Today, while coming out of Walmart, I dropped a $50 bill. Some kid came running up after me yelling, "Hey mister, you dropped this!" as he ran past me laughing. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, on the way home, a guy yelled "Hey, YOU!" from behind me, so I walked faster. He ran up to me, shouting, "I said stop, asshole!" I almost pissed myself in fear, thinking I was being mugged. Turns out I'd left my wallet at the grocery store, and he was just trying to return it. FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML
Today, I went to a carnival. While walking around with my cousin, I saw a one hundred dollar bill on the ground. Just before I stepped on it, a man grabbed it. His words? "Don't you just hate it when that happens?" And he walked away. FML
Today, I went shopping with a friend. She picked up a hundred dollars on the floor that somebody dropped. I told her, "I feel sorry for the retard who dropped the money." When I got home, I checked my purse and realized that I was missing a hundred dollars. FML
Today, a customer handed me a 100 dollar bill. He then told me that it was my tip for doing a good job. He snatched it away just as I touched it, laughed, and said, "Just kidding." He then took his money and left the store. FML
Today, I found a $100 bill on the ground and was thinking, "I'm so lucky!!" I opened my wallet to find that $300 was missing. I looked back and saw some guy picking up $300. FML
Today, while doing self-checkout at Walmart, the cap of my laundry detergent came off as I scanned it and dumped all over me. FML
Today, I was at work at Walmart, casually walking in the middle of the store, when my foot caught on something, so I went flying forward and yelled, being caught off guard, to the point I had to pretend I was running for 3 seconds, then someone blocked my path so I suddenly had to stop. Everyone was staring at me. FML
Today, I spotted a $20 bill on the ground. As I bent down to pick it up, the wind blew it away. I ended up running after it like a cartoon character, only to watch it get stuck up a tree. I did consider climbing up said tree, but with my luck I would've fallen off and had to pay 100 times more in hospital bills. FML
Today, it was really windy and rainy causing me to trip and knock into a little kid. While still gathering myself, I apologized and patted the kid on its head. Then I see people around me starting to laugh. I turn and look at the kid, and discover I've been interacting with a trash can. FML
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Top comments
mccaincracker 6
I would have chased the kid down..
moosemonkey1000 6
So chase after him? He's a little kid they don't run that fast.
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Comments (196)
tennisrapper1 14
I agree. Chase him, and when you catch him just snatch it back and walk away LIKE-A-BAWSS!
theterrorist 0
Like a boss!!!
CarbonCoach 11
Those little ***** clench everything in their tiny fists that are impossible to force open.
nutella830 0
The real FML is that you were shopping at Walmart.
emfma 0
Who doesn't shop at Walmart?
nofearjenshere 12
"Save money, live better." Sounds like a good thing to me.
MistressCaitlyn 7
I don't shop at Walmart, but that's because where I live, most people tend to support small businesses, so our money goes right back in to the community. We have plenty of big box stores around, but it's usually the little shops that get the most customers.
demonmonkey 13
Amen to that, 13!
mcrisdeadxo 0
i agree with 13. lets shop where a nonunion business discriminates against over 1 million women, but the million lost against walmart. good thinking.
curlyfry33 8
I supported this comment because wallmart's prices are so low because they use child labor, which is extremely cheap. Thumb up if you support reducing the act of child labor.
darkmage4 0
i have to agree. i used to walmart. they treat you like dogs, and make you work like one too.
RainaMadeilline 0
You can go to walmart for anything. DON'T HATE!
Krish25 0
Wow, thats called stealing if u know who's it is. I blame the parents for not teaching the kid right from wrong. Now get that kid! Who's gonna believe its his
PInK_ExCiTeD 7
No shit Sherlock -.-
omarzrgz 3
Haha troll!!
micahsmommy 13
Where the heck were the kid's parents? Whatever happened to kids holding parent's hands or riding in the trolley?
DjeePee 25
Euhm, I bet this kid was a young 12 till 14-year-old teenage boy. They are capable to walk alone on the street, you know? And hey, OP, you made that kid's day!
perdix 31
You don't want to take big bills like that for Granted. ;)
linkinpark98 24
I see what you did there....
mrmusicman97 4
get in yout car ajd chase him if you cant run or just be more careful with your money
BunBunBabe 8
That's really funny and really shitty at the same time
perdix 31
Dumb kid, he should have just quietly pocketed the cash and sauntered off discreetly the other way. When 50 bucks is at stake, even the most mild-mannered businessman can suddenly become a combination of Usain Bolt and Chuck Norris.
tennisrapper1 14
But, if the business man becomes that chuck Norris/usain bolt combination, the kid won't be born for that to happen.
tennisrapper1 14
Basically, the combination will go back in time like usain can, remove the boy from life, fix every paradox like chuck can, and live life happily without losing the 50$ bill.
nfjskcbdkdjdjdn 2
At first glance I thought this said you were coming out AT Walmart. I was all like "what the…?"