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Today, the guy I like recommended I buy this computer game. Wanting to impress him, I agreed. Turns out it was a joke. I am now the proud owner of Microsoft Train Simulator 2005, and he can't stop laughing. FML

#13205814
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7827) - you deserved it (30240)

On 09/26/2010 at 4:14am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was expecting a call from my friend. The phone rang and I answered with "WANK!!" as a joke. It wasn't my friend on the phone, it was my boss. FML

#10132808
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7826) - you deserved it (36322)

On 04/25/2010 at 6:00am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I worked for three hours writing very neat notes with one of those pens that erase. I felt very accomplished, so decided to share it on Facebook. I brought my computer over to my lap on top of my notes. Turns out heat from laptops smudges ink from eraseable pens. I can't read my notes. FML

#6775811
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7820) - you deserved it (22696)

On 12/16/2009 at 7:33am - misc - by ohhi_itsme123 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I camped outside of a Best Buy to guarantee I'd get a cheap Blu Ray player. My friend who got there five minutes after they opened also managed to get one. FML

#13986924
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7819) - you deserved it (34319)

On 11/26/2010 at 12:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, all I wanted was stress-relief sex with the guy I sleep with. Instead, I was so exhausted from my day that he thought I wasn't into it and ended up just talking to me about what we're going to do after college. Trading a booty call for a meaningful and heartfelt discussion. FML

#1468
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7818) - you deserved it (31408)

On 01/17/2009 at 3:40pm - intimacy - by Noname - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I thought it would be romantic to fill my girlfriend's room with scented candles and surprise her when she was done showering. I lied there naked, with Kenny G playing softly. I heard a knock on the door, so I told her to come in. To my surprise it was her mom. FML

#7492284
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7814) - you deserved it (17592)

On 01/22/2010 at 1:16am - intimacy - by Toldyouso (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I arrived at work at 8, and business was abnormally slow, but we assumed it would pick up. Few hours later, we had not had a single customer. As I walk out of the restaurant, I realize the open sign has been off all day. FML

#5519537
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7812) - you deserved it (31811)

On 09/28/2009 at 12:03am - misc - by Charlotte - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was smoking a cigarette in my backyard while my parents were out, because I'm not allowed to smoke. While smoking, my parents came home unexpectedly. In a rush, I flicked it over the fence, and it landed in my neighbor's hair. It was still lit. FML

#1952694
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7804) - you deserved it (62955)

On 05/15/2009 at 12:05am - misc - by OuttaNowhere81 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had lunch with some important potential clients at a fancy restaurant. I really wanted to make a good impression. When the piano music stopped, I started clapping while looking around for the pianist. Apparently, it was a CD. FML

#5953871
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7798) - you deserved it (26496)

On 10/23/2009 at 1:01am - work - by E.S. (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I pretended to not be able to go out with a friend so I could hang with my boyfriend at the movies. When I sat down I received a text that said "turn around" it was her. FML

#16181891
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7797) - you deserved it (49088)

On 05/15/2011 at 1:20am - misc - by marmarr - United States

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to take a short cut driving through the snow. I skidded to avoid an oncoming car and ended up in someone's garden, inches from their brand new extension. The house belonged to a police officer. FML

#14045212
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7795) - you deserved it (25237)

On 12/01/2010 at 5:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (South Lanarkshire)

Today, I was driving home from work when I saw a cop come up behind me. Nervous about my expired license, I kept checking in my rear view mirror. In turn since I wasn't paying attention, I ran a stop sign. Needless to say the cop pulled me over and gave me 2 tickets. FML

#1010703
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7794) - you deserved it (48485)

On 04/16/2009 at 1:08am - misc - by imnotcool (woman) - United States (Texas)



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