Love: Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out...

By Anonymous - 03/04/2011 15:14 - United States

Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 760

You deserved it 6 428

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Same thing different taste

Sick burn

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend came home while I was making a snack in the kitchen. We started making out and he lifted me up and sat my ass on the hot stove. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 502

You deserved it 8 202

Baked

By Monty - 01/03/2009 08:45 - United States

Today, I was baking cookies. When I took the tray out of the oven, I closed the door, but it bounced back open and hit me in the back of the knees. That caused me to sit down on the hot oven door. I was only wearing my short bathrobe and no underwear. I really burned my ass and, um… stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89 536

You deserved it 15 623

Kitchen nightmare

By cookiemonster - 13/08/2013 16:10 - South Africa - Johannesburg

Today, after placing it on top of the stove, my hot tray of freshly-baked cookies slipped. I caught it, though. With my bare hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 466

You deserved it 6 697

Slapstick

By Anonymous - 05/10/2023 04:00

Today, as I was on the floor playing with the dog, my husband walked past, tripped over something, and fell on me, smashing his bony elbow right into my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 639

You deserved it 140

By Jaws - 10/02/2011 16:09 - France

Today, I got slapped in the face by my girlfriend with a banana skin, because I finished up the chocolate cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 783

You deserved it 38 606

By burned - 24/05/2009 13:44 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was cooking me dinner. He walked away and I decided to help by giving the pan of veggies a sautee flip. My boyfriend failed to mention that he had just pulled that pan out of a 500 degree oven. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 124

You deserved it 64 171

Thanks a bunch

By nose hurts - 30/12/2012 01:01 - United States - Richmond

Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 662

You deserved it 3 501

By ..… - 13/09/2011 14:48 - United States

Today, I was in a hurry to get something out of the oven, so I quickly grabbed my roommate's only oven mitt and grabbed the pan in the oven. It didn't take long to figure out there was a hole in it when my thumb hit the hot pan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 258

You deserved it 4 126

By Jlipka - 22/05/2010 02:33 - United States

Today, while house sitting, I went to take my pizza out of the oven, not realizing that the oven mitt had a hole in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 866

You deserved it 5 608

Smooth operator

By Nic - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I put on some skimpy shorts and bent down to get something on the bottom shelf of the fridge to get my boyfriend's attention. On my way up, I slammed my head on the edge of the fridge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 957

You deserved it 46 075

niiick97_fml 3

Sunday 3 April 2011 19:47

priceless.

xdust 4

Sunday 3 April 2011 19:49

Hansel and Grettal all over again. Your husband might be a witch.

Comments

towhomitmayconce 0

Monday 4 April 2011 4:11

That's why OP should stick to making sandwiches...

Hookemhornz14 0

Monday 4 April 2011 4:15

are u Jewish?

towhomitmayconce 0

Monday 4 April 2011 4:28

LOL! I kinda hate you now (because I am) but I make those jokes all the time too... so I gotta say win.

hihi1212 1

Monday 4 April 2011 4:36

you a little crispy now?

nathab_fml 0

Monday 4 April 2011 4:48

cant blame him I would have done the same thing

lexief1999 0

Monday 4 April 2011 4:48

OMG!!! you should have just seen my reaction to that......So so sorry.

bubblyszekolsom 2

Monday 4 April 2011 4:55

OW.

ihasbrains 10

Monday 4 April 2011 4:56

OP was riding on her amazing horse when her husband slapped her ass and she lost her balance and fell and broke her toe. Who sees what I did there?

DalPozzo13 10

Monday 4 April 2011 5:00

Damn

NCR 0

Monday 4 April 2011 5:02

a very hot situation?

melissaxDD 1

Monday 4 April 2011 5:04

epic failll

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I lost our virginity to one another. He then did a naked victory lap around his dad's house, blasting Akon's "I Just Had Sex" at full volume. He's legally an adult. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 602

You deserved it 6 100

Today, my best friend excitedly told me all about this new video game she'd just discovered that she thought I'd love. It was her Xmas present from me 2 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 287

You deserved it 236

Today, after my 5-year-old finally got over his grandmother's death, we went to a store and saw a lady that looked exactly like her. She came up to us asking if we saw her grandson; I can't get my son to stop freaking out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 770

You deserved it 2 568

Today, I was meeting up with my three best friends from high school. I spent the entire day and some money to plan a wild girls' night, only to find out their day ends in the afternoon. All three wear ankle bracelets and have a strict curfew. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 126

You deserved it 267

Today, I really needed to be cheered up a bit after having had a horrible, depressing weekend. Luckily the guy I've been dating for some time, and who I really like, invited me over for dinner. Apparently, he wanted to see me so he could tell me he thinks we should stop seeing each other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 365

You deserved it 4 230

Today, I'm sick. I got the flu shot for the first time ever this year and for the first time in my life, I have the flu. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 865

You deserved it 5 210