Today, I bought a small tub of coconut pieces in a bid to eat healthier snacks at work. I noticed that the chunks were a bit slimy, but thought nothing of it and kept eating. It wasn't until I reached the final few pieces that I noticed a huge black slug crawling across the bottom of the tub. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, instead of reaching for some unhealthy food, I tried to eat some dates instead. It was all fine until I bit one in half and saw a rather large, squirming maggot inside. FML
Today, I bit into a cereal bar and thought the inside was oddly damp. I took a look at it and saw a maggot worm wriggling around. Its friend was in my mouth. FML
Today, I was eating a bag of almonds I got from the bulk food store, picking off what I thought was stringy remnants of their shells. When I finally got down to the bottom of the bag, I found a silk worm circling around the last almond left of a bag of about 200. FML
Today, I was running late for work, so I grabbed a cheap sandwich from a gas station. As I rushed to take a bite, I bit into something unexpectedly hard. I thought it was a tough bit of bacon, or some sort of nut, but realized it was a small plastic fork that had been helpfully hidden inside my sandwich. I'd already swallowed half of it. FML
Today, I was eating a brownie my grandmother had made, only to discover an inch long piece of what resembled dead skin in the middle of it. This discovery was only made after taking a bite and wondering why the consistency was wrong. FML
Today, I was dumping some old milk in the sink and noticed it wasn't going down. Assuming food was clogging the drain, I stuck my hand down in it to remove the food. I removed a blueberry and half a cockroach. FML
Today, I was halfway through eating a what I though was a delicious sandwich, when I turned it over and saw nasty green mold on the bread. FML
Today, I was eating at my aunt's place with all my cousins and the salad had little green and alive bugs. I didn't want to cause attention, so I tried to pick some off and just kept eating. FML
Today, I decided to snack on some M&M's. I saw my dog sniffing something and realized one of my M&M's had fallen on the floor. To prevent my dog from eating the chocolate, I hurriedly snatched the M&M off the ground and ate it. When I bit down, I realized it wasn't an M&M. It was a dead beetle. FML
Today, I went into my kitchen after placing a line of salt across the floor in front of the back door the night before to ward off slugs that keep getting in, only to find 12 idiotic slugs dead and shrivelled up, leaving a horrible gooey mess. I don't know why I expected any intelligence from them. FML
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Top comments
giantsfan2010 23
*barfs*
paigexox0 37
Wtf i think it being slimy should have told you something was very off
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Comments (93)
julianbozikovic 20
At least it's organic!
princess318 6
I'd be downing moonshine tonight.
Miss_A_x0x 12
It's... Organic at least?
wanderer_alone 8
This is fates way of telling you that eating healthy is chumps
buckdharma 38
Slip slidin' away Slip slidin' away You know the nearer your lubrication The more you're slip slidin' away.
BrotherPhil 35
One purple, egg shaped object fell into the pan.
Badabam_fml 14
I'd be calling customer support and screaming down the phone. They'll either give you a refund of free products. Not that you'd really want a free product...
Jmgonzo 10
Yeah because screaming will make them do whatever you want. Maybe try, I don't know, talking to them about it?
Witchylady 18
Yuck!!! That is gross. Ew!!!! You poor thing. I guess the slug was enjoying the coconut slices too
StickyPickles 33
There I WAS eating dinner. Thanks for that
graceinsheepwear 34
Coconut is pretty fattening, so you said goodbye diet when you bought a tub of it.
Jmgonzo 10
He was probably eating a lot worse foods before that so it was a relatively healthy switch, to which he said hello diet.