Animals: Today, when I was at my girlfriend's house, I farted and blamed...

By kittydead - 29/01/2009 01:05 - Canada

Today, when I was at my girlfriend's house, I farted and blamed it on the cat. I forgot the cat died 2 weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 933

You deserved it 37 293

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Same thing different taste

Convoluted

By Anonymous - 14/11/2023 04:00

Today, while at home, I accidentally let out a big, loud fart near my dad. When he asked what the noise was, I blamed it on the cat. I remembered too late that we don't have a cat. My dad caught on quickly and grounded me for lying in front of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 136

You deserved it 672

By jf29 - 31/01/2009 00:49 - United States

Today, I drunkenly buried my girlfriend's recently deceased cat. Later she asked to see it and came back inside crying. It turns out I didn't bury it completely and its two back legs were poking out of the dirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 642

You deserved it 46 759

By Urinator - 16/09/2015 18:26 - United Kingdom - Inchture

Today, I invited a girl back to my house and she seemed cool. I then left to go to the toilet. When I came back, there was a giant wet patch on the rug. The girl then blamed it on my dog, whose picture is on the wall. My dog died last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 732

You deserved it 1 911

By nullpointer - 03/08/2016 04:38 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I farted so loud that my cat thought that I was growling at him, and bit me in self-defense. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 800

You deserved it 1 974

By CHStennis_4 - 03/09/2011 04:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 295

You deserved it 3 863

Blame the pooch

By anamota89 - 11/05/2012 09:33 - United States

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. I had to fart really badly, so thinking that he wouldn't hear me, I did so. He heard me and asked, "Did you fart?" I said "No, it was my dog." I don't have a dog, and he knows this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 336

You deserved it 32 285

By Anonymous - 30/08/2015 00:06 - Canada - Newmarket

Today, I found dog poop in my room that had probably been there for days. My girlfriend, who was watching the house, said she didn't realize it was there, because she thought it was the smell of her own farts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 693

You deserved it 2 201

By Mellamononeyobiz - 13/01/2016 02:10 - United States - Hooper

Today, my mom smoked pot in my sister's bedroom while I was at school. When I noticed the stench, she blamed the cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 145

You deserved it 1 628

By Catremorse - 01/08/2019 14:00 - United States - Centreville

Today, my cat was laying on my chest while I was in bed. I farted, which my closed legs seemed to amplify. My cat was so scared, she used me as a launching pad and cut my chest in three places with her claws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 356

You deserved it 549

By silentbutdeadly - 27/04/2009 22:04 - United States

Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend. His dog, Baxter, has a bad farting problem. I decided it would be okay to let a silent fart out and blame the dog. Baxter was outside when I blamed him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 995

You deserved it 77 601

chelseybuns 0

Sunday 29 March 2009 22:29

Wow. your that lame you can't remember when your love of your life/girlfriends cat dies... how sympathetic. And to fart wow. You totally stink dude. :(

hatinglife 0

Wednesday 8 July 2009 8:04

Wow you're a dumbass

Comments

egaonogenki 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 10:29

Some corpses do fart after death!

MrCatman1125 2

Thursday 8 November 2012 4:07

No, I don't think they do actually... And the corpse wouldn't still be in the house to fart probably. If it was, that's weird.

BillyMaize21 9

Sunday 6 November 2016 0:59

It's true, but two weeks afterwards is unlikely.

XxSlAyNnXx 0

Sunday 15 March 2009 23:19

EPIC FAIL.

andyvillarreal5 0

Thursday 27 May 2010 14:42

my thoughts exactly:)

chelseybuns 0

Sunday 29 March 2009 22:29

Wow. your that lame you can't remember when your love of your life/girlfriends cat dies... how sympathetic. And to fart wow. You totally stink dude. :(