Today, while I was waiting at a red light, a drunk guy limped in front of my car, unzipped, and started pissing on my windshield. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, some unprovoked drunk asshole tried punching a hole through the windshield of my car. While I was driving it. FML
Today, while waiting at the bus stop, the guy standing near me started peeing on the sidewalk and on my shoes. FML
Today, I woke up to find myself drenched in piss after a long night of drinking. I immediately sprang into action, tossing my bedding in the washer and hopping into the shower. Running late for work, I threw on a nice dress and got into my car. Guess who also peed in the drivers seat? FML
Today, I was peeing in a urinal at a bar. A drunk guy comes in, and seeing no urinals open, he decides to pee between my legs from behind me. He didn't have good aim. FML
Today, I was at the park and needed to take a piss really badly. I opened my car door and stood to pee, but good old Mother Nature ran by and the wind blew it all into my car. My entire driver side smells like pee. FML
Today, I was at my local McDonald's having a leak when an extremely intoxicated man stumbled in, pulled down his pants, and started to pee on my shoes. FML
Today, a guy drunkenly professed his love for me. He did this after walking in on me peeing, which he decided was the time to tell me such a thing. FML
Today, whilst at a red light in my car, a homeless man with a spray bottle and a dirty rag came over to clean my windows. He started with the driver's window, which was wide open, and whatever was in his spray bottle smelled suspiciously like urine. FML
Today, from the balcony of my apartment, I watched helplessly as a teen came along and peed through my car's open window. FML
Today, I was at work, a grocery store, and my manager came up to me while I was on my lunch break. He told me that a customer said someone in the parking lot had been loitering around the cars. I went outside to investigate and saw a drunk man pooping on the front of a car. That car was mine. FML
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Top comments
Bzu123 8
you should have ran him over
bertyogurt 7
Yeah! Commit homicide! That'll show that rude ******!
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Comments (88)
Breegotcake 14
That pretty nasty but it could have been worse. He could have peed on you or in your car if you had your window open.
Miss_Latina 13
Or taken a dump
Breegotcake 14
That's only if he peed on the side of your car & you was at a red light. Still sorry that happened to you.
MakeTodayADTR 20
That was you?!
Black_Knight80 13
haha! awesome dude!
thomcmoore 23
That's either a tall dude or he's had to go for quite awhile.
jddrinker 6
What kind of car were you driving?
hanner12 13
Why did you think this was relevant?
Raleaf 26
#40 It's relevant so we know how great a feat this drunk man achieved. Was it a tiny car like a mx-5 that practically sits on the floor, or something larger like a SUV?...Getting your steam high enough for something like an escalade is pretty impressive.
jddrinker 6
And also if the OP is diving a Prius or smart car then they deserve to have it peed on.
hanner12 13
Oh haha, wasn't thinking that way.
Dumbledora 9
All you had to do was hit the gas just a little bit and knock him over. Honestly, I would have had to make a conscious effort to keep myself from flooring it if some knob were pissing on my car.
XxCrimsonxX 2
God doesn't exist. :3
japtap81 16
Why didn't u take a picture and call the cops for indecent exposure? Otherwise u should have backed up to see if he would try to keep pissing on ur car.
ep27 8
I would've ran him smooth over
worldclassrager 41
At least you don't have to worry about your car smelling for too long...a quick car wash should get rid of it