Intimacy: Today, while trying to explain to my date that a small coffee... - FML

By Username - 21/01/2011 01:41

Spicy

Today, while trying to explain to my date that a small coffee would be fine, I said, "I'm cheap and I'm easy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 190

You deserved it 34 229

Intimacy

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Same thing different taste

By joanikens - 26/03/2016 19:02 - United States - Buena Park

Today, I'm a barista at Starbucks. When my crush walked in and asked how much his coffee would cost, I said a date. He said he'd rather pay for the coffee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 078

You deserved it 6 110

Cheap

By SmokeWeedErdayAllDay - 18/04/2020 17:00

Today, I was in the mood for some coffee, which is right down the street. I brought ten dollars with me, not knowing how much I'd need. When I approached the counter, the barista looked at my hand holding the ten-dollar bill and said, "Oh, our cheap things are on the left side of the menu." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 583

You deserved it 258

By negromancer - 11/07/2009 01:08 - United States

Today, I worked up the courage to ask my crush out for coffee after work. She agreed and I confidently said, "Alright, it's a date!" She replied, "Haha, a date with you? I'm just going for the free coffee!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 656

You deserved it 4 370

OK boomer moment

By Anonymous - 20/10/2015 13:39 - United Kingdom

Today, two women came into my place of work, complaining loudly that they couldn't afford a £3 course fee because they didn't have any money to spend on themselves. They were holding large Starbucks coffees. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 477

You deserved it 1 467

False economy

By Anonymous - 22/03/2023 16:00 - United Kingdom - Leeds

Today, I tried to save money by buying a generic brand of coffee instead of my usual brand. It tasted terrible and I ended up throwing it away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 525

You deserved it 313

By Charly - 05/01/2009 06:16 - France

Today, I sent a text message to this girl I've been flirting with for a while now saying "How about coffee?". To which she answered "Great idea, I'll go and make myself one right now". FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 171

You deserved it 3 377

By theuglyfriend - 17/07/2012 06:09 - United States - Riverbank

Today, I went to a coffee shop with my friend. The guy rang her up and said it was only a dollar as he winked at her $10 purchase. Then he rang me up at completely full price. She got his number and I got to be the ugly friend once again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 708

You deserved it 3 716

By ilovepancakes - 20/09/2016 00:29 - United States - Rolling Meadows

Today, after talking to the man whose car I scratched, we agreed that the damages and cost of repair were so low and instead of me paying I just buy him coffee. When I showed up he saw me, decided I was too ugly to have coffee with, and instead demanded full payment in cash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 181

You deserved it 1 404

By lamesauce - 15/02/2009 10:32 - Canada

Today, I went on a coffee date with a guy I'm interested in. He picked up his phone mid-date to finalize dinner plans with another girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 820

You deserved it 3 046

Strung out

By Anonymous - 22/01/2023 16:30 - Australia

Today, I realised just how caffeine dependent I am. I didn't have time for my morning coffee, work is out of milk, and I only have $1.30 in my bank account, so I couldn't buy a coffee. Today has been a struggle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 391

You deserved it 606

Next

Top comments

Skodos_fml 0

Friday 21 January 2011 9:02

She left you right? right?

TheRealFamilyGuy 5

Friday 21 January 2011 9:02

Sounds like the perfect women to me

Comments

Skodos_fml 0

Friday 21 January 2011 9:02

She left you right? right?

unfortunate_13 5

Friday 21 January 2011 9:25

what's wrong with that? it's just a good little joke to break the ice. i would have laughed.

iSitt 0

Friday 21 January 2011 9:27

If you are what you eat, then I'm cheap, fast and bad for you. - bumper sticker

unfortunate_13 5

Friday 21 January 2011 9:29

then you're also fat^^

ortega_fml 0

Friday 21 January 2011 9:30

in this economy i dont blame you.

emodude44 0

Friday 21 January 2011 13:34

If you are what you eat then I don't exist ;)

breakofdawn1 0

Friday 21 January 2011 14:05

I eat people what does that make me a person ? no that's to easy

ImanAzol 4

Sunday 3 April 2011 18:38

It makes you a Humanitarian.

MrCatman1125 2

Tuesday 16 October 2012 4:25

23 would be whatever her meal had ate. Example: If someone eats broccoli they are therefore broccoli ( you are what you eat rule in effect ). If you eat them they would be broccoli, so you would be eating broccoli and then be broccoli.

TheRealFamilyGuy 5

Friday 21 January 2011 9:02

Sounds like the perfect women to me

mamamiaaa_fml 12

Friday 21 January 2011 11:23

you mean a slore (**** + *****. oh yes, yes I did)? yes. yes it does.

Jizwold 0

Friday 21 January 2011 15:57

slores are great u barley have to talk to em and they'll **** u

ubetrwatchBN 5

Friday 21 January 2011 17:41

Giggity

Strebor 0

Saturday 22 January 2011 3:09

giggolo*

twat_luva 0

Saturday 22 January 2011 3:28

you may barely have to talk to them but prices are INSANE!!!! (even though she says she's cheap)

truthbetoldxoxo 0

Friday 21 January 2011 9:02

haha! so, your cheap and easy!! get over it!!

caroliquey 0

Friday 21 January 2011 9:04

I think he got it;)

Ruckainc 0

Friday 21 January 2011 9:05

So did you get some or not?

RedPillSucks 31

Friday 21 January 2011 14:59

Cold coffee and hot sex? Or vice versa...

eastangels 0

Saturday 23 July 2011 18:27

hahahaha youre a g dude

XxKyttixX 0

Friday 21 January 2011 9:06

lol wonder how the rest of that night went.

xxxJORDYBEARxxx 0

Friday 21 January 2011 9:15

wait y would u say that

DropDead77 11

Friday 21 January 2011 9:29

well hellooooo

DarkHelmet 10

Friday 21 January 2011 9:52

u just wanted him to know you were a *****!!! lol jk but you definitely let him know he was getting some that night

Monst3r21 0

Friday 21 January 2011 9:53

OP is a girl. they went some where and she just ordered a small coffee. then she said this

gooBUZZ 0

Friday 21 January 2011 13:33

Oh wow, you're a life saver! Thanks so much for pointing out the obvious and restating the FML. You're my hero!

freenuggets 0

Friday 21 January 2011 14:27

lmfao goobuzz

Keywords

Parents Kids Mental health Health Food Work Annoying Miscellaneous Gross Cooking Plumbing Awkward Surprise Cute Party Nature Animals Dogs Babysitter Sextoys Intimacy Love Holidays Cheating Insulting AITA Social Media Instagram Neighbours Sex

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