Today, I was making love to my wife from behind. As we both reached climax at the same time, she threw her head back in ecstasy just as I buckled forward with pleasure. We slammed our heads together, effectively ending our orgasms. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was having the best sex with my husband, and right when I reached climax, he shouted "Abracadabra!" FML
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when I lifted myself up a little bit. What I was not prepared for was my boyfriend leaning down to kiss my neck. We collided heads, hard. FML
Today, I went down on my girlfriend. In the midst of her orgasm, she grabbed my head with her legs, performing a submission most UFC fighters could be proud of, and she held on for so long that I almost suffocated. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. She had such an uncontrollable, aggressive orgasm that I'd be celebrating my efforts, if only in the process she hadn't knocked over my new expensive laptop, which then split in half. FML
Today, I made love to my girlfriend. I penetrated her for a while, then stopped to get my breath back... She carried on moaning even though I'd stopped moving. FML
Today, I was having sex with my wife, when she fell asleep. She then woke up and started moaning, clearly faking an orgasm. FML
Today, my wife fell asleep. I was giving her head at the time. Her snoring gave it away. FML
Today, after a long dry spell, I spent a day treating my wife, ending with a full body massage. She was wearing only panties, breathing heavily, and spread her legs, so I reached for her crotch to finger her… and she kicked me in the head so hard I fell off the bed and split my head open. FML
Today, my wife threw up in the middle of sex, then fell asleep right after. I didn't even finish and it'd been over a month since the last time. FML
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Top comments
andres19 0
that's why you wear protection
ahlun 0
doggy skill requires skill
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Comments (253)
thatsmeh 0
haha wow :)) anal :))
mariazzz 5
lmao great feeling from behind
largefoofighter 0
yeah if they were retards
kpsmith 0
You're clearly doing it wrong.
cjt1980 2
that sucks!!
mapleh 0
she deserves it for faking an ******...
kinga08 0
1. You're having sex with your wife. 2. You were having sex in a position other than missionary. 3. You both achieved ******. 4. You both achieved ****** at the same time--something many couples have to work hard at to accomplish. This is not an FML, sir. You should be very grateful & happy! Go have some more sex and stop complaining :)
skittlez12345678_fml 0
hahahaha so ******* true and i love your eyes
joa76 3
If you have to work hard, you're doing it wrong... Is it even possible to make it happen if you're trying? I think it's supposed to be one of those things that just happens.
xxCupcakeGirlxx 0
:)
natysogy 2
i agree with both 79 & 106. sometimes it just happens, sometimes you have to try =/
joa76 3
I'm really not sure why that got so many thumbs down...I don't know about everyone else, but as far as I know it's almost impossible to get off if you're concentrating on it, let alone trying to make it happen when, but not before, the other person gets off. You really just have to be in synch with the other person to get off at the same time, not actually TRY for it. I suppose it's easier for the guy, though, since he can get her close and then let himself go, whereas it takes so much longer for a girl to get off (and it's no big deal if she gets off before him, since girls can easily have multiple orgasms), it'd be nearly impossible for her to get close enough to time it right.
kinga08 0
Joa, I get what you mean, but by "work hard" I meant it takes time for couples to figure out that sync you're talking about. In my opinion, you need to have good sexual chemistry and know each others bodies for both of you to ****** at the same time. Some couples unfortunately just can't get it to happen, which stinks for them!
annigotammo 1
great use of adjectives. lol
brigitte522 0
mad.
shuzuko 2
Aww, laugh it off and go again! Every good couple knows that sexy-time-fails are just lol-fodder and an excuse to have more sex :D I'm ridiculously clumsy and have banged various body parts against various walls and furniture so many times. It doesn't mean you should get upset, haha.