Today, I bought a small tub of coconut pieces in a bid to eat healthier snacks at work. I noticed that the chunks were a bit slimy, but thought nothing of it and kept eating. It wasn't until I reached the final few pieces that I noticed a huge black slug crawling across the bottom of the tub. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, instead of reaching for some unhealthy food, I tried to eat some dates instead. It was all fine until I bit one in half and saw a rather large, squirming maggot inside. FML
Today, I bit into a cereal bar and thought the inside was oddly damp. I took a look at it and saw a maggot worm wriggling around. Its friend was in my mouth. FML
Today, I was eating a bag of almonds I got from the bulk food store, picking off what I thought was stringy remnants of their shells. When I finally got down to the bottom of the bag, I found a silk worm circling around the last almond left of a bag of about 200. FML
Today, I was running late for work, so I grabbed a cheap sandwich from a gas station. As I rushed to take a bite, I bit into something unexpectedly hard. I thought it was a tough bit of bacon, or some sort of nut, but realized it was a small plastic fork that had been helpfully hidden inside my sandwich. I'd already swallowed half of it. FML
Today, I was eating a brownie my grandmother had made, only to discover an inch long piece of what resembled dead skin in the middle of it. This discovery was only made after taking a bite and wondering why the consistency was wrong. FML
Today, I was dumping some old milk in the sink and noticed it wasn't going down. Assuming food was clogging the drain, I stuck my hand down in it to remove the food. I removed a blueberry and half a cockroach. FML
Today, I was halfway through eating a what I though was a delicious sandwich, when I turned it over and saw nasty green mold on the bread. FML
Today, I was eating at my aunt's place with all my cousins and the salad had little green and alive bugs. I didn't want to cause attention, so I tried to pick some off and just kept eating. FML
Today, I decided to snack on some M&M's. I saw my dog sniffing something and realized one of my M&M's had fallen on the floor. To prevent my dog from eating the chocolate, I hurriedly snatched the M&M off the ground and ate it. When I bit down, I realized it wasn't an M&M. It was a dead beetle. FML
Today, I went into my kitchen after placing a line of salt across the floor in front of the back door the night before to ward off slugs that keep getting in, only to find 12 idiotic slugs dead and shrivelled up, leaving a horrible gooey mess. I don't know why I expected any intelligence from them. FML
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Top comments
giantsfan2010 23
*barfs*
paigexox0 37
Wtf i think it being slimy should have told you something was very off
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Comments (93)
giantsfan2010 23
*barfs*
WhoopteDo 26
normally one word comments are stupid. this one however was perfect, well played.
CrassKal 27
I'm just going to say it, you might want to get yourself checked out. Mollusks like slugs and snails can carry deadly parasites if you ingest them.
Philintheblankz 14
Extra protein!
Gunny20 25
That's nasty, but still healthy.
badmandilon 19
It wanted to eat healthy too. Can't blame it.
Gunny20 25
Well, A+ for effort.
Sagedrop 10
Slimy and yet satisfying.
LusciousLovebug 6
Actually, not healthy. Slugs can carry deadly parasites if ingested. Considering it obviously touched everything this person ate, they need to see a Dr.
paigexox0 37
Wtf i think it being slimy should have told you something was very off
haileyrows 26
One would think- but if op hadn't had any snacks like that before they might not have known the sliminess wasn't normal...
Ashwathi 21
That's disgusting. I'd probably puke.
Thatepicperson 14
Yeah, it sounds like an experience worse then 9/11 and the holocaust combined.
elcee1987 18
I nearly did just reading it
Welshite 40
Mmm. All natural slime sauce. It's the perfect condiment for the best types of diets.
zikangtng 26
Bear Grylls approves?
ifunnyftw 10
"Cocoslugs"
itsme82 18
That was brilliant lmao.
brendejafulable 41
Worst thing imaginable.
buckdharma 38
no, she'll probably just feel a little sluggish.
doctorhook86 25
#8: I imagine genocide is worse than someone accidentally eating some slug-slime.
xxNIGHTxx_fml 17
#40 You took that comment way to seriously, mate.
NotGabe 28
It's always a good idea to check out what you're snacking on before you eat it.
AverageJoey 18
Well at least you didn't also eat the slug.