By Anonymous - United States - Springfield
Today, while taking part in a lifeguarding exercise, I was supposed to "drown" to get another guard to save me. After all was done, my boss called me into his office and screamed at me for "drowning the wrong way," and threatening our reputation. FML
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  Tali147  |  16

Did you master "the float". After you drown you have to let your limp body float to the surface of the water. Could you give your boss that little bit of extra effort he is looking for?

  truth_spitta  |  0

Just remember to inhale and exhale deeply...oh shit! That's right...just make sure you aren't 'in too deep' with a company that's gonna yell at you for doing it right lol

  9726  |  5

I'm willing to bet he screamed and splashed and caused a huge fit. That's not actually how most people drown. There's little splashing and only weak cries for help. By being loud and splashing he is creating a falsity for the new lifeguards to base what they should be looking for.

  KairoFallin  |  0

This is stupid because I got certified as a lifegaurd last week. When we did our rescues the boss shouldn't be all pissy about the person drowning. This is rather fake or the boss is a complete idiot.

  egc573  |  40

Actually, floating peacefully IS closer to how people drown in real life. A lot of the time, they don't move at all and their mouths are below the surface, suffocating quietly. That's why quite a few parents who lose kids to drowning claim they didn't notice--no splashing or choking out for help.

That may have been what OP was doing--the quiet, realistic kind. The boss (who probably isn't a lifeguard), watching the exercise, may have idiotically concluded that the OP "drowned wrong" because it wasn't drowning like you see in movies and TV. In that case, it's going to be the boss who ruins the organization's reputation, as asshole bosses often do.


72- Chill the fuck out! You're getting agitated way too easily. Holy crap, and I thought I was short tempered...

Calm down. It's FML, don't take things too seriously. It took me a while, but I got there.


I wasn't being serious lol. Everything i write on this is either a joke or just me saying it and this whole thread has been a joke to me lol. Trust me i'm the last person to take any of this serious.


Ah, I see. Well, I was referring to a combination of your previous comment and this one. But, as the song goes...

"If you're cool, then I'm cool, then we're cool..."

  alstbv12  |  13

I just wanted to say that your dog is incredibly cute. Labs are definitely one of the best breeds ever! I wish my 4 year old chocolate lab hadn't gotten cancer...