Today, while working as security for a football game, I told a woman she wasn't allowed to bring her Snickers bar into the stadium because no outside food was allowed in. She threw it at my face, then tried to spit on me. I hate people. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, at work, a woman came up to the snack bar and ordered a pretzel with no salt. When I served her the food, she angrily complained about it having no salt, followed by her throwing the whole thing in my face. FML
Today, at my football game, I turned around to spit so that it would be away from my teammates. I ended up spitting on a 10-year-old kid walking behind me. FML
Today, while bagging my groceries at a store, a lady came over to me, took a good look at the food I'd bought, picked out an item and put it in her bag. When I confronted her, she called security on me and told them I wanted to steal her stuff. I got thrown out and she walked away with a smirk. FML
Today, I was chewed out by my boss for reporting someone not wearing a mask in our store, because, "no one likes a snitch." I'm the security guard. It's my job to report that to her. FML
Today, as an usher at a beauty pageant, I was helping other patrons when a group walked past me and sat. I politely asked to see their tickets, but one of the women got angry and ripped hers up to throw the pieces in my face. Without a ticket, I had to kick her out. The police were called. FML
Today, at work, I was screamed at and slapped by a woman for supposedly violating her 2nd Amendment rights. In reality, I'd simply turned her away from the 10 items or less line because she had well over the allowed number of items. I've no fucking idea what's wrong with some people. FML
Today, at the movies, some asswipe kept throwing candy at me. After 20 minutes of it, I got up and went over to get him to stop. Good news: his balls vanished faster than a politician's spine immediately after being elected. Bad news: I got kicked out for "starting a disturbance". FML
Today, I assisted my first customer at my first job as a Target cashier. When I rang up this lady's items and gave her the total, not only did she hiss at me and spit in my face, but she also dragged my manager over and demanded that he fire me. He did. FML
Today, I was yelled at for smoking at a bus stop, because a woman didn't appreciate me smoking by her children. She did this while waving her own lit cigarette in my face. FML
Today, a customer asked a question I couldn’t answer. I asked if she would wait while I consulted someone else, but she spat in my face and stormed off. My manager saw, wrote me up for refusing to help, and gave the woman a gift card for her troubles. FML
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Top comments
Dukeje 0
Oh, dude that sucks...i hate most people too. Respect and courtesy to others seems to be a thing of the past.
DrAwesome 6
Dude, this was the best-worded FML I've read in a while. The ending gave me a giggle. :3
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Comments (151)
j_cat187 20
r u antisocial?
DocBastard 40
Are you a good speller?
beccusmaximus 0
Heh, I believe the answer to that is "no."
RosiePatosie 0
you hate me?
BloodyHeel 8
Yes.
datkid117 13
I would say YDI for being so anal over a snickers bar, but at the same time I can't stand when people try that at the movie theater with like HUGE bags of popcorn. And they do get angry! FYL
nerdface89 2
Maybe if cinemas and stadiums made their prices more reasonable, we wouldn't be forced to do this
avatarnicole 13
Umm, have you people ever thought that it was his JOB, and even if he thinks it's an unfair rule he has to inforce it? You can't just let people break the rules all the time, that's how you get fired.
avatarnicole 13
Sorry, *her
myth0x2 2
That lady sounds like a major b$@ch.
iheartglasses 0
I do agree banning a candy bar is extreme, but if everyone in the stadium was allowed one candy bar, thats a lot of trash that usually doesnt make it to the garbage.. And she shouldn't have acted the way she did over a candy bar... Unless she was diabetic and needed it just in case?
Gravemind_fml 1
You wouldn't happen to work for CSC would you?
dannyswin 0
One snickers bar? You need to lighten up.
rockinhottie 0
she should have known that you werent going to jepardize your job over a candy bar ^^
YigalElohev 2
It's lame how a lot of people think the rules don't apply to them. I would have had her thrown out. That said, you should have disemboweled her. Ha.
bigbadtim 7
Nah, impaling is better.
RedPillSucks 33
Vlad Tepes
Erissa 2
#14, and you're one of those 12 year olds that gets kicked out of the mall cause you're too cool to show manners isn't assuming fun?