FML : Today, I felt some serious gas building up while at the supermarket. I tried to quietly fart it out, only to end up sharting myself. I had to frantically...

Today, I felt some serious gas building up while at the supermarket. I tried to quietly fart it out, only to end up sharting myself. I had to frantically waddle out of the store as discreetly as possible as several people in the vicinity freaked out and tried to locate the source of the smell. FML

I agree, your life sucks

You deserved it

By Anonymous / Friday 17 July 2015 17:14 / United States - West Palm Beach

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Top comments

By people_annoy_me | 23

#6353669 - Saturday 18 July 2015 8:26

What a bad shituation you're in.

By SpartyOnWayne | 18

#6353703 - Saturday 18 July 2015 8:41

Love is like a fart: if you have to force it, it's probably shit

Comments

By lexiieeex3 | 32

#6353666 - Saturday 18 July 2015 8:25

Oh no! Hopefully you were able to get changed safely. Best of luck.

tarlax | 11

#6353738 - Saturday 18 July 2015 9:27

Changed "safely"? I don't think the shit was in danger of exploding or anything. It's a shart, not a fertilizer bomb.

sturschaedel | 27

#6353744 - Saturday 18 July 2015 9:30

20, as a mother, let me tell you: There are not many things more destructive than a diaper blowout. Never underestimate the force of shit.

lexiieeex3 | 32

#6353841 - Saturday 18 July 2015 14:30

20- Sometimes it can go through your pants and stain your clothes. As a special Ed teacher, I've seen it all. And there's nothing worse when you can't do anything about it. Safely was most definitely the correct word.

By people_annoy_me | 23

#6353669 - Saturday 18 July 2015 8:26

What a bad shituation you're in.

Amama_fml | 30

#6354107 - Saturday 18 July 2015 21:35

I think this is the first "shit" pun I've seen that is not down voted. I'm impressed.

MrBlackledge | 12

#6354333 - Sunday 19 July 2015 3:27

If only I could thumbs up you more

By mds9986 | 24

#6353676 - Saturday 18 July 2015 8:27

That stinks what a shitty situation.

terspal | 14

#6353720 - Saturday 18 July 2015 9:01

What a craptacular pun.

nfedrichy | 20

#6353812 - Saturday 18 July 2015 13:19

I thought it was fartastic

MyNameIsLaughter | 18

#6353814 - Saturday 18 July 2015 13:22

You guys please stop!
We are so much better than this!

Indiantrolledd | 16

#6353887 - Saturday 18 July 2015 15:19

Lol fuck you all, these puns are great.

By ChristianH39 | 30

#6353677 - Saturday 18 July 2015 8:28

Never trust a fart.

oliv34 | 11

#6357542 - Wednesday 22 July 2015 7:20

Never waste an erection

By sweetbliss3 | 37

#6353682 - Saturday 18 July 2015 8:30

how horrible. hopefully you got it taken care of quickly.

By Koolaidandtacos | 21

#6353683 - Saturday 18 July 2015 8:30

Sneaky with a splash of sh*t

mswhatever | 18

#6354130 - Saturday 18 July 2015 22:02

You can say shit. This is Fuck My Life. See shit. We are adults here. We can swear.

By hard_candy | 25

#6353697 - Saturday 18 July 2015 8:36

amateur. everyone knows you don't force a fart too hard.

By SpartyOnWayne | 18

#6353703 - Saturday 18 July 2015 8:41

Love is like a fart: if you have to force it, it's probably shit

CrazedGunner | 22

#6355339 - Monday 20 July 2015 0:47

Damn right.

By WOTAN1488 | 24

#6353704 - Saturday 18 July 2015 8:41

Sounds like a...crappy circumstance...

RedPillSucks | 31

#6353872 - Saturday 18 July 2015 14:59

crapinstance?

By MrConcise | 34

#6353706 - Saturday 18 July 2015 8:45

The worst is the car ride back if you don't have a change of clothes in the trunk. You're trying to sit in your seat as much as possible without actually touching it, and still trying to push the gas pedal in a half-sitting-half-standing position.

sturschaedel | 27

#6353735 - Saturday 18 July 2015 9:20

You seam to have quite a lot of experience in that matter.

MrConcise | 34

#6353740 - Saturday 18 July 2015 9:28

Let's just say I'm allergic to eggs and it took a lot of pairs of pants to figure it out. lmao

whitnayfortooh | 29

#6353926 - Saturday 18 July 2015 17:15

and what if he didn't even have a car, he took the bus. he had to walk half a mile to the bus stop and wait 30 min for it. and he had to take 3 buses to get there. the horror!