Embarrassing, Alcohol, Drunk and Miscellaneous: Get back here! - FML

Get back here!

By Anonymous - 12/02/2010 07:51 - Canada

Today, my very drunk mother decided to run down the block naked, screaming at the top of her lungs, "She's trying to kill me!" as I followed behind her in my car, yelling for her to get in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 150

You deserved it 2 751

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 03/06/2011 01:07 - United States

Today, I saw a woman run down my street screaming, "Fuck you cops! I can drive under the influence if I want to!" It took me a second to realize it was my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 337

You deserved it 3 533

By FunTimes - 19/08/2019 04:00 - Canada

Today, my mom got drunk and tried to push me off a ladder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 673

You deserved it 121

By MereLewis95 - 26/10/2011 08:58 - United Kingdom

Today, my mother called me urgently from the kitchen. Thinking she was hurt, I ran to her as fast as possible. She threw a wet cloth at my head and ran away, laughing her face off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 451

You deserved it 4 523

By Anonymous - 22/12/2010 22:23 - United States

Today, my mother took a bunch of sleeping pills, then went driving. I followed her and dialed 911. Now she thinks that I was "trying to get her arrested," and she refuses to talk to me ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 145

You deserved it 4 853

By meeeoow - 22/01/2011 10:05 - Australia

Today, my drunken father decided to walk my quiet street naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 658

You deserved it 2 773

By Vince - 09/12/2011 19:38 - Canada

Today, I was cuddling up on the couch with my girlfriend, when my drunken mother walked in the room, slurred out, "Room for one more?" and leaped on top of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 058

You deserved it 3 228

Mommy dearest

By Ohkourt - 20/04/2020 05:00

Today, I woke up only to find my half-naked drunk mother in my living room, talking in her sleep about how much she hates me. She still doesn't see what's wrong with this picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 653

You deserved it 110

By Anonymous - 21/05/2014 16:05 - United States - New York

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 854

You deserved it 4 365

By hannahlorraine - 25/11/2011 03:12 - United States

Today, while I was in the shower, my very drunken mother came home. She then barged into the shower with me, still completely clothed, and gave me the longest, most awkward hug of a lifetime. After she left me still in shock, she came back and did it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 219

You deserved it 2 806

By driverboy - 31/12/2014 08:08 - United States

Today, I had to pick up and drive home a couple of drunk bitches. Unfortunately, one of these drunk bitches was my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 903

You deserved it 4 873

Next

Top comments

Brave_Sir_Robin 4

Friday 12 February 2010 16:15

"If you see a man or woman running down the street at full speed completely naked and in terror, run with that person because you have no idea what is coming from the other direction."

Gidget772001 0

Friday 12 February 2010 16:01

she's crazy!!!

Comments

orangesodaftw 0

Friday 12 February 2010 17:48

I smell a fake fml

xDyZFuNkTiOnULx 0

Friday 12 February 2010 17:49

O.O sounds like your mom needs help?

deng314 0

Friday 12 February 2010 17:56

hahahaha! Your mom is hilarious!!!!!!!

Nic_hole 0

Friday 12 February 2010 17:58

whoa that's intense haha you should get her help...??

jnrockstar10 0

Friday 12 February 2010 18:05

Party at OP's house we'll get drunk and have a free show!!!

YourFullOfShit 0

Friday 12 February 2010 18:16

lol @ 51..I think so too..

grovyle210 3

Friday 12 February 2010 18:16

uhhh oh snap

BieberFeverLol 0

Friday 12 February 2010 18:26

omg this made my day!

HelloAnna 0

Friday 12 February 2010 18:34

Very true indeed. ^^

shoguu 0

Friday 12 February 2010 18:51

and?

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Keywords

Management Work Jealousy Love Relatable Mental health Relationship advice Friends Miscellaneous Awkward Health Healthy Lifestyle Ironic Food Birthday Family Money Mother in law Gifts Parents Public freakouts Education Students Exams Pranks Weird Argument AITA Insects Fear

The Top

Today, according to my husband, if I die first he won’t be looking after my son from a previous marriage. Either my sister will have to take him or he’ll go into foster care. He doesn’t want kids of his own, so he’ll be dammed if he has to look after someone else’s just because I’m dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 504

You deserved it 946

Today, I'm 25 and still a virgin. At this point I'm not sure to feel embarrassed or proud. Imagine being 25 and not know what the fuck you are doing in the bedroom. I don't know who it would be more awkward for, me or them. Maybe I'll just avoid human interaction all together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 141

The Top

Today, I was taking a bubble bath, and had my iPod touch on the side of my bathtub so I could listen to my music. My dog walked up to the side of the tub, looked me in the eye, and nudged my iPod into the water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 997

You deserved it 55 682

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to have sex with a piece of fruit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 123

You deserved it 8 538

Today, it's now a week since my mum and aunt shunned me for refusing to play the big brother and give my 17-year-old cousin some dating advice. I'm 31 and have never dated, been in a relationship, or been sexually active. I wouldn't know where to begin with advice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 989

You deserved it 282

Today, my wife is pregnant and sick. She switches from sobbing she's sorry for that, to blaming me for "doing this to me." On top of that, I have half her symptoms now: throwing up and crying for no reason. This will be a long 9 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 748

You deserved it 5 080

Today, I heard my next door neighbour screaming as if someone was trying to slice her throat. Her window was open. Intrigued, I went onto my balcony and asked if everything was okay, and if she needed anything. She and her boyfriend shout back in unison: "We're F*ing, go away". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 049

You deserved it 8 179

Today, my ex-girlfriend started dating the guy she told me not to worry about when we dated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 358

You deserved it 4 139