False hope

By :(( - 14/06/2011 18:06 - United States

Today, I invited over my best friend, whom I've loved for over a year, since she had to tell me "something important". I got excited and thought she was going to tell me she loved me too. She ended up coming out to me, and wanted to know if I would meet her girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks 45 960
You deserved it 6 120

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well atleast she trusts you as a friend and you know that she won't be with another guy? :)

Uh, no. There isn't. Lesbians don't like guys. They don't like dicks. Lesbians don't want to get with you. Ever.


HarryMcC 1

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Well on the bright side at least she didnt like you because your ugly or something

HarryMcC 1

was that a response to me 4?

Veraymix 6

You shouldn't have waited so long and just told her. However, there are certain...benefits to this situation.

A three way was the first thing to come to mind for me, too, and it always will be for FMLs like this.

Or you could support your friend instead of trying to exploit her into a threesome. Or if all else fails just get a sex change and get with her.

kingtz 6

I second the threesome. Or at least be a good friend and offer to be the cameraman.

Part 2 was a joke. But seriously I don't know how hard it is to come out but I can only guess when the us is so bigoted.

Uh, no. There isn't. Lesbians don't like guys. They don't like dicks. Lesbians don't want to get with you. Ever.

flockz 19

i dont find a threesome a joking matter. it's serious business.

UnicornHooker 0

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asoptavlo14 6

keevarou I though you were a guy...

60: With a name like UnicornHooker I don't think you should lecture people in sexuality or fetishes.

#65 It's just a screen name. It's not as though it's their actually profession.

Pretty_Pink_Lady 10

Gasp! Nerdsgetmehot is back. What a pleasant surprise!

Flutist 3

Sexuality is a fetish. To sexually desire someone you have to want them, which means visualizing them. Guys tend to be visual about sexuality and if it turns them on then you should respect their sexuality and desires the same way they should respect your lesbian girlfriend. Unless they make a comment at you, in real life (admit it FML is just a cesspool of bad jokes) or have a campaign to destroy your relationship, or touch you inappropriately, then there is nothing wrong with them discussing their "desire for a threesome." If you are a consenting adult and there are no llama or kids involved then why is it such a big deal for them to desire lesbians the same way you do?

60- well I should hope your girlfriend is a lesbian. I imagine it would be awkward if she weren't, considering that you are, in fact, a girl yourself...

abbytequiere 9

84- It's always possible that she could be bisexual. She doesn't just have to be a lesbian to be dating a girl. Or she could be pansexual. The list goes on.

UnicornHooker 0

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UnicornHooker 0

65, it's a Lady Gaga thing, I doubt you'd get it. In the Little Monster community, "hooker" is a good word.

thewhiteninja 0

great numver of thumbs

bitchslapped22 14

46- then why do they use ******?

Firecrotch07 0

I call all my hoes hookers too.

UnicornHooker 0

118, 126, think about it. Disliking guys and and dicks doesn't mean lesbians don't enjoy penetrative sex. And besides, a lot of ****** aren't penis shaped. Also, you're both generalizing hideously. My girlfriend and I don't use ******. In fact, most lesbians I know don't use ******. Not all lesbians automatically use ******.

keevarou I seriously think you are the dumbest person ever. a ***** is a mould of a dick. it is intended to represent one so they are in every way similar. now she may not get her rocks off on the guy with the dick and prefer a girl with a strap on but that doesn't take away from the fact that one is a representative of the other.

UnicornHooker 0

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you know I don't think I come to this site for the fmls I come here for the comments

canttouchthis90 0

haven't you thought that they just don't like guys period, the ***** is just for satisfaction.

Sorry OP. FYL * 10.

@46: it ain't guys buying up them strap-ons.

But it still make guys wonder why dont lesbians just use guys for they're dicks?:/

with jen anniston! (:

From a simple threesome joke, to a complete argument on sexual fetishes. What the hell is happening to FML?

not if she only sees him as a friend.

cUt3w0lf66 0

haha totally! :)

hook_em 0


I can't believe you guys are fighting about what shape a ***** is ...

VicVic, it's cuz they are born with a certain genetic makeup where they are not attracted to men. It isn't choice, it isn't going against religion, but it is just biology and it is perfectly natural.

Flutist 3

Dildo is a specific term used to describe an object shaped like an erect penis used for sexual stimulation or a stupid or ridiculous person. A bullet is not a ***** at all but a vibrator. On the other hand, there are ****** that are made from brightly colored material and do not look like a penis at all. Also, a fetish is your attraction to a person, yes. I merely wished to point out that a person's desire for someone is specific only to them and will not always be the same to another. One lesbian might like women with strap-ons, others might not. These are specifics. A sexual fetish is defined is the sexual arousal brought on by any object, situation or body part not conventionally viewed as being sexual in nature. Being attracted to someone for their eyes or their personality, in this definition counts as a sexual fetish. You are attracted to people for reasons other than their loins.

AngryNinja 1

172- lesbians like ******. They have no reason to use a guy for his dick when they have no interest in dick. Did you skip over the whole conversation..?

Those of you who are complaing about why leabians use ****** but don't like penis is because they are in it for the sexual pleasure. Physical attraction is different from pleasure. I doubt any of you would have sex with someone you are not attracted to...

countryboyj17 0

199, that is where you are wrong. people have sex with those they aren't actually attracted to all the time: it's called being drunk and/or desperate.

Miq94 0

ye a one handed camera man ;)

Are you an idiot? A strap on attached to a girl is a toy. A dick on a guy is still a dick.


your giving all these people sex lessons.. kinda odd

52- "Stone Sour"? that joke is old.

YouAdoreMe 0

when someone asks you to talk never assume it's about something good

torrrrxoh 0

threesome it is! (:

candycoated89 0

there might still be a chance for you. maybe its a phase? if not... unlucky for you

ZoroFresh 0

if it's cylindrical it's a representation of a dick

hold em down and have a threesome. there sexuality debate solved. it won't matter what they think

drakesylvan 6

They like dicks, just not on men.

Because as a lesbian I find men very very unnattractive and I think penises look like hairy over-sized worms. Got it?

239 Stone Sour is epic

Jeez way to be a dousher and just kill his threesome idea

Shut up feminist

Lesbians =/= Threeway. Its ridiculous to assume that, and only the smallest percentage would ever be up for that.

Are you literally saying they are lesbian for sexual pleasure? Sexual pleasure is different for everyone, and has nothing to do with sexual orientation.

No. It was said lesbians use ****** for sexual pleasure. that's all

well atleast she trusts you as a friend and you know that she won't be with another guy? :)

brockp 0

I don't believe in gay marriage

You probably could have done something about that if you grew a pair and asked her out a year ago. Not to sound like a jerk or anything. FYL OP

she's lesbian

sephoraprincess 7

world cup cheer? some of my friends cheer there haha. I'm at spirit factory. you guys are great!

maybe she's bi

"It's okay to have a 3-way" - thelonelyisland

192- pardon me but it's " It's ok when it's in a three way. l

" It's ok when it's in a three-way. "**

Love her friend too! ; )

it's hard to believe u were born in 99 -.-

HarryMcC 1

well he's obviously not a pedophile...

39 - and seeing an old guy makes you want to creep his profile? naicee.

39, I was just about to say that!

61- lmao!!!!!!!! :)

IronMaiden45 0

wow you really look 12 what's your secret?

brittanie711 3

wow born in 99 u look mad older than ur birthday says .

IronMaiden45 0

he can be like robin williams in the movie jack where he's actually young but looks old lol

ifailplzinsultme 0

here's a way you can feel better. Just buy a video camera and find a place to hide it. Watch, sell, profit!

he's joking. relax

ifailplzinsultme 0

First: Im joking. FML isn't a serious enviorment where someones jokes should be taken seriously. Why aren't you going up to the threesome coments and saying "I had a friend who had a threeway and died from a STD you sick bastard." Second: The 26 thumbs up disagree

Flutist 3

Omg, you sick bastard. I had a friend get video taped in a Starbuck's bathroom dying of an STD!

ifailplzinsultme 0

^Duhh winning!:)

Quagmire_ladies 9

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Unless she's bi, that isn't going to happen. :P

Or open to new experiences. She doesn't necessarily have to be bi for that, does she?

#27 If she wasn't sexually attracted to him, why would she have a threesome with him?

"New experiences", there is such thing as being bi-curious.

#43 Yes, but OP's best friend isn't necessarily bi-curious. All we know is that she's a lesbian.

I didn't say she was bi-curious, I'm speaking hypothetically.

49: Dumbeldore's dead, you ain't getting that letter.

#67 I know. >.

Uh, what self respecting lesbian has a threesome with a guy?

17- everytime I see your picture I feel dirty, your pajamas look like a little girls pjs

#162 I'm not wearing pjs, it's a tank top. Good grief.

And this is the perfect example of how a lot of guys take no as try harder. She is literally saying she isn't attracted to your gender but this guy thinks there are ways around that.

well that sucks :(. at least as someone above me said, you might be able to have a threesome.

8 Nah it's called thread-jacking. Replying to the first comment so people can see your comment. Also why does everyone think of threesomes? 8)

Why do people assume that lesbians are into threesomes with guys? Probably pornography, but obviously that's nothing like real life. Unless they are bi, that's a no-go.

kathii01 20

You should have confessed your love to her a while back.... Maybe things would have ended up different for you :( sorry op

kingtz 6

I'm pretty sure his confessing his love won't change the fact that she's a lesbian.

35 - It actually might. From my knowledge, a lot of gays are confused or uncertain about their sexual orientation for a period of time. Depending on opportunities and experiences, they'll discover whether they're actually gay or not. Another possibilty is that she might be bi-sexual. If OP confessed to her while she was still "discoverinh" herself, who knows what might have turned out?

ColleenMcDonnell 0

okay stfu! you HONESTLY think someone can control who they're physically attracted to?

IKickPuppiesHard 16

Um, yes.

...No, that's not how that works. If anything, telling her would probably have made things much more difficult for her.

That's not how being gay works.

it doesn't matter. keep ya head high and maybe just maybe there's that chance of a threesome. *.*

UnprecendentedAw 0

FML's should not be about people whining about their love lives. If it doesn't make me laugh or make me grimace, it shouldn't be on here. This one is stupid. Who moderated this garbage?

emileyb 3

I told my best friend that I am a lesbian and then he told me he was in love with me it was the most akward moment of my life

You also look like you're 12. Give **** a chance before you knock it. Poor, poor ****.

kingtz 6

And then you guys had a threesome?