Weird, Abuse and Love: Get your act together

Get your act together

By Z…… - 14/11/2012 00:43 - Australia

Today, my girlfriend snapped at me for being lazy and incompetent, and declared that if I was going to behave like a child, she would be treating me like one. This includes safety-proofing the house, talking to me like a 3-year-old and slapping me with a wooden spoon when I do something wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 761

You deserved it 35 980

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Same thing different taste

Can't win

By Anonymous - 06/01/2024 18:00 - United States

Today, if I don't do work around the house, my girlfriend will call me a lazy pig and yell at me. If I do, she will yell because I didn't do it the right way. If I ask her to clarify the right way, she will call me a dumbass, give useless instructions, and work herself up into yelling at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 725

You deserved it 250

By PanFace - 13/10/2009 06:54 - Australia

Today, I had an argument with my wife. I told her to get back in the kitchen. How does she respond? By doing what I told her to do, and returning to hit me with a frying pan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 115

You deserved it 121 308

The blame game

By stupid child - 24/03/2023 10:00

Today, I asked my girlfriend to stop her preschooler from playing in the kitchen when I'm cooking dinner. She bitched about how I'm "controlling and micromanaging". As she did so, he put his hands on the hot oven and screamed in pain. She then shrieked that it was my fault he hurt himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 100

You deserved it 616

By Anonymous - 10/12/2012 18:09 - United States - Victorville

Today, my girlfriend felt bad about a rude comment she made to me, and asked me to insult her in return. I told her she was getting fat. Wrong move; now she's not speaking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 142

You deserved it 44 610

By what did I do? - 15/10/2015 19:30 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She slapped me in the face, stormed out and won't answer my calls. What the hell? FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 326

You deserved it 2 544

By Anonymous - 01/11/2014 18:23 - United States - Cincinnati

Today, my girlfriend came over to my place unannounced. She slapped me in the face, said, "You son of a bitch." and stormed off. I have no idea what that was for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 839

You deserved it 5 514

Sharing is caring

By T…… - 15/10/2023 00:02

Today, my girlfriend had a bitch fit because I snatched a couple of her fries for myself. She regularly raids my snacks, takes food off my plate, and has even stolen my work lunches, but a couple of fries is too much to ask. FML

I agree, your life sucks 691

You deserved it 139

By Anonymous - 31/03/2011 21:53 - United States

Today, my girlfriend tearfully complained that I was smothering her to death with my clinginess, and that I should learn to respect her boundaries. This is after she complained I wasn't giving her enough attention. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 877

You deserved it 5 082

Thanks dad

By Anonymous - 19/09/2013 17:32 - Canada - Brantford

Today, I took my girlfriend home to meet my parents. My dad was having a bad day and was rude from the outset, but things went to total hell when he started screaming that he'd "kill" our microwave if it didn't "shut the hell up". My girlfriend now thinks we're a family of abusive psychos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 874

You deserved it 3 323

By hopeless - 14/02/2015 20:04 - Canada - Halifax

Today, my girlfriend berated me for my "lack of communication skills", all while deeply engrossed with something on her phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 739

You deserved it 2 882

Icyghost17 10

Wednesday 14 November 2012 8:46

I suggest you start throwing tantrums, refusing to eat your veggies, and demanding bedtime stories. If you can't beat em, join em!

MasterGamer591 13

Wednesday 14 November 2012 8:44

Talk to her like she is an old lady DO YOU UNDER....STAAAAAAAND miss

Comments

interesting33 36

Wednesday 14 November 2012 14:27

Who beats children with a wooden spoon?? Take it off her and put it on top shelf or something!

SwAGkiLlS 5

Wednesday 14 November 2012 14:32

Well... at least the spoon is kinda hot

Sandman366 6

Wednesday 14 November 2012 14:57

Perhaps its one of the stranger bdsm techniques...or maybe she's in the mind of a 15 year old thinking she's a mother.

Livemusicxo 2

Wednesday 14 November 2012 15:05

Dayum, take advantage of it turn it kinky!! Lol

fergnasty 14

Wednesday 14 November 2012 15:07

Get a job and she won't treat you like you're three...

Levvy 22

Wednesday 14 November 2012 15:14

Maybe you should get a job before criticizing people for not doing the same. What? You never said you didn't have one? Neither did the OP.

Alan2 24

Wednesday 14 November 2012 15:34

Time to get off your ass!

catchbigtuna 0

Wednesday 14 November 2012 15:48

Kick her to the curb.

taranpreet 7

Wednesday 14 November 2012 16:02

She must be extremely fed up lol. I don't think she's trying to be abusive it's clear she loves him, but I don't think she's thought through how to get him to change. He's going to put up with it because [he's lazy and incompetent and] this isn't really testing him. OP probably finds this hilarious.