Sex, Awkward and Intimacy: Kiss from a rose

Kiss from a rose

By sealy - 28/12/2010 07:44 - United States

Today, I was told I sound like a seal barking when I orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 067

You deserved it 7 865

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By crier - 27/08/2013 18:34 - United States - Norfolk

Today, I realized the moans I make when masturbating sound like I'm crying. I realized this when my neighbor pounded on the door asking if I was okay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 598

You deserved it 12 449

By shopper242 - 22/11/2010 12:29 - France

Today, my boyfriend compared my orgasm to that of a beached sea turtle. He demonstrated what he meant in front of all our friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 902

You deserved it 4 095

Honky

By Anonymous - 05/08/2015 14:06 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I let out a moan that can only really be described as sounding like a clown car horn. He ended up laughing so hard that he couldn't continue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 024

You deserved it 5 032

By Ugh - 13/09/2015 06:03 - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me that I moan too much when we have sex. I actually just fake my moans in an effort to cover the sound of my cracking hips. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 370

You deserved it 5 881

By Anonymous - 27/12/2013 20:18 - Jamaica - Kingston

Today, I overheard my boyfriend bragging to his friend about finally giving me an orgasm yesterday, but that he got scared because my orgasm face made me look like "a camel having a stroke." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 176

You deserved it 5 849

It's all too much

By toomuchlove - 02/08/2010 23:32 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend that I like it when he moans while we're having sex. Unfortunately, he interpreted that as "milk it". The sound is so obnoxious, it's starting to ruin the sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 703

You deserved it 27 245

By laury - 09/05/2012 02:05 - Canada - Port Elgin

Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 558

You deserved it 3 623

I'm coming!

By anonymous - 24/02/2010 05:05 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me I look like a fish gasping for breath when I "finish" during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 865

You deserved it 4 479

Breaking

By Kev - 23/08/2023 06:00 - Ireland

Today, I was giving a presentation when my voice cracked like a teenage boy going through puberty. The audience giggled every time it happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 606

You deserved it 66

By screamer - 02/09/2012 06:41 - United States - Paso Robles

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I was apparently really loud, because when we finished I heard his mom and grandma sarcastically imitating me outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 946

You deserved it 38 468

xFalzz 0

Tuesday 28 December 2010 12:12

Oh yeah, yeah, yeaaaa- ARF ARF ARF ARF *begins to clap hands violently*

BelleElle_fml 5

Tuesday 28 December 2010 13:51

Did anyone else reinact this in their heads?

Comments

BigBagel 0

Tuesday 28 December 2010 12:26

that's you cue to go trip and die

nikki9tails 3

Tuesday 28 December 2010 12:27

i seriously cant picture anyone doing that LOL how does that happent?

BloodyHeel 8

Tuesday 28 December 2010 12:39

Sounds very arousing.

oliver86 8

Tuesday 28 December 2010 12:40

is that what the walrus said

alwa7sh 2

Tuesday 28 December 2010 12:42

Seal style sex is the best, your a winner OP

brownlace 0

Tuesday 28 December 2010 12:56

do better!!! lmao

Catiie9595 0

Tuesday 28 December 2010 12:56

oh dear

Keyman1212 14

Tuesday 28 December 2010 13:01

At least you're able to seal the deal... Eh, ehhh?

oliver86 8

Tuesday 28 December 2010 13:05

fistnazal 10

Tuesday 28 December 2010 13:47

noooo-- yeeeeeeess man, works everytime!

kate177 0

Tuesday 28 December 2010 15:18

Hahahahaha:))) that's soo funny!

RachelBerry_fml 5

Wednesday 29 December 2010 3:30

very punny =3D

gabsta 3

Tuesday 28 December 2010 13:04

ooh sexy

Skroal_stomper 5

Tuesday 28 December 2010 13:11

Why care as long as you are getting off. If your man can give you the big O than all is well. Hell the sounds most likely help him get off.

lalalalalalalala_fml 0

Tuesday 28 December 2010 19:56

lol!

Keywords

Love Awkward Relatable Students Work Racism Health Cheating Pregnancy Relationship advice Friends Teenagers Embarrassing Sex Intimacy Revenge Food Animals Cats Boredom Management Kids Parenting Sexism Parents Miscellaneous Weird Job interview Facebook Social Media

The Top

Today, despite the fact that I'm happy and in love, my spiteful brat of a 12 year-old keeps spreading hateful and disgusting lies about my boyfriend doing unspeakable things while I'm away on business. Her dad told me he's reporting my boyfriend to the police. FML

I agree, your life sucks 118

You deserved it 474

Today, I emailed my boyfriend from work. Out of habit, I absent-mindedly entered my department into the "From" field. My boyfriend didn't notice when he replied. Now my entire department knows I want to "drop to my knees and suck him when I get home." And he plans to "finish on my face." FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 905

You deserved it 74 253

The Top

Today, I found out my boyfriend is cheating on me with a woman twice my age. I'm 32. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 734

You deserved it 3 987

Today, I got rejected by a girl I wasn't even trying to ask out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 429

You deserved it 4 160

Today, I asked my girlfriend to marry me. She pretended not to hear me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 778

You deserved it 4 976

Today, after buying hundreds of dollars worth of Christmas presents, my transmission blew up on the interstate heading home. Now, I either have to return the gifts or not drive over 25. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 296

You deserved it 974

Today, I accidentally let out a silent but obscenely deadly fart in the doctor's waiting room. It was so foul that a woman got insanely pissed at her kid because she thought he'd shat his pants again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 818

You deserved it 3 697

Today, I got a call saying that my son was chasing all the girls in the class with his "Sword of Death", otherwise known as my dildo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96 031

You deserved it 49 640