Today, I have been single and out of the game for so long that instead of having real wet dreams, I now dream about jacking off. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, it’s been so long since I’ve had sex, even my wet dreams are about doing it solo. FML
Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML
Today, it’s been so long since I've had sex, I dream about it every night and I can barely function mentally unless I masturbate frequently, otherwise I get random boners throughout the day that won’t go away, no matter how much I try to think about something else. FML
Today, I had the most action in months when I woke up to a wet dream. I'm married, I guess that tells you all about my sex life. FML
Today, its been so long since I've been single, I’ve reached the age where I need Viagra just to masturbate since there’s no woman in my life to save the pills for. FML
Today, I cried while masturbating because I genuinely couldn't think of a single person that would fuck me in real life. FML
Today, after more than a year of being single, I finally had sex. Unfortunately, it was only in a dream, and after we finished, he told me that I'm terrible in bed. Even my dream-lover is a dick. FML
Today, I had a very nice, long, and pleasant dream about having a girlfriend for the first time since 2010, and then I woke up. I'm right about myself, I'm going to be single for the rest of my life, and there's no point in trying to change that. FML
Today, I woke up after having a wet dream about Marge Simpson. I really need to get laid. FML
Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 39
Forever alone.
ICastillo 24
Well your hand will never let you down or cheat on you. It will always be by your side.
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Comments (85)
MNBOY16 15
I know that feeling!
aj94w 4
I'm sorry.
perdix 29
How can you be out of the game when you can always play with yourself?
kingsian 15
That's bad business man just bad maybe you should just make your dream a reality
funnyguy2697 6
if it makes you feel better, i dont even have wet dreams
scifichic92 8
Don't worry OP, story of my life.
Taurus_ChicKa 36
Well, I guess you could always do it and make your dream come true. :D
gman90210 18
I now how ya feel it sucks. I have tried to and met same women but it always ends being boring cause I don't know how to talk to them past hello and after about 15 minutes they move on.
insaneDONUTZ 15
oh geez
WhoSaidDat 10
Damn...that's probably the biggest fml ever posted...no offense bro,but your life sucks
beehardxcore 26
10/10; you are a comedic wizard.