Awkward, Sextoys and Fire: Medieval ****** - FML

Medieval ******

By Brittney - 16/01/2023 00:00

Spicy

Today, I started an electrical fire trying to charge my vibrators. FML

agreeclassic 987

vote type 1 382

End-of-year festivities: New Year's Eve fun and frolics
End the year on a high note with anecdotes where every New Year's Eve firecracker is synonymous with laughter! More…

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It's getting hot in here…

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Today, things started to heat up in the bedroom. Not in a sexual way, though; the lamp caught fire. FML

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By Anonymous - 18/11/2020 01:08 - United States - Joplin

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Today, I bought my first ever vibrator after months of wanting one. Apparently, I bought a cheap product, because it broke and started going off by itself later. It shook my whole dresser while my best friend and I were in the room. I couldn't get it to shut off. FML

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By fire starter - 16/08/2015 04:10 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I tried to vacuum to surprise my mom with a clean house. The vacuum started shorting out, sparked, and then burst into flames mid living room. FML

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By Anonymous - 19/05/2015 14:01 - United Kingdom - London

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Today, I bought my first vibrator. I was really excited, until my crippling OCD kicked in, forcing me to turn it on and off seven times in rapid succession, causing it to give off a cracking sound and stop working. Now I'm sad. FML

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By Lyn - 18/01/2012 11:15 - United States

Today, I'm supposed to start my new job as a Crime Scene Tech. Instead, I managed to electrocute myself with my hairdryer. I'll now have to attempt to explain to them that I really am qualified to safely operate an electrostatic lifting device, and other expensive equipment. FML

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Bad timing

By Anonymous - 20/04/2022 18:01 - Australia

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Today, I was pantsless, horny, and my vibrator died, so I put it on charge next to my bed. My mum then came in, crying hysterically about how she got fired. I was still naked. I felt so bad. FML

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By Anonymous - 01/12/2010 08:35 - United States

Today, I tried to fix my laptop charger by fiddling around with it using metal tweezers. Not only did I forget to unplug the cord and shocked myself, I also ended up breaking the charger completely. FML

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By Anonymous - 04/05/2018 19:00

Today, I managed to electrocute myself on a plug socket while I was showing a group of trainee electricians how not to electrocute themselves while rewiring a plug socket. FML

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Shocking!

By Toasted - 29/04/2019 20:00

Today, in an attempt to be frugal, I tried to repair my own sometimes-faulty toaster. Turns out I unplugged the wrong kitchen appliance, which I only discovered by electrocuting myself while pulling it apart. Now it's definitely broken, will need replacing, and I have a burn. FML

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Next

TOP COMMENTS

Dr_Alex 10

Monday 16 January 2023 0:25

Plural! And all out of juice. Respect!

RichardPencil 30

Monday 16 January 2023 1:07

If you need multiple electric vibrators, you're probably ready to upgrade to diesel power. Diesel has great torque over a wide range of speeds, if you know what I mean. ;)

Comments

Dr_Alex 10

Monday 16 January 2023 0:25

Plural! And all out of juice. Respect!

RichardPencil 30

Monday 16 January 2023 1:07

If you need multiple electric vibrators, you're probably ready to upgrade to diesel power. Diesel has great torque over a wide range of speeds, if you know what I mean. ;)

TeaTimeAbyss 22

Monday 16 January 2023 19:28

Things are getting hot!

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Today, I was told I have bipolar disorder. I'm 31. It took so long to diagnose because my mom always figured I was "just a super bitch half the time." FML

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Today, we got our Christmas bonuses. Instead of money, the company decided to give us all lunch boxes with the company name on them. I went ahead and put my lunch in mine, then put it in the break-room refrigerator. Apparently so did all the other employees. Now I can't find mine. FML

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Today, yet again. my boyfriend told me I'm getting fat, even after I told him to stop and that it's affecting my mental health. I had an eating disorder previously, and now I'm thinking about going back to just eating an apple a day. FML

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Today, my four-year-old daughter started screaming and lashing out at me as I was getting her ready for a bath. It seems my idiot husband told her she was still small enough to be feasted on by the "drain monster". FML

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Today, I took the wrong train and didn’t realise it until it arrived in Aberdeen. Eight hours from where I was meant to go. FML

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