App
FML for mobile
Free
Open in app
FMyLife

search

Categories

All
Random
Spicy
Nearly FMLs
The Top
FML - The Follow-Up

FML

Submit Moderate

Account

Log in
FMyLife FMyLife
Submit your FML Moderate the FMLs
Log in
All Random Spicy Random Spicy The Top FML - The Follow-Up Nearly FMLs
search
​

Submit your FML

Have you just experienced an FML moment?

Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


    Please read our guidelines for posting

    Money! Get away

    By Disgruntled - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Jamestown

    Today, it's been exactly two years since I got my last raise, and the amount I'd got still allows me the luxury of being able to afford a Snickers bar every month. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 24 126
    You deserved it 2 564
    Share  

    RIP in peace

    By Jill - 01/11/2021 11:00 - United States - Fredonia

    Today, I found out that my favorite aunt passed away. The funeral was last Thursday. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 177
    You deserved it 100
    Share  

    Spoke too soon

    By Anonymous - 31/10/2021 17:00

    Today, we're right now at the hospital because my sister had a miscarriage. Last night I announced on Instagram that I was going to be aunt. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 988
    You deserved it 514
    Share  

    Ghost

    By Braden - 28/10/2021 17:00

    Today, I texted the guy I went out with last night. He'd told me he’d text me when he got home, but he never did. Cracking a joke, I asked him if he was homeless or something, since he broke his word. He replied, “No, I’m just not that into you. Have a nice life.” FML
    I agree, your life sucks 967
    You deserved it 511
    Share  

    Cancel culture strikes again

    By Disneydont - 27/10/2021 20:00 - United States - New York

    Today, I was supposed to leave for Disney. Our trip was cancelled last year because of the pandemic. This morning, we found out my sister’s boyfriend, who was a last-minute add-on to the trip, has COVID. Cancelled again. Maybe next year. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 128
    You deserved it 163
    Share  

    **** those dudes

    By Tia - 27/10/2021 17:00

    Today, my Tinder date said it wasn’t gonna work, all because, I “need to lose some extra pounds.” Last week, I'd had another Tinder date and he told me he’d continue seeing me if I dropped at least 30 pounds. I think I get the hint now. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 140
    You deserved it 437
    Share  

    My FP

    By Anonymous - 25/10/2021 08:00 - United States

    Today, it's been a week since the last time I talked to the person I care about the most. We've been fighting for 2 months and he hasn't even opened the last message I sent him. I went completely radio silent as part of a bet, because others are convinced that he'll miss me. I don't think he's noticed. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 325
    You deserved it 1 197
    Share  

    Too late

    By ObiOneStillLonely - 24/10/2021 11:00

    Today, I met my dream man. Intelligent, excellent conversationalist, similar spiritual beliefs, attractive and compassionate. He proposed to my best friend last week. She asked me to be maid of honour. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 891
    You deserved it 321
    Share  

    Serial Shitter

    By Anonymous - 24/10/2021 05:01 - South Africa - Johannesburg

    Today, I got an email from a colleague with a picture in it of shit on the toilet seat. The email said, "Not pointing fingers but I left you out of the last email." I pee a lot and so I use the toilet a lot. I think everyone at work thinks it was me. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 934
    You deserved it 115
    Share  

    Copycat

    By Anonymous - 23/10/2021 14:00 - Canada - Enderby

    Today, my father-in-law announced the name of his new son, my husband's half-brother. The first name and last name is the same as our son, who I gave birth to 4 months ago. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 189
    You deserved it 99
    Share  

    But mah grandbabiiiiiiiiez

    By Anonymous - 20/10/2021 02:00

    Today, my mother found out that my fiancée broke up with her last boyfriend because she didn't want kids and he did. She's now demanding that I either change her mind, or call things off with her. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 947
    You deserved it 127
    Share  

    Quality family time

    By Anonymous - 18/10/2021 08:00 - United States - Verona

    Today, I made a nice dinner for my relatives, as we share the same quarters for lockdown. For an hour, I had to hear the same old complaints about other relatives for the last ten years that I have been hearing about every day since lockdown. I wanted to scream. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 789
    You deserved it 115
    Share  

    Godammit Ursula!

    By Anonymous - 18/10/2021 05:00 - United States

    Today, I found out that my sister has been telling people I’ve been dead for the last 3 months, to cover up the fact she used me to commit identity fraud. We’re identical twins. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 197
    You deserved it 81
    Share  

    DST FML

    By Anonymous - 06/10/2021 08:00

    Today, my partner and I spent the last 3 days transitioning our 19 month-olds bedtime by 15 minutes each day for daylight savings, only to find out we've been going the wrong way. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 372
    You deserved it 1 313
    Share  

    Barf

    By Anonymous - 05/10/2021 20:00

    Today, I spent all day cleaning the carpets in every room. I own two dogs and a cat, so deodorizing and deep cleaning the carpets is an all-day chore. At 9 p.m., after I was done with the last room, I went out to the living room and saw one of my dogs had been sick all over the place. Had to reclean the carpet. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 045
    You deserved it 228
    Share  

    Blues Junior III

    By Anonymous - 05/10/2021 11:00

    Today, one of my coworkers was recently promoted, so I'm now officially the last person of our team, hired in the same year, to still have "junior" as part of my job title. Not that it’s relevant, but I’m also the oldest member of the team by about 15 years, yet still "junior." FML
    I agree, your life sucks 990
    You deserved it 266
    Share  

    It's been a while

    By Anonymous - 03/10/2021 11:00 - United States - Perkasie

    Spicy Spicy
    Today, I finally had someone else touch my man parts. It was my doctor, checking for testicular cancer and a hernia, as part of my yearly physical. He's the only person other than myself to touch my junk in the last 4 years. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 170
    You deserved it 233
    Share  

    Your secret is safe on FML

    By Anonymous - 01/10/2021 22:59 - Egypt

    Spicy Spicy
    Today, it was my wedding, and I live in a country that doesn't take premarital sex lightly. My wife chose the last girl I slept with to be her main bridesmaid. She doesn't know. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 473
    You deserved it 2 209
    Share  

    Run, run now

    By Anonymous - 01/10/2021 08:00 - United States - Laveen

    Today, my husband controls every part of my life and has done so for the last 10 years and I'm too much of a pussy to leave. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 005
    You deserved it 490
    Share  

    Cheap labor

    By franzia - 25/09/2021 14:00

    Today, I got broken up with, after renovating her family's apartment over the last 9 months. She even waited until I'd hung the last lights, whose shipment was delayed. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 326
    You deserved it 98
    Share  

    First date, and probably the last

    By DrunkGirl - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - France

    Today, I went on a date with an awesome guy. I got super hammered and punched him in the face. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 9 780
    You deserved it 63 406
    Share  

    Don't give in!

    By Pissed off and scammed. - 10/09/2021 05:00

    Today, my girlfriend is still mad at me because I got a MINISO cup and she doesn't have one. I was actually given that mug yesterday as a prize for working the extra hours I was forced to do last week without getting paid. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 974
    You deserved it 98
    Share  

    Family ain't all it's cracked up to be

    By Fitz - 09/09/2021 22:59

    Today, I finally read an email I'd been avoiding. I thought it would be from my dad whom I haven't spoken to in years, and that he was checking on me during the pandemic. It turned out to be spam. The last contact I had with anyone related to my dad was one of his ex's friends, saying she was in jail and needed help. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 841
    You deserved it 115
    Share  

    Libertarian nightmare

    By Juan Carlos - 09/09/2021 08:00

    Today, when I checked on my last payroll, I realized that I pay more in taxes than I do in house bills. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 837
    You deserved it 128
    Share  

    And yet you have phone? Curious Andy

    By Nostalgia - 08/09/2021 20:01

    Today, I packed up to get ready to move to my boyfriend’s. I just graduated high school and I don’t get along with his mom, but I have no other choice of living. I was supposed to move in with his family tomorrow but now his mom won’t let me. It was last minute, and I’m basically homeless. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 041
    You deserved it 355
    Share  

    Taking liberties

    By Bernie - 07/09/2021 20:01 - United States

    Today, my live-in mother-in-law gave away the family dog because it’s "one less mouth to feed." Last week, she "accidentally" threw away the mail, thinking it was junk mail. No matter how hard I try to convince my wife to kick her out, she tells me, "But that’s my mother, though." FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 411
    You deserved it 164
    Share  

    That's sick

    By Howww_06 - 04/09/2021 11:01 - Denmark

    Today, my teacher said that since I was sick last week, I had to do all the work that the others had done, which I didn't know about because no one said anything about it. So now I've got to watch a total of 5 hours-worth of documentaries, and write analysis of them. Before tomorrow. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 913
    You deserved it 199
    Share  

    It's not me, it's you

    By Anonymous - 02/09/2021 14:01

    Today, my boyfriend of the last 2 years, who is suicidal and heavily depressed, left me because he thinks I "deserve better". Not to mention I was his best friend, therapist, mother and girlfriend all in one. He left me with rent due in a week and all other expenses because he couldn’t take care of me in return. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 117
    You deserved it 237
    Share  

    Old memories

    By Will T - 01/09/2021 01:01

    Today, I pulled a groin muscle. While cleaning the cat litter box. The last time this happened, I was playing high school football. 40 years ago. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 815
    You deserved it 123
    Share  

    Private everything, always!

    By Unemployed - 31/08/2021 16:01

    Today, I received an e-mail telling me the job offer I got last week was rescinded. Apparently, the memes I share on my Instagram page are "tasteless" and don’t fit the company’s values. I forgot my profile is public. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 378
    You deserved it 1 948
    Share  
    • 26
    • 27
    • 28
    • 29
    • 30
    • 31
    • 32
    • 33
    • 34
    • 35
    FML on Facebook

    Keywords

    Miscellaneous Poopoo peepee Mental health Psychology Work Cheating Kids Weddings Drunk Embarrassing Love Singing Health Sports Furniture Transportation Airplanes Awkward Smartphone Grandparents Photography Annoying Relatable Job interview Proposal My ex Social Media Weird Introverts Parents
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, our new cat, which my mum was hesitant about letting us keep because she believes they're diseased, gave us all ringworm. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 31 222
    You deserved it 13 535
    Today, my five year old daughter asked me what a divorce was. When I asked why she wanted to know, she replied with "Daddy wants one. He says you can have me." FML
    I agree, your life sucks 70 080
    You deserved it 4 187
    Today, I discovered that my family routinely waits until after my bedtime to order a pepperoni pizza, my favorite food. If that wasn't bad enough, I'm 17 and still have a strictly enforced bedtime. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 4 534
    You deserved it 558
    Today, after 5 hours of attempting to sleep, I began to finally drift off. Then, some fuckwit who'd parked his car right outside my door took 20 minutes to switch his alarm off. I have to be up in about 4 hours, after a 12-hour night shift, heading into another. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 667
    You deserved it 125
    Today, I realized that for 31 years I have been defending our children to their father. Our oldest is 31. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 500
    You deserved it 228
    Today, as an adult, I finally got to meet my great-grandfather. I had no idea he was still alive, since my parents and even my grandpa never told me. When we met, I found out why my family like to pretend he doesn't exist: This senile 93-year-old is by far the most racist person I've ever encountered in my life. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 531
    You deserved it 168
    Download on the App Store Our app is now available on Google Play

    Even more FMLs

    • Nearly FMLs
    • Top FML
    • Random FMLs
    • Moderation
    • FML - The Follow-Up

    Useful links

    • FAQ
    • Contact us
    • Terms of use
    • The list of badges to find

    FML around the world

    • Français
    • English
    • Español
    • Deutsch
    • Italiano

    © VDM SAS, All rights reserved

    ​