By AkaiKitsune - 14/06/2017 10:51
AkaiKitsune tells us more.
By gbabyy - 22/11/2009 03:25 - United States
Freaked out
By Anonymous - 15/08/2010 05:24 - United States
By LadyGoombah - 07/07/2016 01:54 - United States - State College
LadyGoombah tells us more.
Hey guys, OP here! I've been having fun reading the comments and, out of context, I would totally deserve this. However, this happened about 6 years ago and I just wanted to share this with you all because my mom is an FML gem haha. "My dog" was actually the dog I received as my 13th birthday present. In all honesty though, he was more my mom's dog than anything.. she even chose the breed so it appealed to her tastes rather than the rest of the family's (standard poodle). Then she let my sister name him after she threw a hissy fit and he was dubbed Danzig (Danny). But Danny was great and really smart when we first got him. He caught onto tricks almost instantaneously. Sadly, my mom who is only 4'11 and 90 lbs and a total nut thought allowing a grown 1 year old standard poodle to jump out of the car on his own was too much to ask of him and was convinced she was supposed to carry him out instead until one day she dropped him on his head on the driveway. He actually had brain damage and he was unable to be trained very easily (it took months just to reteach him his name) but he was still such a sweetheart and a joy to be around! So when I say she "untrained my dog", it had much less to do with him not listening to commands and more to do with the fact that he had been respectful of other people and gentle and knew not to eat food off of the counters until after I left.. in which case she taught him it was okay to jump full force on guests, steal food off of people's plate (he made attempts even when you were watching!) and, of course, SOMEHOW teaching him to fart on command to "toot toot!" (she didn't even know how she successfully did it. Probably just by saying "toot toot!" every time he farted for 6 months). My mom thought it was the greatest thing and during dinners she would just yell "toot toot!" and Danny would release some of the most vile farts haha As for the people wondering why I left my dog for 6 months with my mom, I'm sure in context you can see it was to go pursue an education since when I left I was 18. I'm 24 now with my own lovely black lab Nylah and I can barely leave her with a dog sitter for more than a day without feeling guilty! For your own amusement, I have made my profile picture of the dog Danny (if you look, you'll see red and orange on the top of his head. That's because my mom gave him a mohawk from head to bottom and had it dyed red).
Goddamn cats!
By Cat: 1 / Me: 0 - 14/07/2025 20:00 - United States
No good deed…
By oops - 04/12/2009 17:23 - United States
By Jukka - 19/04/2011 00:48
I like what I like
By Aled - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom
RIP
By Anonymous - 07/04/2011 07:11 - United Kingdom
Mother nature's son
By Rita - 24/11/2021 10:59 - United States - San Francisco
Crushed
By Danielle - 02/08/2020 08:08
Extra protein
By ReluctantAntEater - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - Canada - Toronto
RIP little guy
By Anonymous - 10/12/2014 19:58 - United States - Murfreesboro
Powerful spray
By Anonymous - 02/11/2022 06:00
Good boy
By This may take awhile - 30/11/2022 12:00 - United States
By FootInMyMouth - 13/02/2016 22:56 - United States - Miami
By karmavictim - 18/03/2011 11:28
By Patiently Watching - 04/03/2017 20:00
By swervelol - 20/08/2017 23:15
Curled out
By lashless - 22/05/2010 20:32 - United States
By Anonymous - 05/08/2009 11:04 - India
Teamwork
By Anonymous - 07/12/2024 12:00 - Australia
By yesikilledit - 20/11/2018 13:30
By DocDog - 24/03/2017 02:00
Alexa, play the Christmas album by Low
By Anonymous - 20/12/2022 03:00
Sorry Mr Whiskers
By Anonymous - 22/05/2025 09:00 - United States
Overcooked
By poopiemanlol - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada
By Anonymous - 03/11/2011 06:22 - Australia
Keywords
To the person who asked why I got such a loud toy for the dog. He likes to take off with his toys to the woods nearby and the loud noise helps me find him again when he's playing taunt the human (otherwise known as keep-away) To the person who said I saw the rubber chicken video and copied it. First that was a rubber chicken my dog has a squeaky sheep stuffed toy. You can find them in pet stores. The horse from the video was grabbing it and shaking his head up and down to get the sound. Mine was using a compilation of biting, dropping it and stomping, and throwing it around. Needless to say the toy is well and thoroughly destroyed. My other horse just got freaked out and ran circles around the paddock.