Today, my girlfriend complained that I don't kiss her often enough. The problem is her breath. It's disgusting. I gently answered, "Well, you don't kiss me often either." Now she keeps kissing me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss, he rubs his tongue along all my teeth and says, "You need to brush your teeth." FML
Today, I realize that my boyfriend's breath quite literally smells like a sewer. It wouldn't be so bad, except that he tries to kiss me about every ten minutes, and I have to hold my breath. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me how she loves when I kiss her out of the blue. I don't have the heart to admit I only do it so I can get some peace and quiet for a few seconds. FML
Today, my girlfriend yelled at me for breathing too much. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML
Today, instead of pushing me away or simply stopping for a minute, my girlfriend kept kissing me as she was trying to get phlegm out of her throat. The slimy goo ended up in the back of my mouth. I can still taste it. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend and she tasted like a cigarette. I don't smoke. She doesn't smoke. My roommate does. FML
Today, I’ve discovered that even if he brushes his teeth for 10 minutes straight, flosses, and rinses with mouthwash, my boyfriend’s breath still smells like a cross between sewage and rotting fish. I’m running out of excuses for not kissing him. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
heynow09 0
i think it shows that you really love her that your still with her even though her breath stinks but you should just be honest with her so you can actually enjoy kissing her.
amandaMALICE 0
hahha. I would want a guy to tell me something like that. I wouldnt care Id be like "oh shit hold on lemme buy some mints"
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (86)
123Puppy 33
You should’ve just nicely told her the truth.