Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Envy
Today, while watching my guinea pigs have sex, I got jealous. Yeah. It's been that long. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Plymouth, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I found out that the squeaking I've heard for the past three months, that I thought was my guinea pig, is actually my girlfriend cheating on me with my older brother. FML
murphy
United States
Today, though I'm normally unperturbed by my single-ness, I walked by some squirrels engaged in mating rituals and felt a pang of jealousy. FML
ratfaced
Stamford, United States
What a cozy moment
Today, I woke up to a squeaking noise and the feeling of something furry on my cheek. I smiled, thinking it was my guinea pigs nosing me awake. Then I remembered that my guinea pigs were in their cage on the other side of the room, and opened my eyes to see the biggest rat ever staring right at me. FML
Merdoc
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my girlfriend's guinea pig managed to go down her shirt. I have been dating her for 3 weeks and I haven't even kissed her yet. FML
stpdaziandude
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I was watching an animal behavior movie. All of a sudden, it brings up two snails going at it. I got hard watching it. FML
Anonomous
Plainfield, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Naughty boy
Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML
Beeisc00l
Reserved
Today, I was playing video games at 2am. My guinea pig started squealing at me, and wouldn't stop until I turned out the lights and got into bed. I'm 20 years old, and I've let a rodent dictate my bedtime. FML
HelpMe
Galashiels, United Kingdom
Today, my mum asked me how the guinea pig was doing. We don't have a guinea pig. Turns out she had volunteered me to look after the next door neighbor's guinea pig when they were away and 'forgot' to tell me. They have been gone two weeks. FML
bored2death
United States
Today, I realized that the only one willing to hang out with me this summer is my guinea pig. FML
nick
Highland Park, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my girlfriend started making pig noises during sex. FML
Top comments
duztx 0
So why would you watch them?
Lounia_fml 8
Animal **** isn't the solution.. get out there OP :P
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Comments (85)
jrod12391 1
well thats not weird...
silverFML 0
ha you got free ****. XD
mintcar 10
Yuck. Rodent **** isn't going to help him much. This FML is really pathetic. You should've probably used your summer a bit wisely. Y'know, going out and meeting people. Watching your pets get some is just futile in so many ways.
imright24 0
unless a woman is married and not getting any at home, she should never complain about not getting sex. a woman, any woman, can get laid almost any day of the week if she really wants.
perdix 31
Why don't you knock that bitch out of the way and have that male mount you and stick his pigly pig-meat into you?
killedmyteacher 0
eewwwwww
piehunter1 0
Win!
piehunter1 0
Win!
alicia_was_here 3
so you didnt get jealous watching them have sex all the other times you creeped on your guinea pigs?
triggerit 5
try to watch rabbits sex... you will be happy for yourself...
triggerit 5
no it will be "animal planet"...
casanova7 0
tts animal ****!
glitchedgamer 0
why the **** are you watching guinea pigs have sex? no wonder nobody will have sex with you.
beancoinc 0
Nothing makes you look sexier than self confidence and a smile, turn it on & find a man that pleases you, kisses & smiles!
brokenclockwork 0
you, my friend, will resort in ***********.