Today, to avoid looking like a loser in front of his friends who all have girlfriends, my brother made up a perfect relationship. He asked me to give him a hickey in exchange for 50 euros. Our parents walked in on us. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my brother offered me $20 to practice his kissing on me for his date later this evening. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was unsure of the future of our relationship, so he gave me a gigantic hickey to "show the world that I'm his." I work as a cashier and see people I know personally on a daily basis. FML
Today, I came home to find my brother making out with my girlfriend while taking a selfie. FML
Today, my brother had his hot friend over. I decided to make a move because he was staring at me and smiling all night, so I asked him which holiday was his favorite, Christmas or Easter while I batted my eyes and smiled. That's when he said, "You have lettuce in your teeth." FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a hickey. On my forehead. FML
Today, my brother tried to pay me to teach him how to French-kiss, so he wouldn't screw up on his first date. I'm shocked that the weirdo managed to get a date in the first place. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over with a hickey on his neck. He thinks "The vacuum did it" is a believable excuse. FML
Today, I discovered that my stepbrother has been telling his friends that I'm his girlfriend. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's brother. When he saw me, he whispered into my boyfriend's ear, "So, this is your bitch eh? Nice!" FML
Today, my brother offered my boyfriend $50 to dump me. Guess who's single. FML
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Top comments
Cairo_Sanchez 8
That's just TOO desperate...
theunwiseone 4
DA *****???? O.o
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Comments (374)
comeatmebroo6254 1
I'm glad I found out you are a girl. I read this thinking you were a boy giving your brother a hickey... O.o
ThermiteKitten 8
Wait, -that's- the part you had a problem with?!
comeatmebroo6254 1
Phew. When I first read this I thought you were a guy. Still though, I think you could have made a fake one without actually biting his neck ?
RampantDoritoz 3
INCEST!!!!!!!!!!!
jfarrow9703 11
At least it wasn't for sex..... Sick *******!
Roo79 1
How old are you both and where the hell was the hicky? Just pinch him really hard! Done!
jesss_09x 0
Oh my god that is the most humiliating thing lol so awkward...
mccutie936 6
You are gross. Tell him to put a vacuum cleaner to his neck or something. Ew.
mosquito19 14
dude, thats ****** up. take the money but don't actually do it. he's not gonna tell you ripped him off. duh....
aznman1213 1
Europeans and incest....*tisk tisk* just couldn't resist?
babe7260 30
Eww Ewww Ewww , but totally made me laugh!!!!!