yummy
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Terminology
Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
London, United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
Nice outing
Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML
It was clean at least
🌶️ Spicy
Pushed it too far
Today, as we were getting ready for sex, I told my man to fuck my face, and it was great until he shoved my face in his ass, yelling, "Eat my ass! Eat it!" I had to explain that ass eating is not something I'm comfortable with. FML
Zibby
🌶️ Spicy
Life hacks
Today, I found out that applying toothpaste to your penis to make it taste good for your girlfriend is not a good idea. FML
future brain bleach addict
Victoria, Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML
Anonymous
Jacksonville, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Fake it til you make it
Today, I learned that I don’t need to fake my orgasms, even though I’ve never been given one. FML
Anonymous
Rockwall, United States 🌶️ Spicy
User notice
Today, I had to slowly explain to my brother that spooning has nothing to do with using a spoon to clean out a woman's vagina after sex. FML
Anonymous
Gloucester, United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
First time
Today, I had sex for the first time. I realised that I was more satisfied by last night's dinner. FML
Anonymous
Australia 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I found out that my boyfriend isn't gay. Apparently, I just give good head. FML
datingmrpicky
United States 🌶️ Spicy
How could you?
Today, my boyfriend told me he wouldn't have sex with me because yesterday I ate a sandwich in his bed and got crumbs in it. FML
esb
Canada 🌶️ Spicy
No kinkshaming, but come on…
Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "Eat it, eat it!" FML
Top comments
Fuzzygraywolf 0
a wee bit behind on the learning curve are we? lol
Lexiesoccerchick 0
wooow, you fail.
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Comments (450)
camoney 4
well OP hope no one asks you to "toss the salad", might be another surprise for you
ugliness 6
I don't understand that one
T3P33_fml 0
toss the salad: To perform the act of eating out an asshole, usually in prison, with either jelly or syrup. Urban Dictionnary.
fxninja 0
dumb ****
sea333 3
wow really? how old are you?
WildInTheStreets 5
it all depends on your age. if you're a teenager you fail at life.
rofflewaffle 9
F your girlfriend's life?
xMissxMurderx 1
epic fail.
adamo_erebus 26
"I'd love to eat you out for dinner!"
Dodge4x4Ram 46
haha yeah
jared280zx 0
it doesn't?!?!?
chui281 0
FAILURE AT LIFE!
B3Y0ND 3
And now you know.... but knowing is half the battle... G.I JOE!
PandaFlavoured 0
-squeals- RAINBOW DASH~~!! Okay I'm done lol.
Wandering_Ninja 8
56 I ******* love you
Omgitsaireyonna 6
Hahahahahaha!