. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 026

You deserved it 15 174

By Anonymous - 07/03/2013 03:14 - United States - Fort Worth

Today, I met a guy in a bar. He was sweet and funny so I asked him out for coffee later. He quickly turned me down, saying that I didn't even meet his first requirement. His first requirement was "looks like a girl." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 398

You deserved it 4 427

I'm looking through you

By lesler - 20/07/2021 06:01 - Canada

Today, my bartender noticed my new haircut before my live-in boyfriend did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 930

You deserved it 220

How're you doing?

By figcurzyez - 23/05/2016 15:57 - United Kingdom - Harlow

Today, the checkout guy at my local store asked me if I had my hair cut. I answered and started talking about my hair, and he gave me a really weird look. He was talking to his friend, who I hadn't noticed in the queue behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 038

You deserved it 2 346

By Anonymous - 23/11/2014 01:33 - United States - Chicago

Today, I was at a club and caught a cute guy's eye from across the bar. He smiled at me, got up and came over, then said "Oh shit! You looked way hotter from back there. Damn!" and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 045

You deserved it 3 585

Having multiple jobs may have its benefits

By Scoudrel - 26/02/2021 17:01

Today, I flirted with the cashier at the local bagel joint. I complimented her unique blue hair and got her number. Later on that evening, she served my girlfriend and me our food at a different restaurant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 283

You deserved it 6 410

By Brunette, small breasts - 24/07/2016 18:51 - Romania - Campina

Today, I decided to finally talk to my crush. I said, "Hello" to which he replied, "First, dye your hair blonde and grow some boobs, then we can talk business." FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 054

You deserved it 1 412

Face the facts

By ugly - 15/04/2011 06:43 - Australia

Today, I was at the hairdresser's getting a trim. The lady doing my hair commented on how beautiful and luscious my hair was, which made me feel really good. I later overheard her telling her colleague that hair as nice as mine was wasted on someone with a face like mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 067

You deserved it 3 379

gyoopiy 0

Tuesday 16 August 2011 8:35

Does it?

jswizzle_ 6

Tuesday 16 August 2011 8:36

Now you have left us all wondering.

Comments

emerluvsu 6

Tuesday 16 August 2011 22:19

I hope yu slapped him.

marialuna101 0

Tuesday 16 August 2011 22:38

I don't get it :/

texas_redneck88 10

Wednesday 17 August 2011 6:17

please tell me you're not bein' serious

marialuna101 0

Thursday 18 August 2011 10:09

I don't :/

ashhxoxo 14

Tuesday 16 August 2011 22:44

What a tard. Doesn't he know it's drapes???

theschmidt108 0

Tuesday 16 August 2011 23:16

lol did you show him!

decidedlyvague 11

Tuesday 16 August 2011 23:58

LOOOOOOL! Sounds like a real classy fellow.

IceCreamMage 17

Wednesday 17 August 2011 0:18

Why do people even post these as FMLs? They aren't even that bad. "oh noes, he asked something personal and I'll probably never see him again! Q.Q" -sigh-

Toesif 0

Wednesday 17 August 2011 0:21

Yea does it?

HomeAl0ne 20

Wednesday 17 August 2011 0:22

Hey, I should try this! I normally just walk up and ask if they have any nude pics of themselves, but that's not working out so well. You wouldn't believe the amount of time I waste standing around while they fish through their handbags looking for them.