Kids are assholes

By ohnomommy - 03/03/2020 06:01

Today, I was in line at a gas station with my 3-year-old daughter. A "little person" was in line in front of us, buying a pack of cigarettes. My daughter yelled, "No little boy! Only grown ups can smoke." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 882

You deserved it 208

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Not now!

By Anonymous - 20/09/2009 05:01 - United States

Today, I was in a department store with my three year old daughter to buy some new jeans. I took her into the dressing room with me and as I began to take off my pants she yells, "Mommy, you can't go peepee in here!!" I am no longer welcome in that particular store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 385

You deserved it 3 847

By [...] - 12/12/2013 14:28 - France - Vaulx-en-velin

Today, while waiting in the queue at a supermarket checkout, my three-year-old daughter yells out, "Mom! Mom! Is that a man or a lady in front?" Embarrassed, I reply, "Honey, can't you see that it's a... it's a... a..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 009

You deserved it 8 250

No fun

By Anonymous - 03/01/2021 20:01

Today, I was finishing a cigarette outside of the mall when we heard someone fart. Turns out it was a little girl. They looked around, so jokingly I said, "We didn't hear anything." Her family giggled and so did we, until everyone realized the little girl was now sobbing. I'm a POS. FML

I agree, your life sucks 826

You deserved it 187

By itsjustmyluck - 09/11/2009 04:37 - United States

Today, I was in line at the store behind a lady and her young daughter. Trying to be polite I smiled at the little girl. She burst into tears asking her mommy 'what is wrong with that ladies teeth'. Apparently braces on a 25 year old is not 'kid friendly'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 315

You deserved it 3 288

By Confused - 23/03/2012 15:34 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was yelled at for smoking at a bus stop, because a woman didn't appreciate me smoking by her children. She did this while waving her own lit cigarette in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 121

You deserved it 5 413

People disprove

By matt - 12/03/2021 08:01

Today, I, a forty year-old man, went to the store with my teenage daughter and infant son. I got some very dirty looks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 126

You deserved it 112

By Nottheprettylady - 05/04/2009 01:07 - Canada

Today, at my job as a cashier, a man and his 3-year old son got in line. The father said, "Give this to the pretty lady," looking at me. The kid looks at me, looks at his dad, and walks over to the next cashier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 984

You deserved it 3 818

Do as I say, not as I do

By Gracie - 24/05/2019 12:02

Today, I was having a cigarette in a smoking area when a mother with a pram strode towards me and exaggerated a cough to make some sort of point. Reluctantly, I put it out and walked off. I then turned around to see her lighting up a cigarette, and blowing smoke all over her baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 024

You deserved it 302

By Anonymous - 19/07/2014 17:39 - United States - Cape Coral

Today, I was at the local grocery store. I've had really bad gas lately, and I accidentally let one go while standing in line. The woman behind me thought it was her kid, and smacked him for farting in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 561

You deserved it 41 806

Stranger danger

By john doe - 07/12/2013 17:29 - United States - Portland

Today, my 6 year-old daughter got mad at me for not buying her yet another expensive doll. I had to pull her away, and she started screaming for help. The next thing I know, another shopper puts me in a chokehold and calls for security, all while my daughter smirks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 040

You deserved it 6 207

Boyufd 24

Tuesday 3 March 2020 8:33

hopefully he has a great sense of humor

Aiden89 23

Tuesday 3 March 2020 7:49

Did they have a short temper?

Comments

Aiden89 23

Tuesday 3 March 2020 7:49

Did they have a short temper?

Boyufd 24

Tuesday 3 March 2020 8:33

hopefully he has a great sense of humor

JasonThorn 19

Tuesday 3 March 2020 14:37

Don't feel too bad, OP. Kids don't have that filter adults SHOULD have. How did he react?

ojoRojo 27

Tuesday 3 March 2020 14:42

Okay but The guy *should* understand that little kids don’t understand that little people are adults yet

jcarter25 12

Tuesday 3 March 2020 19:34

Southwest should use this story for a commercial. Wanna get away?

Sarah Townsend 4

Tuesday 3 March 2020 19:42

My daughter did pretty much the same years ago, but the man she did it to was a friend... he was stunned into silence for about half an hour... lol

distortedcognition 17

Tuesday 3 March 2020 20:06

Well taught, although the mini mini you should know smoking is bad no matter what

demix_fml 32

Tuesday 3 March 2020 22:06

Oh, the mouth of babes .

WistayShlaio82 13

Wednesday 4 March 2020 0:31

That’s ok, she’s 3. She’ll learn later. But for now, it’s cute. Like this story.

jk_waks 20

Wednesday 4 March 2020 5:51

Hopefully he’ll understand that she’s just a child and your obvious next responsibility should be to explain to her what “little people” are!

Keywords

Kids Music Names Work Customers Awkward Bodyshaming Coworkers Landlords Money Roommate AITA Parents Allergies Dogs Singing Embarrassing Cute Neighbours Accident Ironic Health Animals Cats Love Airport Sex Intimacy Relationship advice Cheating

The Top

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunderstorm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96 943

You deserved it 251 933

Today, during an episode of King of Queens that my boyfriend has seen more than once, I decided I'd try to get a little frisky. I straddled him while he was on the bed and began taking my clothes of. He pushed me out of the way and said, "Don't get naked in front of the TV." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 730

You deserved it 4 481

The Top

Today, I realized that my 5 year old son has more money saved up in his piggy bank than I have in my actual bank account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 968

You deserved it 10 330

Today, I was putting the finishing touches on my portrait of a young boy in art class. I asked my teacher if she could help correct the bad parts of my portrait. She said, "Well that would take all day and I just don't have the time." She was serious. I thought this was my best work yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 257

You deserved it 5 132

Today, I got into an argument, followed by the silent treatment from my boyfriend, because I told him that he should change his underwear daily. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 940

You deserved it 591

Today, I went shopping with my grandma. She went to the bathroom and was gone for a long while. I jokingly asked, "What happened, you fall in?" She did. She had shit all over the back of her shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 418

You deserved it 7 106

Today, I got a client who ordered ice cream. She seemed really nice and I thought maybe she was into me. When I asked if she wanted peanuts for an additional 50 cents, she said no. Trying to be nice, I added them anyway free of charge. I later had to call the ambulance. She was allergic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 055

You deserved it 110 706

Today, while I was taking a break at work, someone stole my iPod from my desk. I work in a police station. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 205

You deserved it 8 276