Love, Intimacy, Sex, Relatable and Awkward: Protip

Protip

By Herman - 13/02/2023 06:00 - United States - Bedford

Today, I went to my room to find my girlfriend on the floor, butt up, with her pants down. I elatedly took the invitation and dropped my pants too, only for her to tell me, "Not so fast champ, I'm trying to force some farts out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 093

You deserved it 473

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Same thing different taste

By ThisIsMyLife - 04/06/2017 04:00

Today, while naked, my fiancée said there was something wrong with her butt. She turned around and I leaned in to look at it. She then farted in my face. On purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 561

You deserved it 1 618

By Gas-pingForAir - 19/09/2016 08:59 - United States - Columbia

Today, my girlfriend managed to trap a fart in her nightgown and carry it all the way from the bathroom, into our bedroom, and finally into our bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 788

You deserved it 1 670

By needsnewshorts - 16/07/2013 01:42 - United States - San Clemente

Today, my girlfriend was sitting on my lap at a birthday party. She thought it would be funny to fart. I came instantly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 513

You deserved it 23 663

Gross out competition

By shattysituation - 31/12/2012 22:36 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 431

You deserved it 4 058

Nice outing

By Anonymous - 07/12/2019 05:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 420

You deserved it 761

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 09:53 - France

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 112

You deserved it 41 514

By CHStennis_4 - 03/09/2011 04:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 312

You deserved it 3 866

By ass slap - 11/08/2013 15:35 - United States - Broomall

Today, while I was hanging out with a cute girl, I slapped her ass playfully. She told me that she was going to get me back. She slapped my ass later that night unexpectedly while I was holding in a huge fart... It came out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 228

You deserved it 24 832

By USSEYL - 26/11/2008 04:43 - United Kingdom

Today, I was performing the classic 69 position with my girlfriend. I wasn't able to control it : I farted right into her nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 091

You deserved it 27 485

Ouch!

By P0wned - 29/09/2009 21:21 - France

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 982

You deserved it 5 274

spinningrecords 14

Monday 13 February 2023 14:09

Not gonna lie, I would have done the same thing. It is disappointing to get that reaction though.

JackWood 20

Monday 13 February 2023 16:01

He could offer to lend a hand or something to help her relax and squeeze them out.

Comments

spinningrecords 14

Monday 13 February 2023 14:09

Not gonna lie, I would have done the same thing. It is disappointing to get that reaction though.

JackWood 20

Monday 13 February 2023 16:01

He could offer to lend a hand or something to help her relax and squeeze them out.

Vesi 29

Monday 13 February 2023 18:50

My only question is.. Why pants down? Passing gas should only be air..

GreyFox78 2

Monday 17 April 2023 2:53

Maybe she was being careful, just in case she had to shart.

RichardPencil 30

Monday 13 February 2023 22:40

So if you put it in and she farted, would that count as a *******? I'm sure it's in Urban Dictionary somewhere. If not, there's your entry...in a manner of speaking.

BurnInDemonFire 34

Friday 17 February 2023 16:54

"Today, I caught my girlfriend doing pantsless yoga "trying to force some farts out". I mistook it as an invitation for some sexy time. Today, I also learned my girlfriend is not a dog. FML." There. Fixed it.