Today, I took my new girlfriend to meet my grandmother. We were drinking coffee when my gran leaned to one side and let out a huge fart. Proud of herself, she added, "That one didn't pay his rent on time!" Coffee came out of my girlfriend's nose. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, while waiting for my boyfriend to get out of the shower, I chatted with his grandma. As soon as we hear him exit the restroom, she smirks at me and lets a huge, smelly fart out. She blamed it on me. My boyfriend believed her. FML
Today, I turned around after loading the washing machine to discover my husband's 89-year-old grandmother dropping her pants. She looked at me and said, "I hope you don't mind but when you got to go, you got to go." She then sat down on the toilet and let out a loud, long fart. FML
Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce her to my parents. As we arrived, my grandpa was leaving the bathroom. He looked over at my girlfriend with a worried expression and said, "Never take a shit in this place. Feels like I wiped my arsehole with sandpaper." FML
Today, I went out to a restaurant with a girl I have been dating. The only conversation was about how proud she was of her fart during work earlier, and how she managed to clear out a section of the office. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to a family dinner. Things went great, until my grandma arrived. She thought it would be okay to continue our friendly prank war by congratulating me on my "wife's" pregnancy. My girlfriend actually believed it, and now thinks she's the "other woman". FML
Today, my girlfriend managed to trap a fart in her nightgown and carry it all the way from the bathroom, into our bedroom, and finally into our bed. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML
Today, my grandma got a new boyfriend. She dumped the old one because "His wife was taking too long to die." FML
Today, my girlfriend farted in her sleep, woke me up because it was so damn loud, and my room smelt like rotten noodles for about an hour. FML
Today, I brought my girlfriend of six months over to meet my family. When my grandpa saw her, he said, "What a waste of good breeding stock." FML
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Top comments
lishajoy777 14
Your Grandma is AWESOME!
zombieslayer83 19
Did pay the gas bill though!
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Comments (172)
Gestpacho88 12
This seems more like a win to me. I mean the girlfriend didnt seem to be bothered by it since coffee came out her nose, so she was probably laughing pretty hard, and you find out you have an epic grandmother.
AJDanko 7
I'm sorry, where is the FML here?
animalzxx 4
She's a keeper
simoncat 11
Bonding moment.
MrsAlexander83 10
This is by far my favorite FML of all time!!
interesting33 36
I don't understand about the rent thing? What did she mean? What was the joke? Thanks!
RedPillSucks 31
See comment #9. I didn't get it either, but the nice FML members politely (snicker) explained.
wow810 4
That's a good sign if she laughed about it and not been all rude and disgusted that it happene... She's a keeper
Kalipczo 21
I wish my gran was still around, she was the type who would crack wise jokes like that in public and no one would say anything cus she was old. Old people can do what they want when they want.
b_rizo 6
best. grandma. ever
conholio33 28
Way to go grandma