Love, Animals, Dogs, My ex and Insulting: Good riddance - FML

Good riddance

By Anonymous - 05/02/2023 16:00

Today, after receiving yet again a dozen insulting texts, I realized that my dog has way better grammar than my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 641

You deserved it 148

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
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Same thing different taste

Goblin mode

By WELLFUCKYOUTOO - 14/08/2012 15:02 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my cheating, psycho asscricket of an ex texted me and asked me back out. I said no, and didn't think any more of it, at least until an hour later, when I looked out my window, only to see him smearing a bag of dog crap all over my porch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 568

You deserved it 2 329

It's for the best

By yesguysgetabusedtoo - 24/05/2013 23:42 - New Zealand - Papamoa

Today, my girlfriend had someone else dump me via text message. I knew it wasn't her because for once I wasn't being viciously insulted, and it wasn't written as if an illiterate baboon had taken a shit all over her keypad. I can't even feel happy about being rid of her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 612

You deserved it 6 946

By Afroman720 - 27/07/2015 18:55 - United States

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because her dog "told her to". FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 760

You deserved it 2 887

By hopeless romantic - 14/08/2014 15:06 - United States - Dayton

Today, I realized my dog looks at me with way more love in his eyes than my own boyfriend does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 165

You deserved it 5 528

Fight your own battles

By Anonymous - 01/09/2011 07:07 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that my mum has been texting my ex-boyfriend to tell him what a dick he is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 716

You deserved it 4 785

Good boy

By doggylove - 13/11/2015 03:57 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, I realized my boyfriend's dog is more excited to see me than he is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 617

You deserved it 2 223

By really? - 23/09/2013 02:24 - United States

Today, I texted my girlfriend to tell her that we couldn't hang out because my dog died this morning and we were burying him. She replied that she wasn't going to get stood up by a stupid dog. She then broke up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 065

You deserved it 4 404

By Anonymous - 16/12/2012 05:49 - United States

Today, my ex adopted a dog from the dog pound. It was the same dog he made me get rid of while we were still together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 612

You deserved it 8 506

By random person - 13/11/2011 06:16 - United States

Today, I sent the texts "I love and miss you babe;)." and "Shit wrong person." to my ex just so he would think I have a life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 514

You deserved it 62 343

By fucking hate bitches - 24/12/2016 21:27

Today, I realized that the girl I like only replies to my snapchats if I include my dog in the picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 835

You deserved it 1 701

Next

Top comments

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 5 February 2023 21:01

Your dog is sending you grammatically correct insults by the dozen? Are you sure he's not using ChatGPT to help?

49_Donuts 12

Sunday 5 February 2023 17:29

Why is your ex not blocked?

Comments

BurnInDemonFire 33

Sunday 5 February 2023 16:11

Is your dog free to teach a class at summer school this year? My nephew is a dumbass.

SirEnigM0nk 22

Sunday 5 February 2023 16:14

Block your ex.

49_Donuts 12

Sunday 5 February 2023 17:29

Why is your ex not blocked?

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 5 February 2023 21:01

Your dog is sending you grammatically correct insults by the dozen? Are you sure he's not using ChatGPT to help?

poopface82 18

Monday 6 February 2023 2:35

At least you got out before you ended up having to mutter, “I married her?” every time you interact with her. Which you’re forced to. Because you have children together. At least I hope that’s true.

Keywords

Awkward Love Work Relatable Students Racism Pregnancy Relationship advice Health Cheating Teenagers Friends Sex Intimacy Embarrassing Revenge Food Animals Cats Boredom Management Parenting Kids Sexism Parents Weird Miscellaneous Job interview Social Media Jealousy

The Top

Today, I came home from college to find my favorite silk nightie that I'd left behind being modeled by Bernie, the family dog. Nobody will admit to who put it on him. I don't know what's worse, that my family is a bunch of assholes, or that my nightie is big enough to fit a Saint Bernard. FML

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You deserved it 3 970

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The Top

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You deserved it 3 044

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I agree, your life sucks 23 035

You deserved it 3 017

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I agree, your life sucks 3 516

You deserved it 437

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I agree, your life sucks 860

You deserved it 106

Today, my boyfriend and I were having dinner with my family. He killed a bug and ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 966

You deserved it 4 101

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I agree, your life sucks 8 088

You deserved it 550