Today, while riding a roller coaster, I got hit in the chest by a wasp going 80 miles per hour. As if that didn't hurt enough, it somehow managed to survive and fall down my shirt. It crawled around and stung me a few times before the ride ended. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, this huge wasp started flying around me. I freaked out and started running from it. Then I slipped, landed face-first in some dog poo, and got stung by the wasp on my leg. FML
Today, there was a gigantic wasp in my room. It stupidly flew upwards and got hit by the rotating fan. It then immediately decided to take it's revenge by stinging me. FML
Today, I was riding my motorcycle on the highway and wearing all of my gear - boots, gloves, jacket, and full-face helmet. Somehow a bee found the only spot not covered on my body and stung my neck. I'm allergic to bees. FML
Today, I was at a stop light and a bee landed on my leg. I screamed and started swatting it. It flew into my jacket and I started to strip my jacket off, taking my foot off the brake. I hit the car in front of me and deployed the air bag, breaking my nose. Then the bee stung me in the back. FML
Today, I had food poisoning. When I was finally able to drag myself to the kitchen for some Gatorade, I got stung by a wasp. FML
Today, there was a wasp tangled in my bed sheets. I found this out when I rolled over it in my sleep, and it stung me on the lower back. FML
Today, a wasp knocked me out, broke my glasses, and left a gash over my eyebrow. It did so by flying under my glasses while I was playing my guitar, causing me to reflexively bat at it with the hand that was still grasping the guitar neck. FML
Today, I saw a wasp on the ground, apparently injured and unable to fly. It was being mobbed by ants and looked certain to die, so I stamped on the ants to save its life. At this point it sprung up, stung me, then flew off. FML
Today, I was stung by a wasp. Startled, I stumbled and grabbed a nearby tree branch to regain my balance. The branch happened to be the location of the wasp's nest, which fell to the ground and split open. The wasps weren't happy. FML
Today, I went on a rollercoaster for the first time in years. Almost immediately, I realized that my shorts were no match for the forces of gravity. I spent the rest of the ride clinging to my seat for dear life while trying to subtly cover my exposed ass. FML
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Top comments
Feklfekl2222 32
I thought wasps stung not bit
tencalories 3
your not the first
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Comments (220)
dolphincheddar 10
I give a fuckjeez. but I only give it to people I like
cera1756 0
Bees don't "bite" they sting once n die
jazzyjada10 6
nobody said anything about "bees"....
marylovesyou8D 7
dear god people I think we understand that wasps can sting multiple times by now; you can stop saying it. smh...
ADiNozzo 1
Wasp sting they don't bite.
Jdgaf 3
first if all wasp don't bite
jazzyjada10 6
it's funny how some people waste their time looking up stuff and then coming back on here trying to sound like some wasp- expert...
VasilisaUzhasnaj 29
To some it's just common knowledge. Not all of us are completely oblivious, especially since the fact has been beaten to death by now.
mrmerino 0
I always though that wasps sting, not bite.
sirdolittle 0
Apparently, they do both. It's never too late to learn !
giveitdub 0
That sucks!
hysterical 1
Misplaced modifier! Anyway, roller coasters don't usually go 80 mph, do they? We have a vertical drop coaster near where I live, and I read somewhere that it only goes 50 something miles.
humorizer 14
Wasps most definitely bite. Check out youtube. There's a video of like 3 wasps taking down an entire nest of bees by biting their heads off.