By Anonymous - United States Today, a drunk driver drove his car through my mailbox. He got pissed, started yelling, and threatened to sue me for "putting the mailbox in the middle of the road". If my front lawn is a road, I'm going to have some serious issues. FML I agree, your life sucks 45297 You deserved it 2736 66 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United Kingdom Today, I overheard my mum tell my sister that she should make me a bridesmaid at her wedding. My sister scoffed, "She looks like Shamu, mum. I can't have THAT in my wedding pics." followed by laughter and my mum saying, "Touché." FML I agree, your life sucks 53861 You deserved it 6752 147 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By JayBausch - United States Today, I went to retrieve my sneakers that my wife made me leave outside the door of our hotel room. Somebody had shat in one of them. FML I agree, your life sucks 51648 You deserved it 7040 138 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By lurna301 - United States - Glendale Today, my boyfriend's mother introduced me as his "friend". We've been together for 10 years. FML I agree, your life sucks 31632 You deserved it 3248 179 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, at work, a homeless woman called me trash, threw her coffee at me, and told me to get a job. I do have a job. It's homeless outreach. FML I agree, your life sucks 33366 You deserved it 3303 83 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I met my boyfriends mother for the first time and hoped to make a good first impression. When I tried to say 'Hello', a loud rippling burp comes up from my throat. And not only that. A small chunk of mucus flies out and lands on the floor between us. So much for a good first impression. FML I agree, your life sucks 29888 You deserved it 5802 51 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By cereal stepper Today, I got out of my bed and immediately stepped into a half-eaten bowl of cereal. FML I agree, your life sucks 7646 You deserved it 5423 23 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By criley - United States - Los Angeles Today, an attractive guy approached me and struck up a conversation. He was friendly and sweet, and gave me his number. As I walked away, my first thought was that someone had played a cruel joke on me. I've had such awful relationships that I can't recognize when someone is actually being sincere. FML I agree, your life sucks 49627 You deserved it 6504 74 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By SoDamnBroke - South Africa Today, I secured a tender for my boss, earning her 1/4 million in profits. Today is also meant to be pay-day for us, but my boss is too busy dealing with the tender to pay her employees. So essentially, I made my boss rich while remaining broke and in debt. FML I agree, your life sucks 12565 You deserved it 936 19 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By tryingtostealmyheart Today, a total stranger asked me to marry him while we were waiting for the bus. I turned him down. He then pulled a knife on me, grabbed my purse and ran. FML I agree, your life sucks 24061 You deserved it 1638 41 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Downey Today, my bathroom flooded. I frantically cleaned my apartment as fast as I could before the plumber arrived. Everything was finally clean when I let him in. It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower. There's no way he didn't notice. FML I agree, your life sucks 30797 You deserved it 58668 160 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I was going to ask my parents for advice on how to get my ex-girlfriend back. I overheard them talking about how glad they were that their plan to break us up worked so well. I don't think I should ask for advice anymore. FML I agree, your life sucks 36431 You deserved it 2671 54 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By sparklethelette - United States Today, I put a blue toilet cleaner square in the back of toilet. My fiancé called me later on freaking out because he couldn't get the "blue water to go away" when he flushed. FML I agree, your life sucks 27942 You deserved it 3478 86 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By innocentbarista - United States - Los Angeles Today, while serving two middle-aged women at the coffee shop, I was screamed at and accused of being a "sexist and chauvinistic bastard." This was prompted by me charging one of them 40 cents for the addition of steamed milk, which is clearly stated on the price sheet. FML I agree, your life sucks 34442 You deserved it 2565 76 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By thatssickkk - United States Today, my grandmother decided to tell me about her past as a prostitute. In full detail. FML I agree, your life sucks 27386 You deserved it 2698 114 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United Kingdom - Nottingham Today, my husband of 3 weeks told me he doesn't want to be married anymore because I suggested getting a joint bank account. FML I agree, your life sucks 31712 You deserved it 4415 119 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I went to visit my grandmother. My grandfather recently died, so I had gotten her a cat for comfort. Turns out in her sadness, she had forgotten about the cat. I found its remains being eaten by ants and birds. FML I agree, your life sucks 1812 You deserved it 401 14 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By SadDaenerys Today, my boyfriend of two years broke up with me because I finished the Game of Thrones books before he could finish the TV show. FML I agree, your life sucks 13343 You deserved it 1380 50 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Ben - United States Today, I was talking this pretty religious girl that I like. We were playing a game and I asked her if she could go back in history and meet anyone who would it be. She said Jesus. Without thinking I said "I mean someone that was real." FML I agree, your life sucks 20225 You deserved it 47600 253 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Sad guy - 8/1/2021 20:01 - United States - Baltimore Brotherly love Today, I felt so lonely that I was almost jealous of the way Chris Cuomo and Don Lemon playfully express affection for each other on CNN. FML I agree, your life sucks 586 You deserved it 192 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Achoo - United States Today, I was making out with a guy I really like. Midway through, he stopped and said he had to sneeze. After waiting several seconds, he said the urge went away and we kept making out. Ten seconds later, he violently sneezed in my open mouth. FML I agree, your life sucks 38810 You deserved it 5103 57 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Shortcake - Canada - Pitt Meadows Today, what started as my mom calling my grandma for a recipe turned into them discussing the philosophical reason behind my baking. I apparently picked up baking because I'm depressed over unemployment. And here I thought I just liked the smell of baked goods. FML I agree, your life sucks 22081 You deserved it 2007 41 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By skid kid - Canada Today, I angrily tweeted about having fruitlessly searched for over an hour for my car keys. Minutes later, some guy told me to check beneath the "stack of skid-marked underwear" on my bedroom floor. I'm not sure if it was a lucky guess, or if I should start carrying mace. FML I agree, your life sucks 28773 You deserved it 6578 174 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By whoahshloann - United States Today, I was watching Harry Potter. When all the students at Hogwarts started to clap at one point, I started clapping myself. FML I agree, your life sucks 23827 You deserved it 53955 311 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By happybirthday - United Kingdom Today, it's my birthday. My girlfriend gave me a Paul Frank t-shirt. It says "I'm single." FML I agree, your life sucks 34536 You deserved it 2848 112 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By lopez - France Today, I needed to go to the toilet. Thinking that everyone had left work, I decided that, since I AM a Jedi, my penis ought to be my lightsaber. All of a sudden I hear a familiar voice: "At least someone is having fun!" It was my boss. FML I agree, your life sucks 10004 You deserved it 34955 75 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By SF49 - United States Dingdong Today, my girlfriend came back from visiting her family. She'd forgotten to take her pills, and decided to "catch up" by taking almost a week's worth of birth control and prescription pills. She's fine, but I had to convince the ER staff that she's not suicidal, just stupid. FML I agree, your life sucks 44765 You deserved it 3736 62 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By paintfarts1976 - Ireland - Mullingar Today, my husband angrily accused me of cheating on him. It turns out he thinks that because I've been spending time with my brother recently, the two of us must be having some kind of incestuous affair. FML I agree, your life sucks 55000 You deserved it 4213 113 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Nothanks Today, at the healthy age of 26, I broke my hip during sex. FML I agree, your life sucks 16068 You deserved it 1344 76 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ouchy - United States Today, I was babysitting three little kids. I decided to give one of them (a seven-year-old) a piggy-back ride, thinking I'm strong enough. I managed to get a few feet before faceplanting on the wooden floor. She is fine though, no pain or anything. My face took the impact for both of us. FML I agree, your life sucks 11139 You deserved it 26755 64 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous Today, my girlfriend dumped me. Not for cheating or for flirting, but because I wear tighty whities. FML I agree, your life sucks 34146 You deserved it 22773 130 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By climber Today, after climbing 8 flight of stairs due to electricity outage, I got to work only to find the office locked. FML I agree, your life sucks 4186 You deserved it 356 10 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous Zing! Today, I overheard my wife and teenage daughter arguing. My wife was complaining that our daughter is unappreciative. "You should thank me for giving you life," she said. My daughter snapped, "I thank God for that, not you." My wife sighed and said, "He didn't have to sleep with your father." FML I agree, your life sucks 1829 You deserved it 193 10 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By fish killer - United States Today, my sister presented me with an "official pet killer" award after yet another goldfish under my care died of unknown causes. FML I agree, your life sucks 27682 You deserved it 10042 204 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Phycheledic - United States Today, I was volunteering at the daycare in my area. When this one kid was leaving, he asked his mom, "Why is she so ugly?" FML I agree, your life sucks 14434 You deserved it 1574 30 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By 23yearoldtoddler - United States Today, I was jumped and savagely beaten to the ground by a group of six-year-olds wearing Disney princess masks. FML I agree, your life sucks 26486 You deserved it 6559 161 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By simple living - United States - Austin Today, my dog threw up on the tiled floor. I found out at 6 this morning in the dark when I slipped and fell in it. FML I agree, your life sucks 30794 You deserved it 2659 65 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Tulsa Today, I enjoyed a romantic evening at home with my husband while a babysitter took care of my 5-year-old daughter. After she came home, she told me the sitter let her use her "weird swing." I wasn't too worried, until she said it was indoors, and I realized she was describing a sex swing. FML I agree, your life sucks 42670 You deserved it 4429 104 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous Today, a really pretty girl came into my work, but when I went up to help her, my brain misfired and I accidentally said, "How can I hump you?" She yelled at me, and my manager put me on probation. FML I agree, your life sucks 774 You deserved it 1956 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Mountain View Today, at a public restroom, I caught my extremely eco-friendly daughter, who was on her period, looking through the trash. When I asked why, she said, "Because I'm looking for pads to use. It'll mean less garbage." I then had to lecture her in the public restroom about health and hygiene. FML I agree, your life sucks 27388 You deserved it 2585 132 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By real life problems | 26 #7700469 - Friday 28 September 2018 1:13 Poor dog. Is this what it feels like to wear those $530 dollar homeless shoes? Send a private message 3 0 Reply
By abigiggles | 38 #7700896 - Friday 28 September 2018 20:01 Also to help not burn their poor paws on the black asphalt. Send a private message 2 0 Reply
By real life problems | 26 #7700469 - Friday 28 September 2018 1:13 Poor dog. Is this what it feels like to wear those $530 dollar homeless shoes? Send a private message 3 0 Reply
By onceuponatime456 | 16 #7700783 - Friday 28 September 2018 17:10 Only a complete effin i*iot would put shows on a dog! She needs to be charged with animal cruelty! Send a private message 0 5 Reply
Reply EmikoShiriyuki | 26 #7700878 - Friday 28 September 2018 19:22 It's to protect the pads of their paws from freezing in the winter and from the harsh salt that is put down to melt snow, it can cause their paws to dry out and crack. Send a private message 2 0 Reply
Reply abigiggles | 38 #7700896 - Friday 28 September 2018 20:01 Also to help not burn their poor paws on the black asphalt. Send a private message 2 0 Reply
Today, I found out my husband was cheating on me while I was waiting in an ICU waiting room while he was getting brain surgery. FML I agree, your life sucks 94 You deserved it 4 2 Comments
Today, I went back home after a break with my live-in boyfriend. I had to spend some time at my distant father's place in another city until we talked... I agree, your life sucks 276 You deserved it 50 5 Comments
Is this what it feels like to wear those $530 dollar homeless shoes?