Today, I had my new boyfriend come over. Within five minutes of him arriving, I accidentally let one rip. Shocked, I quickly tried to explain it away with, "That was my shoe." I was barefoot. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was chatting with my boyfriend and his mates barefoot on the grass. I suddenly felt something flick across my feet, so I let out a startled scream. Turns out it was my toe hairs rustling in the breeze. FML
Today, while out with my boyfriend I accidentally let out a rather large fart. I was in such shock the only sentence I could make was "I farted." Clearly he was in shock too because the only words he could utter were "I know." FML
Today, I had just gotten out of the shower when I thought I had to fart, so I ripped it. instead, I shat all over myself and my floor. I'm 30. FML
Today, my boyfriend walked out of the bathroom, informed me he'd accidentally peed on the floor, and told me I could clean it up when I get a chance. FML
Today, at 2am, I heard a strange sound coming from the hallway. I walked over, only to discover my drunk boyfriend pissing in the closet. On my favorite shoes. FML
Today, my boyfriend, who is also my boss, was giving me a blowjob at work. Halfway through, his boss knocked on the door and I had to quickly get dressed and slip out the other door. After leaving, I realized that I was still barefoot and I had to walk back to my desk in front of my colleagues. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when he did his business. He then stepped all in it and coated his paws. As I was struggling with him, I slipped and landed butt-first into his steaming pile. My boyfriend nearly fainted from laughing. FML
Today, while in bed with my boyfriend, I accidentally let one slip. While thinking "maybe he didn't hear, maybe he's sleeping", the shaking of the bed from his laughter let me know otherwise. FML
Today, after having a naked wrestle with my boyfriend, I discovered he'd left a skidmark on my stomach. FML
Today, while out at dinner with my boyfriend, I accidentally ripped out my tampon picking a wedgie. FML
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Top comments
old09 11
They're invisible I swear!
rattusrattus 19
GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASP! You can't let your boyfriend know that you're a human being with bodily functions! He will never want one of those! Your relationship is doomed! *clutches pearls, swoons*
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Comments (68)
BronayPonay 6
Now you guys are that much closer to realizing your both human, and do human things. If he can't accept your farts, he can't accept you as a person OP!
Ukeee_X 19
Why make a bullshit excuse? Everyone farts, he must understand.
shanee108 9
It's really not a big deal lol. No need to lie, that's not smart. He's kinda right there with you.
natsaysheyyy 16
Don't worry about it, OP. Everyone farts. Just say sorry and it's okay!(:
asnakelovinbabe 16
This is hilarious. As if women fart...
ICastillo 25
I've seen this on Myth Busters. They busted this myth, it's true woman fart and even poo too. :O
happle 21
But I've never pooed in my life!
hienzburgess 9
OP should've glared at him, and told him to go to the washroom if he had to fart.
sarah6786 14
That's GAStly.
Giluh 19
Hold on... Sense when do girls fart?!
sarah6786 14
*since.
ICastillo 25
#23 Since women could vote is when it all started.
gungun92 5
You should have just said it was a creak in the floor..that smells when u step on it lol
mosquito19 14
no no, you " intentionally " let one rip. you were " shocked " that it was loud.