Miscellaneous: Comedy gold

Comedy gold

By skippy_liz - 26/10/2010 07:48 - United States

Today, I went to the library to pick up a copy of Romeo and Juliet for my English class. After looking around for half an hour, I asked the librarian. "I couldn't find Shakespeare anywhere. Where could I find him?" She quickly replied, "He's dead", giggled to herself, and went back to her work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 570

You deserved it 8 903

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Same thing different taste

By haha - 04/09/2011 00:04 - United States

Today, I was at the library, and had finally found the book I'd been looking for, when a man approaches me, says "The main character dies at the end", and walks away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 491

You deserved it 3 435

By Juliet - 10/03/2011 12:36

Today, I auditioned for my school's production of Romeo and Juliet. When they announced that I got the part as Juliet, all the guys auditioning for Romeo suddenly disappeared. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 952

You deserved it 5 926

My short hair!

By Trama1201 - 04/01/2020 14:00 - United States - Boston

Today, I went to the library to bring back some books, I walked up to the counter and the librarian turned to me and said "What can I do for you young man?" I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 777

You deserved it 326

By Anonymous - 18/04/2018 11:00 - United States - Twin Falls

Today, I went to the park to read “The Book Thief”. I fell asleep and when I woke up, my book was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 344

You deserved it 994

By lostintdot - 31/07/2014 11:38 - Canada - Kitchener

Today, while wandering around the big city I just relocated to, I asked a seemingly pleasant-looking lady where the nearest library was. She told me to get lost, and started laughing. Then said she was just joking and gave me directions. I'm now standing in front of a gay strip joint. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 951

You deserved it 5 159

By FML FML FML!! - 27/05/2019 06:00

Today, we had to do a scene from Romeo and Juliet. I was Romeo, and this really pretty girl was Juliet. When she found out she was with me, I heard her say "FML." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 027

You deserved it 169

What hell, lady?

By Anonymous - 21/04/2021 08:00

Today, my friend wasn't responding to my whispers in the library, so I walked over and very slightly moved his chair. At that exact moment, the librarian walked in. Regardless of our efforts to tell her anything, she got us banned from the library. FML

I agree, your life sucks 689

You deserved it 279

By Talkingbeforethinking - 16/03/2019 18:00

Today in class I accidentally called my teacher very old and almost dead. As we were discussing a book I said that the book character is very old and close to death since it fitted to the context. Turns out this character is one year younger than my teacher and she wasn't amused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 713

You deserved it 626

By Sariitaa_fml - 18/11/2017 19:00

Today, I was in the romantic section of a book store making fun of the titles. Thinking my friend was behind me, I read in a sexy voice, “Sleeping with a Stranger” and turned to laugh only to find the 70-year-old store manager smiling and winking at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 846

You deserved it 1 518

By Noname - 19/02/2009 23:17 - United States

Today, I was at the library studying. There was a really cute guy across the room. I decided to play it cool and walk his way and grab some water. Right as I walked by, my body decided to let out the loudest fart. He laughed. I kept walking and asked my friend to grab my books. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 000

You deserved it 14 123

habeeboburky94 0

Tuesday 26 October 2010 16:03

isn't she just hilarious? o.o

jok3r_l3tal 0

Tuesday 26 October 2010 16:04

Lmfao nerd ****** xD

Comments

the4starr 3

Wednesday 27 October 2010 14:17

that's hardly a FML but still, the librarian sure has a great sense of humor ;)

cmac86 23

Wednesday 27 October 2010 19:08

not really an fml. just kind of an annoyance.

iGoRawrx3 0

Wednesday 27 October 2010 20:43

don't you love retarded librarians(: ?

morella_xx 29

Wednesday 27 October 2010 21:43

How is the librarian the retarded one? The OP is the one who wandered around a library for half an hour without thinking to use the card catalog.

rcrdcstnd 0

Wednesday 27 October 2010 21:17

what a creeper

stro88 6

Thursday 28 October 2010 6:07

I smell pwnage from a librarian.

mitchem 3

Thursday 28 October 2010 7:55

I'm sure she thinks she's the funniest thing alive...

Ronnika 0

Thursday 28 October 2010 11:23

She needs to be fired. I work at our Library and if any of us did that, we would be out of a job.

anon15_fml 0

Tuesday 2 November 2010 0:00

I think I'm in love. lol

candycane0120 0

Wednesday 12 January 2011 10:40

wow. just wow. LOL

Amajean 7

Tuesday 15 February 2011 19:30

man that librarian is an idiot. Clearly, she did not understand what you meant.

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The Top

Today, on my way home, my girlfriend started sexting me, telling me that she was waiting at my house. In my rush to get home to see her, I got pulled over and had to be patted down. He found no weapons, but he did find my stiffy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 962

You deserved it 12 660

Today, after a very long, nasty custody battle with his ex, my boyfriend’s kids were finally scheduled to spend the night at our house. Today is also the day my daughter came home with a note from school about the massive lice outbreak on campus. Yup she has it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 772

You deserved it 103

The Top

Today, at work, I had a coughing fit so bad I actually shat myself. What felt like a gallon of liquid crap poured down my trouser leg onto the floor. I work in a competitive office and this happened in front of 30 spiteful coworkers who love posting pics online. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 666

You deserved it 357

Today, Murphy's law didn't check out: my piece of toast didn't fall on the side containing the spread of jam. However, when I leaned against the corner of the table to pick it up, I knocked a full ashtray on top of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 470

You deserved it 145

Today, I found out the time I'd requested off for a trip in 2 months, that my boss said that I could go on, wasn't fully processed, just in case he decided I couldn't go. He told me the second part after I'd bought no refund tickets for shows for both me and my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 766

You deserved it 156

Today, I've been single for so long, I very nearly had a wet dream about an anthropomorphic frog. A FROG. FML

I agree, your life sucks 831

You deserved it 186

Today, I ran into my parents bedroom after I heard my name and what sounded like painful screams. When I opened the door my parents were on top of each other laughing hysterically. They needed me to find the key to the handcuffs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 185

You deserved it 3 456

Today, I posted a meme which said "I don't know where some people learned their inside voices, but it must have been in a helicopter with running chainsaws." My mom laughed at it. I didn't have the strength nor the bravery to tell her that it was meant for her. Then my dad laughed at it. It was also meant for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 777

You deserved it 238

Comedy gold

Same thing different taste

My short hair!

What hell, lady?

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