Today, I came home to visit my family after a year at college. Expecting to impress them, I proudly informed them that I now speak fluent Swedish. Imagine my surprise when my mother said, "That's a useless language" and everyone agreed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out that I was moving to Germany. I'm going to be put back a year in school because of the system change. I also don't speak a word of German. Why? Because my mother wants to brag about this experience to her friends. FML
Today, my family and I were at a restaurant. We're Swedish and love talking about people in our language because no one ever understands here. I decided to comment about how ugly the girl at the next table was. She turned around and goes "Dra åt helvete." That's Swedish for "Go to hell." FML
Today, my mom booked a family trip to Sweden. This would be great, if she hadn't asked me to tell our former German exchange student that we were coming to visit her in Germany. She was thrilled. Now I have to be the one to let her down. FML
Today, my mom scolded me for ruining my sister's "vacation" here. She just got deported from abroad, and was only gone for 2 months after falling for a marriage scam. Now she deludes to herself that she was born and raised there, and claims not to understand our mother tongue, calling it third world primate language. FML
Today, I showed up at my boyfriend's work to surprise him by speaking in Spanish, his first language. I've been taking classes secretly. He smiled, kissed me, and then finished telling his friend, in Spanish, that I'm boring and ugly but he's got nothing better going on. FML
Today, I discovered the terrible things my parents say about my wife while visiting them. They speak in Arabic around us and I've never really been able to understand them. Guess who hasn't only brushed up on his Arabic, but spent the last 6 months teaching his wife… FML
Today, I introduced my mother to my new girlfriend. My mom made a very nasty comment about her in Spanish, not realizing that my girlfriend teaches Spanish at the local school. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. Within minutes, they said I needed to leave. Their reason? Apparently, I was mocking her dad's speech impediment. I also have one but they wouldn't believe me. FML
Today, my crush walked me home. As my mom opens the door, she tells me in Russian how ugly he is, and that I have extremely bad taste. Out of all the languages in the world, he happens to be fluent in Russian. FML
Today, I paid a surprise visit to my parents, after having moved out for university last year. My room had been stripped bare and all the family photos featuring me were missing from the wall. When I asked why, my mom asked me in return why I was asking stupid questions. FML
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Top comments
azcardinals1307 2
well, it does depend on the location, but that's pretty harsh of them.
StoryOfTheYear 15
Anything to do with Scandanavia is awesome.
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Comments (223)
loppisloppan 2
jag är svensk heheh hejsan.
Calyx_fml 22
Now you can understand Sigur Ros... And it only cost $20000.
Sheh_fml 25
Ah, the language of the great Viking, the heroic blondes of the North, the lovely people of the Scandinavian countries! Also the native language of the founders of both the Noble prize and IKEA. Great guys. I dare your mother to insult my native language in the presence of an actual swede. Or any norwegian or danish for that matter, since knowing any of those languages means you will be able to understand the other two.
ohmandapants 17
You're fluent after only a year? You must have fantastic memory then..
leadman1989 16
Ops dad - Son nah you tolls me yous gon be makin monie wit this hurr fancee edjumakation but jew jus spwekin in tounges pocessed by da devil na uh you gotta raise pigs... Auto correct nightmare! Lol
BloodyMary666 24
Don´t let them get u down. Be proud :)
Mipz 2
Morons. You know how great it is to know random, "useless" languages when applying for a job. Most bosses couldn't care less which language it is, multilingual = good Disagree-ers = stupid O.o
eln3mo13 8
they obviously haven't seen some of those Swedish girls you can now fluently flirt with. well done young padawan
Oscararon 0
Jag håller med, ditt liv suger. Men du kan i alla fall läsa den här kommentaren!
HU4L188 0
Just stop speaking english until they congradulate you on your new language