By Iron11 - 14/06/2016 20:52

Today, I had a date with a girl I've liked for a while. We went out to a nice Italian restaurant for dinner. I was obviously going to pay, but when the bill came I realized I'd forgotten my wallet. When I told her, she thought I was a cheap liar and now she won't answer my calls. FML
I agree, your life sucks 15 712
You deserved it 4 371

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Sounds like you dodged a bullet there. Anyone who expects their date to pay and is offended when they don't are usually cheap themselves.

usnwife 18

If you had clearly said you were going to pay I can understanding her being upset, but even so she overreacted and is a bitch. Could you not have offered to pay her back though and avoided it being an issue? I think it's safe to say you lucked out though, she doesn't seem worth your time.

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Sounds like you dodged a bullet there. Anyone who expects their date to pay and is offended when they don't are usually cheap themselves.

anon4ever 7

We don't know who asked who to the date. If he made it obvious to her that he was going to pay and then she ends up having to pay for both of them, I can understand her being upset. But not hearing him out sucks.

Usually the one who asks is the one who pays. She may have been in a tight spot herself and couldn't afford this restaurant. Op could have told her before hand or said something like I'll pay, only to realize they didn't have their wallet. Then it looks really bad to the other person who was expecting to not have to pay.

She didn't necessarily expect him to pay, we shouldn't assume. They may have been going halves on the meal, that's fairly standard practice. if I were in that situation I'd be pissed off too if looked like the other person was trying to shift the bill onto you to be fair

how is this getting upvotes? It wasn't Chili's, he said it was a nice restaurant. If you ask someone else to an expensive restaurant, YOU pay. This know-it-all kneejerk reaction in the name of "equality" needs to stop. He could have asked her by saying, "can I take you to dinner?" i.e. "can I pay for your meal at a restaurant?" She could be really broke trying to make ends meet and paying nearly wiped out her bank account. I think she should take his call and hear him out but she could have had a terrible experience before with a lying, cheap jerk - they do exist, you know.

Those are all good points, however, I find it immature she didn't answer his calls to at least hear him out. Then he can't pay or explain. I'd be upset too but I'd give him another chance.

Hell if she expected him to pay, its lucky she even had money on her. I've been on dates where the other person is paying so I don't bother grabbing my wallet and just grab essentials like my id and phone

I'm sorry but you don't ask someone out on a date and then expect them to pay. At most they should pay for their half but not the whole date. That's not how asking someone out works. Unless it's sorted out otherwise, the Asker should be prepared to handle the check. Op should have made sure he had his wallet.

Clearly we need an update

While I agree that she is overreacting and should probably hear OP out, I think there's another factor that's been forgotten. She thinks OP lied. For me, expecting to be paid for and then suddenly being asked to pay would be a minor inconvenience, but being lied to would be a huge issue. Not only is the "I forgot my wallet" line cheap, it also insults her intelligence, calls OP's character into question, and makes her doubtful of OP's motivation for asking her out. Granted, in this case, it wasn't actually a line, but she had no way of knowing that. Although I do think it would be fairer to give OP a chance to explain.

#16 Even if she thought he was taking advantage, she is acting like a childish moron because 1/ she won’t give him the benefit of the doubt, 2/ she will not give him the chance to pay her back. When I used to date (I’m married now), I would have never expected a man to pay for me, even if he asked me out. You say yes to a date because you’re interested in the person asking you, so it’s a win-win. Getting a free meal is a bonus that should not be expected all the time. If they offer, it’s nice and obviously up to you to accept. You can also offer to buy dinner yourself or split the bill.

I agree to an extent, but if he had to make an excuse to back out of paying (he'd be backing out of his own meal too remember) I'd be kinda annoyed too?

Normally it is expected of the man to pay

Speak your mind, but please try and be respectful.

usnwife 18

If you had clearly said you were going to pay I can understanding her being upset, but even so she overreacted and is a bitch. Could you not have offered to pay her back though and avoided it being an issue? I think it's safe to say you lucked out though, she doesn't seem worth your time.

As someone on a budget, if someone offered to take me out to a restaurant and took me to an expensive place then told me they couldn't pay, I'd be upset too.

A guy offered to take me out to dinner after the cinema, but he didn't drive so I had to pick him up. Once I had picked him up, I paid for the cinema as the food was going to be more expensive, we went to the restaurant of his choosing, ate, and when it came to him paying his half of the bill his card was declined. So I ended up having to pay for that too. To top it off, the guy ended up being a creep and telling people I was his girlfriend before the date even finished. OP's situation seems a little different though.

how do you leave your place and forget your wallet?

By being a human being, I assume.

If you don't have a car and don't drink alcohol it would make sense, but even so it tends to be one of those things you get in the habit of having when you leave the house, just like your house keys

Probably because he was nervous about his date.

shit happens. he could've forgotten it was placed elsewhere at an earlier time and assumed it was still in his wallet. I've done that many times.

mif_fml 27

He assumed his wallet was still in his wallet?

If she wasn't willing to hear you out She's obviously not worth your time of day.So it looks like you Dodged a bullet there.

I don't know why you wouldn't double check having your wallet before going out like this. I also don't get everyone saying OP dodged a bullet, if OP implied they'd pay then pulled this she has every right to be upset.

I don't think it is the fact that she is upset. That is understandable. It is the fact that she isn't even hearing OP out and letting him explain let alone, I am assuming, being able to pay her back. That part is the overreaction and bullet dodge people are referring to. But that is just how I am reading and viewing things

Honestly, to be fair there are scumbags who do that and pretend to be willing to pay them back.

If there really was a connection then she shouldn't have been so upset. Sounds like she wasn't the one

So if someone routinely lacks responsibility (and I'm exaggerating to make a point), it would be okay if they had feelings for each other? Setting yourself up for a lot of disappointment if you really believe that. She overreacted by not answering his calls but she had every right to be upset if he said he was going to pay and then couldn't.

#10 said "...so upset." I took that to mean if there was a connection she shouldn't have overreacted, which it seems you agree. She has every right to be upset, but should speak to him at least once to hear him out. It's like you're arguing but also agree so I'm confused a bit.

We need the OP here: how much was the bill and did you tell her in advance you would pay?

Tell her you made a mistake. After all you're human.

Steer clear of her OP