Today, while at my friend's house, I decided to climb up on a shelf and pounce on him when he came back downstairs. When I heard someone coming, I assumed it was him and pounced. It was his grandma carrying the laundry. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was in the basement at my grandma's house. The bathroom is on the ground floor and there's a laundry chute that goes down to the basement. I looked through the chute to see if the bathroom light was on. A pair of shitty underpants came down and landed in my face. They were my grandma's. FML
Today, I decided to surprise-visit my grandparents. After knocking on the door and not getting a response, I opened it and walked in. Upon entering their house and yelling, "Hello", as I turned the corner I saw my near-deaf grandmother folding clothes while watching TV. She was topless. FML
Today, I was watching TV with my grandma. She was looking for the remote, blindly trying to put her hand into the sofa. Instead, she shoved her hand down the back of my pants. FML
Today, I was playing hide and seek with my eight year old cousin. For the past two turns, he had been hiding in the bathroom. I saw the bathroom lights on, yet again, and opened the door with a triumphant "AHA!" It was my Grandma, taking a smelly dump. FML
Today, someone knocked on my door. I yelled "Yeah?" while getting up, since it was locked. My grandpa walked in, as I apparently didn't actually lock it. I was naked. FML
Today, I got jumpscared, by my freshly-bathed grandma coming out of the bathroom without a towel on. FML
Today, I went shopping with my grandma. She went to the bathroom and was gone for a long while. I jokingly asked, "What happened, you fall in?" She did. She had shit all over the back of her shirt. FML
Today, my senile grandad saw me and thought I was cutting class, so he pulled his belt off and came after me. While I was trying to get away, his pants fell off and he tripped over them. I'm now getting the blame for "making him have a fall". FML
Today, I shaved my pubes while staying at my senile grandma's place. I guess I didn't clean up properly, because she found some hair and insisted someone must have broken in while we were out and used the shower. I had to play along to spare myself embarrassment. FML
Today, I was doing laundry when my downstairs neighbour knocked on my door and handed me some knickers. Apparently, it had flown off the clothesline and landed on his head while he was sweeping outside. FML
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Top comments
rigorouswolf 0
is she alive?
rockclimber919 11
what, are you like ten?
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Comments (146)
Zebidee 9
YDI for being a cat that has learnt to type, got access to a computer, switched off the 'cat-like typing detected' software, found the FML website and submitted a story about life as a cat.
MissGrinch 4
HEY! It's not easy to type with these paws.
hpfan777 0
WTF
TropicalTulipz 0
nice....
1d1r1a1g1o1n 0
YOUR NOT A HUNTER
longtimesunshine 4
you're? & you never know!
Gloritank 8
Grammar Nazi!
Just_John 0
I really don't think pointing out one of the most basic grammar fails particularly means she's being a Grammar Nazi. Maybe just a Grammar Whermacht?
Zebidee 9
*Wehrmacht
nekocuppycakes 0
hahaha! Yesss :3
flashback.miss 28
Lol!Both this thread and the story are a laugh but op.... This us why this kinda jokes a but risky :)
itstephanieduhh 0
hahaha :) guess you learned your lesson
dohnuthead 2
you sir are an idiot
stevenmx86 8
Wtf were u doing jumping on someone from a shelf? What are you like 5?
LIFELONGFAIL_SM 2
Could you be anymore of a FAILURE?