Today, while riding a roller coaster, I got hit in the chest by a wasp going 80 miles per hour. As if that didn't hurt enough, it somehow managed to survive and fall down my shirt. It crawled around and stung me a few times before the ride ended. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, this huge wasp started flying around me. I freaked out and started running from it. Then I slipped, landed face-first in some dog poo, and got stung by the wasp on my leg. FML
Today, there was a gigantic wasp in my room. It stupidly flew upwards and got hit by the rotating fan. It then immediately decided to take it's revenge by stinging me. FML
Today, I was riding my motorcycle on the highway and wearing all of my gear - boots, gloves, jacket, and full-face helmet. Somehow a bee found the only spot not covered on my body and stung my neck. I'm allergic to bees. FML
Today, I was at a stop light and a bee landed on my leg. I screamed and started swatting it. It flew into my jacket and I started to strip my jacket off, taking my foot off the brake. I hit the car in front of me and deployed the air bag, breaking my nose. Then the bee stung me in the back. FML
Today, I had food poisoning. When I was finally able to drag myself to the kitchen for some Gatorade, I got stung by a wasp. FML
Today, there was a wasp tangled in my bed sheets. I found this out when I rolled over it in my sleep, and it stung me on the lower back. FML
Today, a wasp knocked me out, broke my glasses, and left a gash over my eyebrow. It did so by flying under my glasses while I was playing my guitar, causing me to reflexively bat at it with the hand that was still grasping the guitar neck. FML
Today, I saw a wasp on the ground, apparently injured and unable to fly. It was being mobbed by ants and looked certain to die, so I stamped on the ants to save its life. At this point it sprung up, stung me, then flew off. FML
Today, I was stung by a wasp. Startled, I stumbled and grabbed a nearby tree branch to regain my balance. The branch happened to be the location of the wasp's nest, which fell to the ground and split open. The wasps weren't happy. FML
Today, I went on a rollercoaster for the first time in years. Almost immediately, I realized that my shorts were no match for the forces of gravity. I spent the rest of the ride clinging to my seat for dear life while trying to subtly cover my exposed ass. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Feklfekl2222 32
I thought wasps stung not bit
tencalories 3
your not the first
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (220)
SelenaJerzak 0
lol sucks
do20ss 4
wasps sting not bite, stupid b*tch HA
geeksaresexy 18
Wasps also bite stupid..
geeksaresexy 18
Some wasps bite to lay eggs in the wound so they would still bite even though they can sting
flockz 20
(puts on full body sting free suit) hey ur making wasps sound a whole lot scarier thanni previously thought.
ChickenInMyKitch 4
I love how the first five comments on the FML are are all "buried" cause of the negative likes hahah
allard 14
Do20ss, go jump of a bridge champ, before you decide it's okay to abuse someone you don't even know, on the Internet, perhaps you should get your facts straight.
yuviluv 5
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
don't wasps only sting you once and then die?
mk58 31
Nope, those are bees.
pharmbrooke35 0
no #3 that would be bee's
daAce77 8
^you're a little late
geeksaresexy 18
Wasps and bumble bees can sting more than once. Honey bees are the ones who only sting once, they have barbs on their singers which get caught in the skin. As they pull away the stinger comes off which pulls out their digestive system.
JesusFishTaco 5
31-Thanks for irritating my intestines.
yougotapes 7
poor bumble bees^^ reminds me of that one movie.... but anyways fyl op
ScaughtieHolden 11
Herp derp that's bees.
tobabo101 0
#31 that was very informative , thanks for that :)
JesusFishTaco 5
38-Bee movie?
geeksaresexy 18
I was going to make it a little more graphic but thought maybe some wouldn't appreciate it :p I love how right after my comment someone just said 'Poor bumble bees' no... Honey bees.. lol
stepho14 0
bees honey...only bees
loveuforever 0
Very descriptive. Haha. Ew...
JesusFishTaco 5
52-No go ahead. Make it more graphic. No one minds. *Gets bucket ready*
jokerrose57 0
Common sense you idiot.
DeadxManxWalking 27
nor bees
SoccerRebel594 0
Actually, it's a common misconception, only honey bees have stingers, bumble bees do not. And wasps can sting you a lot...I was riding my bike and got stung 4 times by one before it fell off of me.
geeksaresexy 18
Bumble bees DO have stingers
LolMoqz 10
BooBees
JesusFishTaco 5
geeksaresexy is just whipping all of you guys asses with her bee knowledge
choose8 0
That's bees
Leatherandlace 0
That's bees.
wordnerd42 0
We've just met the real MC Knows Too Many Facts About Bees from Jon Lajoie's WTF Collective 2! What an honor :)
AnagenisisZagus 13
Yes..... if they're bees. I can guess you commented quickly to get the first one, but please research before you say that shit, man.
mimibabyyx3 0
wasps stings you over and over they don't stop once they sting you and you're nearby their hive, the whole hive can come out and sting you too. it was on the news when those kids from the school bus got attacked by a yellow jackets kinda scary cuz they don't die after one or two stings. they bite too lol
darkness4dummies 0
same thing happened to me except it was like ice cream or something like that......... Hope you feel better :3
salvorican 24
How did ice cream get on a roller coaster?
CaptainDouche 0
it must have been a really tall ice cream.
FMASS 0
maybe they had ice cream hit them in the chest while they were on roller coaster
CaptainDouche 0
No shit.
elmorous 0
Your ice cream bit you?
starile 20
The ice cream was hungry. And angry!
limblessorphan 4
can icecreams sting more then once or do they die after the first time?
dolphincheddar 10
101, it depends in the flavor, vanilla dies once it stings but chocolate doesn't, for example
limblessorphan 4
straciatella must be really hazardous then!
Leatherandlace 0
How is that in any way related to this? A wasp stings or bites, ice cream sits there.
CanWeMicrowaveIt 11
Nonononononono It is common misconception Chocolate stings, they are also known as the Lactosa Cocolial, and all flavors in the Lactosa family have no stingers. Chocolate bites, Vanilla stings once, And strawberry is made from ginger hair, making it even more potent. Sometimes they can sting as many as 100 times before melting away or you killing them. Their wildlife counterpart would be Africanized Honey Bees. if you ever come across a Strawberry in the wild, run like hell.
justsayin27 0
so how many times did it bite you??
morganxangela 0
Alot!(;
Music_Is_Life101 0
-.- wasps don't bite genius.
Mystery_Machete 2
#88, then how do they eat?
roeallen 11
Yes #104! Thank you.
mooshibear140 4
5, wasps don't bite they sting. And the FML said it managed to get him a few times, so probably around 3(ish).
pharmbrooke35 0
dang that wasp had a death wish
mk58 31
That's in retaliation for bumping into poor Waspy. You were in his way.
comepoopwithme 0
for some reason i could relate this to steve erwin's death.
comepoopwithme 0
irwin*
ATLBOI770 0
are they like bees they die when they sting?
Robbums 1
no wasps can sting more than once.
rawr666 0
unfortunately, no. I learned that the hard way :-/
toastyjustice 5
no they can sting you agin and again...and again