Today, someone posted photos from a party I was at. On each photo I'm posing in with a girl, my hand is not touching her, but is hovering over her like some creepy weirdo loser. My Facebook nickname is now of course "Hover Hand." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I sent a Facebook friend request to the guy who had the party I was at last night. I immediately realized, however, that my new profile picture is of me, smiling and holding the trophy I stole from his house. FML
Today, the pictures from last night's party were put on Facebook. The pictures that show me getting in a drunken fight with a girl and her putting my face through the wall. FML
Today, I was on Facebook when I saw a picture a popular girl I don't talk to had posted of her fake ID. She had used my full name and identical signature. FML
Today, I was accidentally tagged in a photo of a group of people by a 'friend' on Facebook. She later corrected it, apparently everyone had already seen the tag and decided that the comment box below was a great opportunity to discuss how none of them would ever be caught dead hanging out with me. FML
Today, I checked my Facebook to find I had been tagged in a bunch of photos from a party I had attended last night. On each picture I had a comment from my mom saying, "You're grounded." FML
Today, I sent my girlfriend a request to confirm our relationship on Facebook. She accepted, then changed her screen name into "His Hand". FML
Today, I was looking through pictures on Facebook. There was a picture of me and my friends with the caption "I love you guys!" below. I had been cropped out. FML
Today, my recent ex-girlfriend posted a photo of herself on Facebook. It was a picture of herself in the arms of a half-naked male stripper. She posted it on my wall. FML
Today, Facebook notified me a "friend" had tagged me in one of his photos. It was a group photo of 20, but my face was the only one that was intentionally blocked out with an emoji because I "didn't belong in the group." FML
Today, I found an old photo album in my Facebook account, which had pictures of previous hangouts with people I called friends at the time. I deleted it because they progressively cut ties with me over time. FML
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Top comments
AbstraktThoughts 13
Better than being in the background of every picture just looking at the girls. Now THAT would be a real creeper.
Bakarra 22
You poor thing, hover handing and then being called hover hand, life is so unfair sometimes...
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Comments (35)
SApprentice 34
I think I'd rather be known as the hover hands, the person too respectful and cautious to actually touch a girl, than be known as someone who is seen touching multiple girls in many different photos. They may tease you, but it shows that you respect their personal space enough that being put in close proximity makes you feel awkward and you don't know where to put your hands. It's perfectly respectable. It's better than there being dozens of photos of you touching and pawing at many different girls. Unless a male is your close friend you probably wouldn't be dangling off of them while posing for photos at parties, so why should you treat the women there any differently? It's a good thing, OP, and I'm sure some of the women there appreciated your attempt to be tactful.
UberNova 18
"You had your arm around 4 girls in 4 pictures?...you sicken me" Most people rarely care who is touching them in photos, where they are being touched is a different story.
rudegirlmania 10
14, please be joking. I was laughing after the second sentence, anyway... You know very well that OP wasn't being respectful. If he did want to praise girls' personal bubbles like you make it seem he did, couldn't he simply leave his hands by his sides and, I dunno......stand next to the girls? :O
SApprentice 34
29- No, I wasn't joking, and don't sit there and try to tell me what I 'know very well'. I'm allowed my own opinion, and you have no right to say what I am actually thinking. Sometimes people are just not comfortable doing the things that society norms expect them to, so they waver in the middle, and the end result is usually getting mocked. I personally appreciate a guy who is awkward in social situations, who isn't entirely comfortable doing the same dipshit behavior as everyone else.
Felling 14
You are stupid. That is all.
bettyc4 26
Own it bro
buckdharma 38
he,s the magic man momma. ahh he,s got the hover hand.
bubina 14
Loser.
nancyschmancy 9
I say photoshop the pictures. You probably could do some pretty sweet things in the space between your hand and the girl. Lightning bolts, butterflies, little hearts, musical notes. Turn your humiliation into creation!
kemando 22
They did a college humor photoshop tutorial for that, lol look it up, it's quite hilarious.
Isoldael 27
Maybe the pictures were all taken while OP was getting ready to pose, just at the moment he was about to touch her. That would have been one hell of a troll photographer...
Anubis_81 21
I saw pic of a dude like that on some memes website, said it was a clear indication the dude had never been laid.
qirde_15 5
go! you have many hand hovering jobs to do!
Lankaa 4
Oh no that is terrible! Who will play you in the movie?
PsychoBitch666 8
Moral of story: Don't ever do anything you don't want to be tagged in on Facebook.