Miscellaneous: Rude awakening

Rude awakening

By blackcat37 - 28/09/2013 10:53 - United States - Independence

Today, at 6 in the morning, I sneezed so hard I fell off my bed. I guess I'm up for the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 612

You deserved it 4 912

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Same thing different taste

By HWS - 15/04/2011 05:47 - Canada

Today, I sneezed so hard I fell down the stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 280

You deserved it 7 775

By Anonymous - 01/10/2011 11:44 - Sweden

Today, I sneezed so hard that I hit my head against the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 201

You deserved it 6 101

Faulty plumbing

By Anonymous - 08/02/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, after just waking up, I sneezed, which caused me to piss myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 427

You deserved it 97

By Anonymous - 19/09/2015 18:58 - United States - San Marcos

Today, I sneezed so hard that I re-dislocated my shoulder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 911

You deserved it 1 813

By TooYoungForThis - 30/06/2013 04:36 - Canada

Today, I sneezed so hard that I threw my back out. Now my back is in agonizing pain, and I can barely walk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 151

You deserved it 4 985

By Anonymous - 25/09/2010 02:35 - United States

Today, I had a cold and was vomiting. I sneezed really hard, smacking my nose onto the toilet seat. I woke up a few minutes later with my nose bleeding, painful, and still stuffy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 137

You deserved it 2 817

Earthquake sneezer

By Noname - 27/01/2009 00:02 - Japan

Today, I sneezed so hard I herniated my back. After passing out from the pain I awoke on the floor covered in my own shit and piss. Unable to move, I had to wait in this state for four hours for my wife to return home from work, clean me up and take me to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 767

You deserved it 2 825

Go big or go home

By kinwar - 27/09/2021 07:01 - United States - Hamburg

Today, I sneezed and peed myself while working out at the gym. FML

I agree, your life sucks 899

You deserved it 120

By kissrocks4 - 11/04/2012 07:04 - United States - Sacramento

Today, I got whiplash from sneezing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 444

You deserved it 3 163

By Anonymous - 01/02/2010 19:29 - United Kingdom

Today, I was giving a class presentation, when I suddenly sneezed so hard I wet myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 881

You deserved it 4 112

rushgirl25 6

Saturday 28 September 2013 16:04

I lol'ed so hard at this! Sorry op :-(

stariee1997 16

Saturday 28 September 2013 16:07

At least you woke up to 1/8th of an ******?

Comments

jimmywithsalt 19

Tuesday 1 October 2013 3:34

Honestly, that is hilarious and kind of awesome.

xPrinceofDeathx 5

Tuesday 1 October 2013 3:42

But... This was written at 5:33

worldclassrager 39

Wednesday 9 July 2014 11:33

Trying to blow something off? Like maybe your socks?

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Health Awkward Jewelry Kids Fight Family Love Work Relatable Students Noise Birds Animals Sleep Mental health Medication Contraception Racism Pregnancy Relationship advice Cheating Teenagers Friends Sex Intimacy Embarrassing Revenge Food Boredom

The Top

Today, and every time I try to talk to my mother about being a lesbian, she just says in the most condescending way, "Oh no you're not sweetie, it’s just a phase." The "phase" has lasted 17 years, including marrying my wife and adopting twin sons, but sure, it’s “just a phase.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 730

You deserved it 229

Today, I went looking for a childhood doll - I remembered that my mum kept her in her bedside cabinet. I could see the doll at the back, but there was stuff in the way, so I reached in and took some of it out, only to find I was holding one of my mum's toys… a big black rubber cock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 225

You deserved it 6 962

The Top

Today, one of the guys I work with ran his finger down the back of my shirt and said, "Just checking to see if you're wearing a bra today". FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 290

You deserved it 3 188

Today, my five year old niece decided to wake me up by shoving blasting earphones in my ears. Five hours later I can still hear Justin Bieber shrieking "Baby". FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 426

You deserved it 5 338

Today, I found out the hard way that I'm the "lucky" type of woman who can experience intense orgasms in certain positions: in the middle of group yoga. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 790

You deserved it 7 513

Today, I noticed a disgusting odor that seemed to be radiating off my brother. When I asked him about it, he replied, "I think it's ball sweat. I haven't had a shower in a few weeks, so it's hard to tell." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 318

You deserved it 4 128

Today, I had to explain to my husband why saving the condom from the first time we had sex is not romantic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 242

You deserved it 6 673

Today, I got in trouble at work because the person whom I trained, and had done everything correctly with no mistakes, and said he was comfortable being on his own when I asked, was screwing it all up over the course of 6 weeks. When I asked him, he said, "I think my way is better than yours." FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 982

You deserved it 886