Miscellaneous: Today, my boyfriend was buying a new hockey stick; to test it...

By Anonymous - 21/03/2011 03:34 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was buying a new hockey stick; to test it out he started hitting a ball around the aisle and decided to shoot it back into its bin. Instead the ball hit me dead in the mouth, giving me a fat lip. Instead of consoling me, my boyfriend yelled "GOAL!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 936

You deserved it 6 690

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Same thing different taste

Boing

By lily - 18/08/2019 12:00

Today, I was about to kiss my boyfriend in a courtyard when a soccer ball hit me in the head, hard. My boyfriend remarked that it made a "hollow sound" when it hit me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 602

You deserved it 191

By bruised - 19/05/2016 20:54 - Australia - Sydney

Today, while playing hockey, one of my teammates decided to swing her hockey stick like a golf club. She missed the ball, but managed to hit me right in the vagina. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 308

You deserved it 1 238

The name of that old man?

By thisblows - 11/04/2009 20:42 - United States

Today, I was at a professional hockey game. I wasn't paying attention and a puck was shot into the stands and hit me in the face. My mouth was bleeding and I lost two teeth. As I was trying to cough up my teeth the old man next to me shoved me over and stole the puck. Everyone cheered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 176

You deserved it 5 579

By anonymous - 18/12/2010 09:11 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around. He threw me over his shoulder and turned around, smacking my face against the wall. Then he smacked my head into the fridge after turning round to see "what that loud bang" was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 403

You deserved it 4 468

By Anon - 08/11/2010 18:34 - Singapore

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. He got a text and reached over to get his phone. In the process, he elbowed my face and busted my lip. He laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 028

You deserved it 4 182

By Username - 22/02/2010 05:44 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 097

You deserved it 3 316

By Vicky - 26/12/2009 20:47 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend went to kiss me as we were walking home. It was very icy and he slipped. His teeth went through my lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 160

You deserved it 2 927

Ballshot

By Anonymous - 02/12/2022 14:00

Today, I shot my boyfriend in the balls by mistake, twice. First it was a paintball gun I was using with my nephew, then it was a slingshot I use to scare away the bird who keeps eating fish from my pond. He is now sat icing his groin acting like I did it on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 294

You deserved it 962

Fight Club for Dummies

By Jeff - 23/05/2019 22:21

Today, my boyfriend and I were play fighting. He said, "I should stop trying to hurt you," before punching me in the face. I lost a tooth. He found it hilarious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 994

You deserved it 262

I'M SORRY!

By Anonymous - 25/08/2023 04:00

Today, I got back at my boyfriend for sticking the hoover nozzle in my mouth as a prank by doing the exact same thing to him. Unfortunately, it must have burst a blood vessel in his lip because it swelled right up and his entire lower jaw on the right side is just one massive bruise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 570

ManBearP1g 0

Monday 21 March 2011 8:37

Take a tennis racquet and whack him and say deuce.

sweet_candy_ 17

Monday 21 March 2011 9:00

Kick his balls and then say GOAAAAAAL.

Comments

smerry 3

Monday 21 March 2011 8:36

Fyl

C6Racer 0

Monday 21 March 2011 8:50

GOAL!!!

Mesocoollike 8

Monday 21 March 2011 9:40

FTW

ruben_A_ruiz 0

Monday 21 March 2011 11:01

Best comment EVER!

intheboot 0

Monday 21 March 2011 15:33

game on!

Katie_the_Great 6

Monday 21 March 2011 23:59

GOAL!!!

Katie_the_Great 6

Tuesday 22 March 2011 0:02

GOAL!!!!

fl0ffy 0

Tuesday 22 March 2011 2:39

wow hahaha tht sucks ouch GOAL!!!!! I <3 this FML

natirixoxo 0

Tuesday 22 March 2011 5:03

well now you have the perfect excuse to never give him head again. so goal!

Adorlee 11

Tuesday 22 March 2011 8:08

Lol ^ yea you should tell him what 106 said than scream GOAL!

briiana012 3

Monday 21 March 2011 8:36

hahahaa!!

Ohmygiluvcookies 0

Monday 21 March 2011 23:53

hahaha that's funny! chill out OP he was just playing around sometimes my boyfriend plays around like that but I get him.

tulsafml 0

Tuesday 22 March 2011 2:07

Congrats on the boyfriend who is NHL material. He is really good. Lol. Anti flood protection pisses me off. it sucks and what does it even mean?

L3Paparazzo 7

Tuesday 22 March 2011 4:53

canadian boyss these day lmfaoo

babbu18 0

Wednesday 20 July 2011 23:37

haha juz be glad it waznt a real hockey puck... those hurt...... trust me, I got hit in the stomach from my brother.....

babbu18 0

Wednesday 20 July 2011 23:37

haha juz be glad it waznt a real hockey puck... those hurt...... trust me, I got hit in the stomach from my brother.....

babbu18 0

Wednesday 20 July 2011 23:37

haha juz be glad it waznt a real hockey puck... those hurt...... trust me, I got hit in the stomach from my brother.....

ManBearP1g 0

Monday 21 March 2011 8:37

Take a tennis racquet and whack him and say deuce.

DarkJoy_fml 5

Monday 21 March 2011 9:22

No say love :)

GabiIsPrettyKewl 0

Tuesday 22 March 2011 0:04

hahahahaha funny

Jeditnkr 0

Monday 21 March 2011 8:37

TRI for having such shitty taste in men.

marinus_fml 19

Monday 21 March 2011 8:37

Maybe he was aiming for your mouth.

C6Racer 0

Monday 21 March 2011 8:59

That's what I usually do on weekends.

j300zx 0

Monday 21 March 2011 10:35

You let people aim for your mouth? ^ Gross.

vsx2000goton 0

Monday 21 March 2011 12:21

That's what I was thinking 5. OP, get a new boyfriend.

seximexi911 10

Monday 21 March 2011 17:03

haha it's a little bit funny, if I was her I would have laughed it off. because honestly, how often does that happen. haha

resinnet 0

Monday 21 March 2011 18:34

76- doubt you'll be able to laugh with a busted lip. Especially by a hockey ball.

fl0ffy 0

Tuesday 22 March 2011 2:42

its hockey puck not ball.... and 5 is so strong...

thanuja 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 17:44

He got balls in her mouth! Definitely a goal. (;

GTFL_Later 0

Monday 21 March 2011 8:38

cool....

hnz 13

Monday 21 March 2011 8:42

my first reaction would of course be "goal". he can apologize after that and laugh together...

Kingman17 0

Monday 21 March 2011 8:42

Aisle*

Bano360 25

Monday 21 March 2011 20:56

She said aisle?

xXSillyLoveXx 0

Tuesday 22 March 2011 17:22

Or it was corrected by the mods, but sometimes people actually try to correct something that doesn't need correction. Grammar-Nazis in training I guess. Amatures!