Today, while working as security for a football game, I told a woman she wasn't allowed to bring her Snickers bar into the stadium because no outside food was allowed in. She threw it at my face, then tried to spit on me. I hate people. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at work, a woman came up to the snack bar and ordered a pretzel with no salt. When I served her the food, she angrily complained about it having no salt, followed by her throwing the whole thing in my face. FML
Today, at my football game, I turned around to spit so that it would be away from my teammates. I ended up spitting on a 10-year-old kid walking behind me. FML
Today, while bagging my groceries at a store, a lady came over to me, took a good look at the food I'd bought, picked out an item and put it in her bag. When I confronted her, she called security on me and told them I wanted to steal her stuff. I got thrown out and she walked away with a smirk. FML
Today, I was chewed out by my boss for reporting someone not wearing a mask in our store, because, "no one likes a snitch." I'm the security guard. It's my job to report that to her. FML
Today, as an usher at a beauty pageant, I was helping other patrons when a group walked past me and sat. I politely asked to see their tickets, but one of the women got angry and ripped hers up to throw the pieces in my face. Without a ticket, I had to kick her out. The police were called. FML
Today, at work, I was screamed at and slapped by a woman for supposedly violating her 2nd Amendment rights. In reality, I'd simply turned her away from the 10 items or less line because she had well over the allowed number of items. I've no fucking idea what's wrong with some people. FML
Today, at the movies, some asswipe kept throwing candy at me. After 20 minutes of it, I got up and went over to get him to stop. Good news: his balls vanished faster than a politician's spine immediately after being elected. Bad news: I got kicked out for "starting a disturbance". FML
Today, I assisted my first customer at my first job as a Target cashier. When I rang up this lady's items and gave her the total, not only did she hiss at me and spit in my face, but she also dragged my manager over and demanded that he fire me. He did. FML
Today, I was yelled at for smoking at a bus stop, because a woman didn't appreciate me smoking by her children. She did this while waving her own lit cigarette in my face. FML
Today, a customer asked a question I couldn’t answer. I asked if she would wait while I consulted someone else, but she spat in my face and stormed off. My manager saw, wrote me up for refusing to help, and gave the woman a gift card for her troubles. FML
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Top comments
Dukeje 0
Oh, dude that sucks...i hate most people too. Respect and courtesy to others seems to be a thing of the past.
DrAwesome 6
Dude, this was the best-worded FML I've read in a while. The ending gave me a giggle. :3
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Comments (151)
weasellikecat908 0
duude! i just moderated an fml from the person who spit on you!!! :-o small world.
Gramardam 0
dude same!!!
J_Rari 6
I agree... people suck. They are spineless, disrespectful, and hypocritical. At least all the ones I deal with on a regular basis... You'd think college would have more people that have their shit together.... it amazes me that they accepted some of these idiots.
Currentlyonfire 4
look op you are correct. bring food from the outside is no allowed and you should of kicked her ass to the curb like a cheap $2 hooker.
DisappearingRose 18
Then*
painemission 3
You could, maybe, ignore minor infractions of mostly pointless rules... YDI
Vayerman 4
YOUR A SECURITY GUARD!! USE YOUR SUPER POWERS.
LOLSWAT 0
shoulda gotten the bitch thrown out for that shit.
Maria1560 0
EXACTLY!! -__-
iloveloosy12 0
same here bro
x3herox3 0
yDI 1) reason 1:cuz u work as security 2) reason 2: at a game, they threw all my granola bars, sugar, and water. I was diabetic.
lucious1 0
if you have an I.D card that has it on there DL should, they have to let you in with it