Today, the man who hit on me in a store and asked for my number showed up on my doorstep to inquire about my couch for sale. With his wife. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was talking to a nice guy on a dating app and we exchanged numbers. Later, I got a call. It was his wife asking me to stop talking to her husband. FML
Today, a guy asked for my number at the grocery store, but I politely told him I wasn't interested. He followed me home and took a shit on my doorstep. FML
Today, I got a call from the guy I have been seeing. I wasn't him. It was his wife wondering why I have her husband's number. FML
Today, a guy was hitting on me when I was at a café. I told him I was married, but it didn't deter him, so I told him to go away. Later, my husband came home from work with his boss for dinner and sure enough, it was the same guy who was hitting on me. Suffice to say, it was one awkward dinner night. FML
Today, a guy I went out with twice, and slept with once, came knocking on my door, hysterically crying. Apparently his wife found out about “us” and kicked him out. He’s now asking where he can put his stuff, since he’s now homeless. I had no idea he was married, and she’s now looking to fight me. FML
Today, I saw a shady looking person on the street. As I walked past him, he said, "Hey, come here." Thinking he needed something, I went over. He handed me several pictures of my wife, in public and at home. I've never seen this man before in my life. FML
Today, after a year and half of being single, I was asked out on a date. I was asked by a married man. FML
Today, I was at work, and some people came in looking for a particular couch. After looking for over an hour on the wholesalers website my boss walks over, makes me take my lunch break and then calls over the couple and takes all the credit for the sale. We work on commission. FML
Today, I received a phone call from the number of a "single" guy I met online. It was his wife, who is three months pregnant. She threatened to kick my ass. FML
Today, I found out that the sleazy guy I met with a few days ago decided to move into my home town to "be closer" to me. I've already told him I'm not interested in him, but he still continues to ask me out. FML
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Top comments
iloveanimeshow 6
ask if his wife would like your number too
AnnaDeWitt 27
At least it wasn't to inquire about the used underwear you're selling.
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Comments (40)
MrCareless 17
It is a small world, isn't it :)
fsomelife 26
Better with his wife than without. I thought this FML was going in an entirely different direction.
infinix_fml 5
At least now you can sell the couch for a few extra bucks if you know what I mean.
Mr_Saikaly 35
You should feel lucky for knowing the truth before going far with him
greencurtains74 11
there was no couch for sale, that's what the man said the number was for when his wife found it
worldclassrager 41
Maybe a coincidence have it listed online and it just happened to be you
False_Stupidity 42
I guess the scumbag hubby really needs that couch now, 'cause hes going to be sleeping on it for the foreseeable future after his wife finds out whats he's been doing. I hope the couch is as hard as rocks.
thisguy22 33
It is a small world after all!
skychu 18
Yes, your "couch" hahaha ;P Nobody said they weren't a swinging couple spicing things up a little. Time for a follow-up?
dakatabg 31
Small world